You know you are pregnant when..... (finish the sentence!)

[Hubbythecatandme]

You know you are pregnant when..... your husband catching you eating two tins of sardines from a bowl and drinking orange juice with it.... It was absolutely delicious if you ask me!

What there's a crappy us obem?? How did I miss this!!

'You have all the episodes of 'midwives' recorded and regularly watch it when Dh is out so you can eye up which mw you want' (it was filmed in same hospital)

I think it's called 'Special Delivery' and it's hidden on the Really channel during the day. It's not funny & fluffy like OBEM.

If its a true reflection, things over there seem very medicalised!

....You are sore, tired, achey and look at all the wonderful painkillers and concoctions in your cabinet and cry because you can't have any of them....

You can't drink tea

The tea thing is so true. It was my first sign that something was different.

...you haven't been able to cuddle your dogs for weeks because the smell of their breath makes you heave :(

Yep i went off tea too but now oddly can have but only with sugar!?? Odd as i was a non sugar t drinker.

Sorry tmi but - you welcome that bout of diarrhoea because you've been constipated for so bloody long!

You are confused by the tub of yoghurt in the log basket but everything becomes clear when you find the screwed up newspaper in the fridge.

DH has to zip your coat up because you can't reach.

You fly into a rage because the sink appears to be blocked, then DH wonders over warily, gives you a look and pulls the plug out...

you consider the school run to be strenuous exercise.

you've developed a technique for peeing into a pot.

.... It takes you two hours
To walk around Asda

You can smell next doors dinner cooking with all the doors and windows closed!

U want chocolate digestives for breakfast! (And yep I still do it way too much at 28 weeks!)

You go out for a drink with friends and find you cannot even cope with a half (of anything). Projectile vomiting and extreme heartburn as punishment for even trying. But craving doner kebabs, strawberry milkshake and danish blue cheese is a welcome distraction later...

You park the car, open the door a crack then sigh, start the car and shift it over to the left 6 inches so you can open the door enough to get out.

You return to the car, the one parked on the driver's side has gone and been replaced with a giant brand new swanky car, really snuggled right up to your 8 year old, dinged, battered, entry level polo car. You weigh up your options of crawling through the passenger side for 2.5 seconds before swinging the driver door wide with an evil laugh of prego rage instead.

Whenthat the deal is whichever one of your dcs calls shotgun in the car has to do your shoelaces up!

Your toes disappear.
You can't remember the word for anything and your DH groans 'hurry up!' When difficult words like 'table' take ages for you to get out
You have random desires for specific foods then can't face them once they're made (this better not happen with my longed for takeaway tonight!)
You could fall asleep standing up.
You get breathless walking on the flat.

You cannot get up from a chair/sofa gracefully.

you forget how big you bump is when you have to squeeze past a display and take it all with you oh no thats never happened to me...

Your 6th form students are prompt with handing in homework/ starting work as they don't want to raise your blood pressure

Your 4yo has to pull you up off the sofa

You have to trust Dh to put matching shoes on you before leaving for work.

Dh smells funny (even when he has just got out of the shower)

Garlic is the food of the devil

When you cry hysterically for 20 minutes because your OH suggested you were ordering a takeaway that you won't eat once it's arrived because of nausea. (I ordered it, felt sick so couldn't eat it and could barely open my eyes because is cried so much my face had gone seriously puffy).

You can't enter the kitchen.

You stop at the supermarket to go to the toilet on your 20 minute walk home from work.

You love digestive biscuits but heave if hubby buys the same thing, but unbranded. What's that about?!

....you are violently ill at the smell of a brand of sensitive laundry detergent and have to completely change because, two years on, you still gag at the mere whiff of it.

Orange juice never tasted so good.

...you hate your new bladder capacity.

...

...you feel constantly hung over even though you haven't had a drop since November.

My ovaries hurt when I cough.

Eating something you know you're going to regret in half an hour because of bloody heartburn!!!

tea tastes rotten