Feel like I'm having a meltdown

[1muddymummy]

i think this is probably pointless but I feel so overwhelmed and I don't even know where to start. I know my DH is worried about lots of the same things so I don't want to talk to him about it anymore because he will just worry more.
I have such a lovely life and I'm so lucky which just makes me feel worse for being unhappy.

What are you feeling overwhelmed about? There's bound to be others on here who are experiencing / have experienced similar.

Join the club :( Everyone around me seems to be far more excited about my pregnancy than I am. I'm 29 weeks and can't really complain as I've (touch wood) had a fairly good pregnancy but I'm feeling very ambivalent about motherhood and more than a little terrified of the whole childbirth thing, and probably should stop reading stories about tears and subsequent incontinence etc! And I have no idea how I'll cope with the actual reality of being a mother. Perhaps these feelings are normal? I guess people only talk about them on anonymous forums.

I just can't imagine how I'm going to cope with being heavily pregnant or a baby. I know it sounds ridiculous because it's a bit late to be thinking that now but I live in the middle of nowhere, spend all day on my own looking after the farm which is starting to get more difficult physically.
I like my life and im worried im not going to be able to do anything that i do now. I feel lonely and like I have no one to talk to about anything. My DH is worried too and is being moody and argumentative. We usually have an amazing relationship but now we feel like we are drifting apart.
I'm worried about my PIL wanting to help with the baby because they foster and I don't feel I can trust them to be responsible and not leave the baby unattended. They didn't want to foster while their children were small but they don't have a problem with doing it around my child. I can see already its going to cause tension and it's making me feel stressed. My FIL is always making sly digs at me and arguing black is White just to get a reaction which is just wearing me down. usually I can take it better but right now I just can't cope.
I just want to sit and cry all the time (which is what I've been doing for the last 3 hours after another row with DH).

Yep, those are all feelings I can recognise. I've spent the weekend in bed as I've got a cold and I'm so annoyed as I had lots planned and I'm very aware that my free weekends are now numbered. I have no family here so it'll just be down to me and my partner. His parents are supportive but they aren't the type to offer to look after the baby to give us a break or anything like that whereas my own parents would always be on hand to help out if they didn't live thousands of miles away.