Newly pregnant..but down in the dumps

[nutcracker]

No it's not me.

My cousin is 9 weeks pregnant, but apparently since she found out she has been really moody and won't talk about the prgnancy at all.
She had been trying to concieve for about 2 years and last year had an ectopic pregnancy. She really wanted a baby, so her family are confused about her reaction. She does still want it, but doesn't seem happy about it at all.
Her dad died last year too, so i think that it could be that she's upset that her dad won't see the baby, or she's just trying to not get to attached to soon, just incase.
I said , maybe she's just thought 'oh god what have i done'. I know i thought that at some point n all of my pregnancies.
Any way, i said i'd ask you wise people, and see what you thought. Could she be depressed ??

Yes, she could be depressed. Her emotions will be all over the place for hormonal reasons, and I'm sure her father's death will have a bearing on this. Also I would have thought ttc for 2 years is in itself very stressful, and there may almost be an element of anti-climax now that she has achieved her objective? Don't know really, just guessing here, but all you can do is offer her support and a listening ear if she needs it X

I don't really know if she could be depressed.
Just to let her know she's not alone though.
I wanted dd,(even though she was a happy accident), but when i got pregnant, it took me a few weeks/maybe months to get my head around it. The ENORMITY of it all was overwhelming and i did have a good old cry at work oneday saying,"what have i done?".
I think it's only normal to have HUGE worries at first.
Now of course she is 3 (just, and i ADORE her and feel my life was so empty without her and she has made me happier than i knew possible.
She's lucky having you nutcracker
Hope she feels happier soon+

Our dd was planned but once we actually concieved it was a huge shock - as our life changed was about to change dramatically i needed up getting my self in a right tise and became very depressed.

But once dd was here it was just so perfect and now i wouldn't change things for the world.

I think to be worried with your first just means you're realistic too,not just thinking of rosy cheeks and giggles

Well I really know what she is going through - I am about 10 weeks and am fed up. I think is kind of because I can't beleive it, because I am so tired, because I hate my boss and now I will be stuck at work for even longer, I can't train to be a midwife and I am so fat. I came home the other day and cried - thinking god I so don't want to preganant. OH god seeing written down makes me feel even worse - I am so selfish!!!!

But as I said on the Sept. thread I am sure its just hormones because this one was planned and I cried before I got pregnant because it seemed that everyone else was pregnant and I wasn't getting preganant.

So I am sure your cousin like me will be fine. We will both get into being pregant when we actually feel pregnnat and know everything is alright. And once you see that tiny baby in front of you - sigh .

Thanks everyone . I think you are right. I think she is just a bit shocked at the moment. I think she thought it would never happen, and now it has, she's not sure how she feels.
I'll let her family know what you lot have said, and tell them that they just need to patient with her, and be there for her.

Hi Nutty

Maybe after trying for so long and having an ectopic pregnancy, she doesn't want to get excited just yet incase something happens? I was like that until I got to about 4 or 5 months
HTH
L
xx

antenatal depression is rather common but not talked about nearly as much as postnatal depression. One of the midwives in our local gp practice is writing a report on antenatal depresion, so hopefullyin our area at leastpeople will be more aware that it exists and recognize it in themselves & their friends when it happens. I was depressed during my second pregnancy, had some talk therapy (no meds) which worked for me. . .and then started to feel better rather spontaneously and miraculously during the second trimester.

antenatal depression is rather common but not talked about nearly as much as postnatal depression. One of the midwives in our local gp practice is writing a report on antenatal depresion, so hopefullyin our area at leastpeople will be more aware that it exists and recognize it in themselves & their friends when it happens. I was depressed during my second pregnancy, had some talk therapy (no meds) which worked for me. . .and then started to feel better rather spontaneously and miraculously during the second trimester.