Given you are in a situation where you might be induced due to a medical reasons, you have a bit of power here. You can refuse ANY medical procedure including induction. I am NOT suggesting you do, but it gives you an additional opportunity to ask what happens if you don't have an induction and what the alternative(s) would be. So from that point of view I don't think its 'too late' to certainly discuss your options.
If you are not happy with the potential risks of a vb and don't feel comfortable with what you are being told, then ask and ask and ask again. You are not being difficult, you just need to know why they are advising one route over another. The most important thing is you feel confident in what they are suggesting is the best option and understanding how they intend to reduce the risks based on your circumstances.
Don't forget they will be monitoring you closely, if you are higher risk. That might mean intervention is more likely. But it also means that they might intervene sooner than someone who is lower risk; is this necessarily a bad thing? It means they are less likely to let things get to a point where it is 'scary'.
Bare in mind that in terms of CS there are various categories. So there are ELCSs, EMCSs and then EMCSs. By that I mean that there are EMCS that are done much earlier and before things reach a critical stage. In the same way that an ELCS shouldn't really be compared with a EMCS there is an argument that not all EMCS should be directly compared to each other because of how planned/urgent they are.
Technically, an EMCS is any CS which is done once you are in labour. A planned ELCS can result in a EMCS, if the woman going into labour, but because its still planned and will be performed earlier its a lot less risky than a crash EMCS. Even an unscheduled EMCS can still be planned to a certain extent, if you go for a trial of labour under close supervision. Perhaps discussing how far they will let things go, or how long they will let you stay in labour before they would consider a CS might help to rest your mind about the risks of having a 'scary' EMCS but still allow you to attempt a VB.
In terms of BMI, they do not currently advice women to have an ELCS on the basis of their BMI alone even if they are statistically more likely to have a CS, because there are higher risks involved than for an 'average' woman. For example in terms of recovery, women with a higher BMI are disproportionately more likely to have a wound infection compared with smaller women.
To me, from what you've said, it sounds like you are not adverse to the idea of a VB in principle; you just want to do the best thing and minimise the risks as much as possible and have become very anxious about it because you have additional health concerns.
I don't think there is a 'right' answer here, just that you need to feel that what ever you do and that you are comfortable with and feel like you can trust the doctors advice. Which is why I suggest the approach I have, rather than asking for an ELCS upfront straightaway. I think it needs to be framed as possible option to help resolve your concerns rather than what you want primarily if that makes sense.