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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

previous 3rd or 4th degree tear last time: are you having another vb?

21 replies

Ilovekittyelise · 30/12/2013 21:13

as per the title really.

i had a pretty monstrous birth (which you may have read about in various ranty threads....) with my son and had episiostomy plus 3rd degree tears (otherwise known as my front bottom isnt quite as independent from my back bottom as i would like it to be).

i assumed that further vbs would be a bad idea but my consultant (who i have so far found to be excellent) assures me that another vaginal birth poses little risk of further fanjo damage, and also that a back to back delivery is far less likely in a second labour.

i would be interested to know what anyone else has been told and their feelings about exit strategy?

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weebigmamma · 30/12/2013 21:17

I had a 3rd degree tear last time and so far I've had one consultant saying that I should think about having a VB again, one GP saying I should have a section and another consultant who seemed not to mind either way! lol. I have an appointment tomorrow and I think I'm going to say that I want a section. Weighing everything up I think it's right for me and it would be a relief not to have to worry about it happening again. I would also like a more controlled birth in general this time. x

Shellywelly1973 · 30/12/2013 21:28

I had a third degree tear with my first baby 24 years ago. Dc was born 2 years later. She was back to back & I had an episiotomy but no tear.

Dc 3,4&5 all back to back no tearing or episiotomies! Pelvic floor exercises every day & I'm fine currently on dc6...

Aquariusgirl86 · 30/12/2013 21:31

I had 2nd degree tears with vontouse with my first back to back baby, then 3rd degree tears and forceps with my 2nd back to back baby. Community midwife after the second birth said if I have another ( which I hope to) then she would recommend a c section or it would have to be a birth with a consultant present. Not sure if this is because of the babies both getting stuck or because of the tears though...

Original poster

Ilovekittyelise · 30/12/2013 21:33

hmmmmmm sounds like the bit about "back to back being a first labour issue" isnt strictly true....

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weebigmamma · 30/12/2013 21:34

Forgot to say, my first wasn't back to back but I still had the tear :-(

cravingcake · 30/12/2013 21:36

DS was forceps delivery 2 years ago, which resulted in 4th degree tear, shoulder dystocia, pph, pnd & ptsd. For me its an easy decision to have elcs this time.

I do know of one mum who had 3rd degree first time and chose a vb second time and didnt have any tears or stitches and it was a much easier labour.

sittingbythefairylights · 30/12/2013 21:39

3rd degree tear with ds1, natural delivery with ds2. Had a planned episiotomy and was actually a doddle second time round.

Original poster

Ilovekittyelise · 30/12/2013 21:45

whats pph?

sounds like you had a hideous time of it. i was very traumatised by the birth in general and am scared of dying in labour, but scared of c section too and not being able to pick up my toddler.

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weebigmamma · 30/12/2013 21:50

On another forum I started a thread about positive c-section stories because I felt I had heard enough of the horror stories. It might be worth starting one for both types of birth here to put your mind at rest a bit? I am basically going for a section after hearing the positive section stories because it made me feel much less nervous about it. Will you have a couple of week support after the birth?

Tea1Sugar · 30/12/2013 21:52

I had 3a tear, rectocele and pph, full restitch and rectocele repair at 3months postnatal as it wasn't healing. I'm 24 weeks with dc2 and 100% having a csection

katheroo · 30/12/2013 21:55

I had 3rd degree tearing with my first after back to back delivery,failed ventouse and forceps plus episiotomy. However my second i only slightly tore and didn't need stitches and it was a lovely birth, nothing like the horror of my first! 7 weeks to go to my 3rd and feeling positive all will be well this time too.

cravingcake · 30/12/2013 21:59

Pph is post partum hemorage (cant spell sorry). It wasnt litres of blood loss but enough (750ml i think) to make me feel even more shit than i did.

My recovery from the tear took longer than most people who had c-sections, i couldnt drive for 6 weeks, every check up was a drop your trousers & have a good rummage/poke about to see how things were healing and i had 2 courses of antibiotics for infection. I'd much rather have a scar that is easily accesible, less chance of infection & a few weeks of not lifting but still able to cuddle gently with my toddler. I've got plenty of support from family & friends all set up so that makes it a lot easier.

Original poster

Ilovekittyelise · 30/12/2013 22:07

i have a mild rectocele from the first birth (which is now assymptomatic due to taking various supplements).

im VERY on the fence. im scared of vb but feel very supported at the hospital (im high risk for other reasons)& there is a tight contingency in place that we switch to c at the first sight of difficulties.

yet part of me is terrified and wants a c.

if i have section its likely to be end of jan and current plan is to keep son in nursery 4 days (as he does now) until end of feb. also my husband will take leave and can work from home on fridays if need be so we have the support.

such a difficult decision.

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weebigmamma · 30/12/2013 22:11

How would you feel if it was all sorted and you had the section date? When I thought of it like that I felt I would be relieved. I hope the consultant doesn't talk me out of it tomorrow! Good luck- it is a hard decision to make. I did a lot of googling of positive stories and tried to avoid to most negative ones.

Original poster

Ilovekittyelise · 30/12/2013 22:12

cake i had similar experience re recovery time. drove after a couple of weeks but very uncomfy. and obviously the psychological scarring of that kind of trauma lasts a while (tmi alert but basically it is only now i feel like i could enjoy sex again, if i werent so pregnant; there has been no sex life since then other than day 14 babymaking sex. for the longest time i couldnt even be touched it was like id actually been raped, apologies if thats horribly insensitive to say).

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Original poster

Ilovekittyelise · 30/12/2013 22:14

good luck tomorrow weebig let us know how it goes. when are you due?

i honestly dont know how i would feel.

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TheGreatHunt · 30/12/2013 22:17

I was offered a section after my third degree tear and PPH first time. The consultant was so casual about it.

I went for a vb. had a second degree tear only because dd had her hand up by her shoulder on the way out. MW was very annoyed as I was fine until that point

I went for a vb as a CS seemed odd to me. But I'd take it if I had issues - mine were relatively minor. I'd also read that it's pregnancy that also takes a toll on the pelvic floor so having a c-section might not be a cure all.

TheGreatHunt · 30/12/2013 22:18

Also took me 4 weeks to walk 50 yards after my first. My second I was up and about immediately.

weebigmamma · 30/12/2013 22:19

Thanks! I am due on 16th April. Sounds like you had an awful time the last time. My tear healed really well but I had other problems and ended up with PND and it's hard to know how the tearing affected it all. One thought I keep having is that I am really happy with the state of my vagina at the minute and quite scared of risking anything with it now! My daughter is 9yrs old and I am quite sure that fear of the birth has been one of the main factors in us not trying for another child until now. But it sounds like it was even more traumatic for you. I hope you have a much better experience this time around xx

cravingcake · 30/12/2013 22:23

I can relate to that feeling, all your bits feel like they have been ripped to shreds and every doc, consultant, gynae etc all need to have a look. Come on over to the Ragged Bits thread in general health if you want to, theres unfortunately quite a few of us who have been through childbirth hell.

A c-section is a personal choice, and i can understand how terrified you are. Its major surgery but its planned so easier to deal with mentally than emergency. Have you tried writing a birth plan of sorts where you can list hwat you are happy with and what you are not and should then go straight to c-section? It may help you make a decision or feel more confident in a decision if you put it down in black & white (rather than the midwives & consultants just writing in your notes).

Shellywelly1973 · 30/12/2013 22:28

I realise now the implications of a third degree tear. I was very young & that , I feel was a massive factor in my recovery. I had no after care what so ever. I didn't realise the long term implications of a third degree tear.

I went on to have my other dc but in total ignorance. If I had known what I know now I would probably have had a cs.

I've beenot fine. No more tears but that's probably more luck then anything.

You need to make a decision based on your experience & needs. Hope everything works out well for you...

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