Pregnant with DC2 and other parents keep telling me two children is a nightmare

[londoncitymum]

Interested to know how much harder it is, what the good bits are and if it's just the same sort of doom-mongering you get about being a parent when you're pregnant with DC1. Is it really all that bad? DC1 will be 27 months when DC2 comes along...

I know those people..... ! I will have exactly the same gap as you when #2 arrives next month.

I'm anticipating it will be hard and the level of organisation and relative ease in our lives will take a massive hit but I would hazard a guess the jump from 1-2 is easier than 0-1.

They are definitely the same people who told me my first would never ever sleep, breastfeeding would be too hard, I'd never have any time to myself again, childbirth is the worse thing that can ever happen to you etc etc.

I have just gone from 1-2 and it's much easier than 0-1. I am more used to lack of sleep, I'm more patient and I have more perspective. It has different challenges, but so far I am feeling more in control than I did first time round. DS1 is 3.3 and DS2 is 14 weeks. Have fun!

I'm due dc2 on Wednesday and I am definitely feeling like a newborn will be easier than late pregnancy! My DS is preschool age rather than a toddler (3.4) but I do think the adjustment will be easier than the first time round!

Some people just enjoy doom and gloom! Now you realise that TV is for CBeebies, and 7 am is a lie in, the jump 1-2 is easier I think.
I have 25 months between my first two. And found it Much easier than first time round as I was (am?) quite an anxious tightly-wound parent. I just got quite uncharacteristically organised and would pack my backpack with 2 different sets of snacks/ nappies/ change of clothes etc the night before... And then it was fine.
I've gone on to have DC3-- so it wasn't that bad ;-)

I totally agree 2 dcs is easier than 1dc and late pg.

It's really not that bad once you get your head round the fact that baby 2 probably won't be picked up immediately every time they cry. You soon find a new routine/ways of doing things.

2 things that helped loads more than I anticipated 1. You know what you're doing! And 2. I found it really helped already having my mum life/ support network/ weekly activities in place.

It is of course tiring and I guess more work but it's also really really lovely watching your dcs together.

Good luck!

It depends how good you are at coping, I knew I couldn't have had 2 kids close together so mine are 3 and a half years apart. That worked really well for me as my elder was able to help me with little things.

I know there are a lot of people who say it's better to have 2 close together and get all the mess over and done with in one go but I know that wouldn't have worked for me

Agree it depends on how good you are at coping and what kind of baby you get.

My second was feeding constantly and didn't sleep for any period of time until she was 9 months and I found it very hard as I basically had no life to speak of as it was all about the Velcro baby

Friends have breezed through so it really varies

You will be fine I'm sure good luck

18 months between my two and a toddler with a newborn is definitely easier than being pregnant with a toddler. If you can be organised but also a bit laid back it's not a problem, most people have more than one and the world isn't full of people falling apart! Don't get me wrong, some days are harder than others but you have the benefit of experience second time around!

Living in the middle of nowhere having two DDs who, despite being absolute chalk and cheese, play together, do each other's hair and obsess about Dr Who, Sherlock and the Hunger games together is great.

There is three years between them and they have always been amazingly good together.

I'm not sure they would be if they weren't thrown together so much, by not having friends close by.

or if the age gap wasn't compressed by DD1 being dyslexic and DD2 being the best reader in the class.

2.7 years between my two.

Honestly: it was a nightmare to start with. DD was too old to make things easy (past buggy stage, tho I caved and bought a double just to be able to strap her down and get somewhere), too young to make things easy (potty-trained but couldn't hold the wee for more than 20 mins, couldn't walk fast enough or in a straight line before newborn DS needed feeding again). Thinking back, it was mostly about timing - everything was such a rush and the pressure from both (to be fed, to get to the loo) was always great and immediate.

Once past that stage, things settled down.

DD's 4.5, DS almost 2 and having two of them is definitely easier than having just one aged nearly 2. They entertain each other (with intervention to sort out squabbles), they're 'best friends', they share so well and think of each other all the time - DD will want to save some of her treat if DS is napping, DS will spot something if we're out shopping and say "[DD name] like that. Take home [DD]?". There are obviously hard days but I don't think hard days because of two, just hard days because of the behaviour of one of them, or illness or something. I love hearing DD 'read' to DS, I try to peek round the door without being seen .

19months between mine, wouldn't change it for the world

Between ds1 and ds2 there's a 14 month age gap everyone kept saying it will be awful but actually going from 1-2 I found it no problem. Not sure if thats because ds1 was quite a laid back toddler also had no school runs so i could take my time getting out the house.

now at 4 and 5 years they certainly keep me on my toes with 2yr old dd in tow...

Your'll be fine :)