Is is my Fault? Feeling low after 32 week scan

[BadFam1]

Bit of background for you. 1st baby, and have been pretty trouble free until now.
At 20 week scan was told I had a low lying anterior placenta and would need to be scanned at 32 weeks.
baby's measurements were fine and were under 50th centile for HC, and about 60th for AC and Femur length.

Went for 32 week scan today, and annoying placenta hasnt moved so will be rescanned at 36 weeks, and am now fully expecting a c section, which I didnt want.

The sonographer measured baby's growth today and raised a big concern as baby has suddenly grown massively since my last scan.

He is now off the chart and above 97th Percentile for HC and AC but spot on for Fermur Length. Est current weight 5lb 10oz. They sent me down to Maternity ward, and starting throwing around gestational diebetes and induction etc. They have booked my in for a Glucose test on Thurs and am now also being scanned at 34 weeks and seeing a consultant at 34 weeks.

TBH it has scared the living daylights out of me, and my totally unhelpful DH really upset me saying it is my fault as I havn't really watched what I've been eating during my pregnancy.
I was a little overweight when I feel pregnant (10st 10 and 5,3 BMI 26.5)
but not massively, but have put on 2 stone so far this pregnancy.

I was pretty fit before and ran regularly but havn't really done this all pregnancy apart from walking a lot, and I wouldn't say my diet was that bad. I eat fresh food, and don't pig out on takeaways constantly or anything. I have allowed myself treats, and probably have eaten more cake than I would normally (oops) but I didnt think anything of it.

It is probably hormones but it really felt like DH was blaming me for our DS being so big, and now I cant help think that I have somehow caused all of this from not looking after myself as well as I should have.
I guess a lot of it stems from really not wanting a section, and that is looking so much more likely now and It wasnt what I wanted.

Feeling really fed up :(

No it is not your fault, how dare your dh say things like that to you without any facts and when you're growing his child.

Dc2 had large measurements and was much bigger than dc1 when she was born. I did nothing different, didn't have gestational diabetes..it was just one of those things. She also had too much water..neither of these things made any difference, she is absolutely fine, just a cute little chubby baby at birth.

Hope you're ok

I have no expertise at all in this but just wanted to say that growth scans, predicted size/weight etc can be very inaccurate. I have a few friends who were told baby would be big and they weren't especially. I was the opposite - tiny bump, told baby would be small, had extra scans cause they were concerned etc. He was born at 40+2 and weighed 8lb 3 so they can be wrong. I also didn't especially watch what I was eating and had put on 2 and a half stone by the end so 2st at 32 weeks doesn't sound extremely excessive. It's so hard to find motivation to excercise especially when your bumps bigger, sore back, morning sickness and whatnot. Hopefully someone will be along with some proper advice!

Your DH deserves a slap IMO. Yes if you've eaten rubbish it could have made you more prone to GD, but it's not a given. Fwiw I've known very skinny and health-conscious women have GD, it really is just one of those things. Try not to worry until you know for sure - if you do have it, it can be well managed with changes to diet. And scans are notoriously unreliable for predicting size of baby so you should take that with a pinch of salt too.

Your husband is an ignorant prick. Gestational diabetes is fuck all to do with what you eat during your pregnancy.

www.nhs.uk/Conditions/gestational-diabetes/Pages/Causes.aspx

Sorry for the swearyness, but tell your husband to get his facts right before he decides to be so fucking sanctimonious!

(Ps I have had 2 c-sections and I think they are great! Don't worry!)

That's just mean of your DH to say that. It's not your fault. Dont be too disappointed about a c-section, it will keep you and your baby safe. And it will be a controlled one rather than an emergency Cs which has to be better.

It sounds like you are eating normally and not doing anything out of the ordinary. Your bmi is hardly high.

You really shouldn't be beating yourself up about this at all. Stuff like this happens in pregnancy - to anyone. Nature is unpredictable. It sounds like you've had a really hard day.

I thought it was in the pregnancy rule book that you have to eat cake to make up for the other stuff that you can't have.

Please don't worry.

I was in a v similar position – I actually was diagnosed with GD at about 7mths, and then had to monitor my blood sugar levels 4 times a day. Didn't change what I ate, all my readings were normal, yet the hospital still insisted I had GD. But that's another story. Anyhoo, I too had an anterior low placenta and therefore had scans at 36 and 38 weeks to see if it had moved, as well as checking on DS's growth due to the GD. Apparently his growth jumped massively between these scans and the consultant asked me what the hell I'd been eating. He then said we should 'bail out' at 39 weeks and have a section as not only had my placenta not moved, but DS was already an estimated 8lbs.

DS was delivered safely by CS at 39 weeks as planned. He was 6lb 13oz. We had nothing to fit him as he was so wee and my parents had to dash out and buy tiny baby clothes.

Moral is, these scans aren't as pinpoint as the hospital would have you believe. And as long as you know you're taking good care of yourself, you have no reason to feel guilty. Don't let this spoil the last precious few weeks of your pregnancy!

(And for the record, at my pre-op checks the senior surgeon couldn't find DS's heartbeat either, which would have freaked the hell out of me if it wasn't for the fact I could feel him moving. Hospital staff – they're not above making mistakes…)

Absoultely NOT your 'fault'
My midwife said that babies weight is pretty much predetermined from the moment of conception. Its all in the genetics.

First baby was 10 lb 6 which is 98% percentile. He is now 18 months and still 98% percentile (height and weight so perfectly in proportion). He's just meant to be that size

25 weeks pregnant with number 2, only put on 10lbs so far which is the low end of what I should be gaining. Baby already on track to be 10 lb. You can't really influence it. I know massive obese women who've had little 7 pounders!

1. GD is to do with placenta function and not what you eat. It's a pain if you do have it but not a dreadful thing.

1. Scan sizes are rubbish. I had a scan three days before my daughter was born and was told she was at least 10lbs, probably more. She was born at 9lbs 1oz and looked even smaller - the midwives guessed around 8lbs before they weighed her. She is now 2 and off the chart for height, 91st centile for weight, and is slim.

Tell your husband to wind his neck in.

I totally sympathise with you! At my 20w scan they told me my baby had a massive stomach and I probably had gestational diabetes but they would wait til 28 weeks to do the gtt. I spent the next 8 weeks avoiding sugar and treats like the plague thinking it was my fault for drinking too much appletiser in the first trimester! Anyway I didn't have gestational diabetes after all that worrying but they had genuinely convinced me I had!
Also I had low lying placenta at 20w scan, rescanned at 32 and it hadn't moved. Got my rescan next week and have slowly resigned myself to section which I also really didn't want but the decision is out of our hands. So have to look at the positives! And focus on safe healthy babies... And there is always next time for my dreamt of water birth!

No it is not your fault. I ate like an absolute pig in pregnancy, and had a tiny baby. From what you have said though, your baby is healthy, just a little on the large side. I hope you get the birth you want, but the most important thing is the health of both you and your baby. I hope things seem better for you soon!

Thank you so much everyone, you are making me feel so much better.

I guess the shock of the whole thing really got to me, and then with DH saying what he did It all spiralled into a mess!

He is normally really good, and has been lovely through the pregnancy, this was so out of character for him and seemed so spiteful.

I better go home and find the house spotless later as an apology! :)

"Yes if you've eaten rubbish it could have made you more prone to GD, but it's not a given."

That's just, well, rubbish, sorry. Amongst others, there was a study looking at whether massive consumption of sugary fizzy drinks made women more likely to develop GD. Result? Nope, it didn't. It might not be good for you in other ways to eat a high-sugar diet in pregnancy, but it doesn't make you more prone to gestational diabetes.

This is NOT your fault.

It's not your fault. End of story.

I also agree with growth scans being inaccurate. I had a 34 week scan and sonographer told me I was carrying a big baby, that she was already 6lb 10.
She was born 4 weeks later and weighed 6lb 12. She was just really long.

Growth scans are notorious for being way off.

Anyway, a while back it used to be a big bragging right to have a big baby.

Plus, what you eat has sod all to do with baby size.

Tell dh his sperm is faulty.

Not your fault... Good article on the 'large baby' phenomenon... sarahockwell-smith.com/2012/11/04/big-babies-the-curse-of-mis-diagnosing-a-macrosomic-infant-part-1/