How much sleep in late pregnancy?

[ringaringarosy]

I am feeling (and for the first time,looking)knackered.

I would love to get to bed by 10pm but im lucky if its before 12,usually its nearer to 1.I am co sleeping with ds4 who is 13 months so i still get woken by him sometimes when he moves around in his sleep,and occasionally dd1 who is 3,too.I also have a 4 yr old and 5 yr old,so have to get them all up and ready in the morning for school and nursery.

I cant seem to get everything done,i am so tired by the time they have gone to bed-between 7-8,sometimes a little later,i end up sitting down,mumsnetting and watching tv and then i have to make lunches,iron uniforms and tidy up before i can even think about having bath or going to bed.

Anyone got any advice for being more organized/,eating foods that will give me energy/getting to sleep at a decent time?I have bags under my eyes for the first time ever,what time does everyone else go to bed?

I am managing bed by 10 but I sometimes need a mid afternoon nap too. I am 39 weeks at the mo. You must be superwoman with all those beautiful children! I would be exhausted. How far along are you?

Do you have a DP? Because if you do,he really needs to pull his finger out...

What makes you think he isnt?He cooks dinner for us all when he gets in from work at 6pm,does bathtime for them all and puts the older 2 boys to bed between 7 and 8.He does iron the kids clothes for the next day and then he actually does the morning school run with the older 3 most mornings,i am trying to do it more often as they seem better settled when i take them in (i think they can sense hes in a rush to get to work) but most days he takes them.

Genetics i am 35 weeks!They are beautiful and lots of fun,i find it difficult to get the balance right though,to get everything done that needs to be done before they go to bed i would have to be running around like a blue arsed fly,when really i would rather relax and spend time with them.

He doesnt do much housework,although at weekends he does a lot.

I was thinkingof getting a cleaner but i used to have one and i found the pre clean tidy up too stressful,and once ive actually got the whole house tidy it wouldnt take long for me to hoover and mop everywhere and clean the bathrooms and kitchen.

When DP gets in from work (4:30-5pm) he does everything that needs doing...he cooks dinner,cleans the kitchen,makes sure DD has done her homework,hoovers downstairs,gets PJ's and puts the DC to bed.
He also does all the night waking.
He leaves for work at 7am so he can't do the school run,but he does on his days off.

They don't have a bath every day,because we don't always have time.

We don't iron,I've never seen the point. (You said you have to do it,but then that DP does so I'm not sure if that's a problem or not?)

If we don't have time to make packed lunches,she has a school dinner.

If we don't have time/are too tired,we don't clean that day.(Except washing up and hoovering)

It's got to be about prioritising when your heavily pregnant and have young DC,you cant do everything and stay healthy and energised,you just can't.

It's all change here ATM as I'm managing to do more now I'm on mat leave (36 weeks) which is great,but DP has never once complained about having to do the majority of everyday stuff, because he knows its a blip,and we'll go back to 50/50 when I'm not putting so much energy into making another human.
(I've also managed to do all Xmas shopping and baby stuff shopping online whilst lazing in bed,so he hasn't needed to worry about that.)

I hope you manage to find a better balance,because either DP has to do more,or you have to lower your expectations of yourselves over the next month.

Ringaringarosy your kids sound lovely. could the older kids help out a bit more maybe? My DS who is nearly 3 is desperate to 'help' with everything at the mo. maybe the 4 and 5 year olds could make sandwiches for their packed lunches and help get things ready for school the night before? You could even try making it into a game? Or your DP could help make it into a game?

Don't worry about missing out on time with the kids a little bit. It is really hard when you are heavily pregnant. My two seem to really be missing me at the mo but I am knackered and also currently ill. They wont remember a few weeks of tired mummy and you can make it up to them once the baby has arrived.

Yes actually them doing their sandwiches would be good and they would love that,thanks.

I am preg with my first so no direct experience and not sure how you are doing all this but I have one observation.

If you sort kids and have baths and beds done, is there anyway to power through the last bit if lunches, iron and final clean so once you sit for tv, mumsnet and relaxation and start to drift towards sleep you can have a transition to bed without staying awake until 1am? Otherwise you wind down and the wake backup again?

Not sure how practical it is but just a thought. You are near the home straight now!

Last night two hours and the same for the last week. 41 weeks and sooo tired.

Op...im 29 weeks with dc6. Two of my dc have SN. My dp works rotating 7 day shifts. I often end up exactly as you describe. The effort to get up after I sit down of an evening is monumental!

When I read threads like this I admit I envy posters who dps/dhs do loads of an evening. My dp isn't hands on, he's so rarely around at bedtime- he's not familiar with the routines etc. So I often think it makes no difference if he's at home or not.

Im self employed &:work from home so its never ending. I don't know the answer! I have/ will never send my dc out in unironed clothes. I do have very high standards & wish I didn't put do much importance on things lije ironing, tidying etc.Ultimately its too my cost.

I only ever have 5/6 hours sleep but im finding it hard to manage on so little sleep at the moment.

Take care.

Shelly its great to hear from someone who also has a few children too,i have always thought my dh was really good with doing his share of the housework,maybe its because we have 4 so close together but i cant imagine him doing the cooking,cleaning AND childcare when he gets in from work,i would feel a bit lazy,maybe if i only had one older child i could just sit on the sofa and watch tv with them while he did stuff but theres always something to be done with a big family.

I think thisisfreakingmeout has it spot on,i need to power through and then relax and then try to get into bed at a decent time.

Oh well,if i dont manage to do it i guess at least i get a week or so in bed with the new baby when shes born,i always find that pretty relaxing!

People often dont comprehend how busy I am. If dp worked standard or set hours it would make a massive difference. He's been in this job about 3 years & very little prospect of getting a new job.

Ds8 is autistic. Ds5 is being assessed for autism & only on part time hours at school. Dd12 is out from 7am-5pm. She's great. I ask way too much of her. The older two dc are in their 20's & no longer live at home.

We have very little help. Ds8 gets respite from Social Services but nothing for other ds5.

I have considered stopping work but I've been building the business up for about 3 years. Im so passionate about what I do, it keeps my brain active!

My circumstances have changed alot since we decided on one last dc. I probably wouldn't have gone for another had I known how much things were going to change.

Dp was told today he will need major surgery on his bowels & intestines. The op will be in 12 weeks maximum. Im due in 11 weeks.

I will end up the only earner. Dp is entitled to SSP nothing else. I've no maternity leave organised. I will work for as long as possible & for couple weeks do as little as possible. A week in bed sounds like luxury!

Shelly - I know how hard that is.

I'm my Mum's oldest (so helped a lot) but she got left with 6 kids, one with aspergers and one with severe autism. (He needs 2 carers at all times, is non verbal and can be very aggressive).

She managed to hold down a business by herself and had no help at all from ss. All she was told was that she should put her son into residential care. It's taken his whole life to get some help for her. He now goes to 'college' in the weekdays. She also fought for years to get paid directly for his care so she is the trustee of his estate, giving her total control over his care and how the money is spent.

It's all relative (I can see that now more than ever not having had the best pregnancy) but having worked for some of London's richest parents for 18 years who constantly whine about 'not being able to cope' when they have one child, a maternity nurse and a supportive dp it always used to irritate me when I saw my Mum struggle.

Having said that I'm being all sniffy and pathetic today as I can't get out of bed and am hungry. I just don't know how people cope but I guess they do.

Reading that back it's actually garbled nonsense that quite clearly shows I've had 7 hours sleep in 3 nights lol! Apologies everyone.