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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Formula feeding straightaway

73 replies

Tea1Sugar · 27/10/2013 06:27

This isn't my decision I'm just wondering. If you for eff straightaway what happens to your milk when it comes in? Do you still have to pump to stop them getting engorged?

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Bunnylion · 28/10/2013 12:57

I am all for having the right to make informed decisions and it's obviously 100% mums choice. No one should be forced either way.

I'm BF and am interested to know, other than for medical reasons, why would someone choose to ff?

Please don't take that question as attacking anyone, I just really don't know why you would.

TruJay · 28/10/2013 13:23

I've always been curious about this too coz when I had my son I breasted from the start and had so much milk that I thought bloody hell where does all this go if u don't breastfeed!! I know it just reabsorbs into the body but it's just hard to imagine, I did have a lot if milk tho. I know when I stopped feeding when my son was 1, my boobs went rock hard, very sore, red hot and it was very painful! And this happened even though I had been weening him off and I was only doing his night feed towards the end. I went to doc for tablets after about a week coz it was agony, I was prescribed some tablets but never took them after reading the side effects on the leaflet, psychotic episodes and a warning not to gamble while on the tablets as u could develop a serious addiction while on the medication, I just threw them away! Very bizarre! So I second the cabbage leaves and those gel breast pads that u put in the fridge, they're fab! I don't think the symptoms will be as severe if u formula feed from the start as u haven't encouraged ur milk flow as opposed to stopping after bf but I imagine it'd be a similar thing

MrTumblesKnickers · 28/10/2013 13:23

Bunnylion that isn't what the thread's about is it? People having to justify their choices?

I'm planning to ff my second DC soon, for a few reasons I'm not going to go into here. I second cabbage leaves and very comfy clothes. I found the midwives at my hospital were very supportive to formula feeders - as long as you took your own formula with you (woman in next bed didn't and kept getting told off!).

shrieklesoda · 28/10/2013 13:43

emmac I have no idea why it happened. And tbh I never thought to ask the medical professionals. I'm assuming that I didn't produce milk, although I've been shot down before when I suggested that and told that there is no such thing as not making enough milk, and it's just an excuse for people who are too lazy to bf. Hmm Grin

daisywaisydoo · 28/10/2013 13:48

emmac3616 I gave birth in Ormskirk!

Honestly my friend scared me because she said she was ignored for not breastfeeding so I was all ready to put up a bit of a fight lol but they were lovely :) They even provided formula and you just asked/got your partner to ask when you need more.

Originally I did think I wanted to give it a go to get the colostrum in but after giving birth I was just so tired and I knew in the long run I didn't want to breastfeed so went with my gut.

If it's not for you, it's not for you. I went to baby group the other day and they were all discussing how they tried and failed/had to stop at breastfeeding or had struggled on and continued. I was the only one in the room who hadn't even tried it Blush and I did feel a pang of guilt but I know deep down I couldn't have done it for so many reasons.

Rocklike boobs for about a week I think?! I miss them sizewise Grin

Frecklesandspecs · 28/10/2013 13:53

Bunny, all sorts of reasons. I have a 2 year old and a 4 year old and for one I just don't see how I Will manage without ff this time. I hardly have enough time at the moment with dd in nursery and other things so ff would help me.
I also have things in my past which have not helped me enjoy bf . I think it has had an impact on how I feel physically - its very personal so I'm not going to go into it here.
I also suffer on and off with depression and since bf was a stressful choice for me I do not want to have that

emmac3616 · 28/10/2013 13:57

Thank you all so much, I feel much better already! I will complain if I get treated badly now, I am not normally a shrinking violet but I'm finding this high emotion / pressure. I really appreciate the comments!

Frecklesandspecs · 28/10/2013 13:57

hinder my relationship with my dcs.
The biggest readon of all is that both my dcs have thrived on ff and are awesome smart kids with no health issues.
it is a choice I am making because it is what suits us as a family at this time.

FunnysInLaJardin · 28/10/2013 14:05

I asked about this with DS2 as I was terrified of breast feeding again and the midwife refused to give me any information and said it was not an option. I wanted to avoid mastitis again and felt wholly unsupported

Frecklesandspecs · 28/10/2013 14:18

See, it is stories like funny's that just make me really mad....and the others up thread and people wonder why we get upset!

MrTumblesKnickers · 28/10/2013 14:22

Hear hear, Freckles.

Frecklesandspecs · 28/10/2013 14:54

I'm due tomorrow so will report back. I'm sure ready to stand my ground this time. I'm sure some midwives are more supportive than others and different hospitals have different policies. ;-)

Bunnylion · 28/10/2013 14:55

freckles thanks, that makes sense. I've only got one baby so far but I imagine its a lot more difficult to ebf with more kids running around.

mrtumble no need to get so defensive. I wasn't asking for anyone to "justify", I was just curious.

GinGinGin · 28/10/2013 14:55

Funnys - mastitis (when bfeeding) is usually because of poor latch. Not damning you for not bfeeding btw but just wanted to let you know.

No one should have to put up with abuse however they chose to feed their child, but at the same time no one should be railroaded into doing something they don't want to do. Women should be able to make informed choices and I don't think they are given that option.

I'm pro bfeeding but it makes me angry to see both those women who want to bfeed and are not given the support and those women who ff and are given abuse.

Frecklesandspecs · 28/10/2013 15:35

bunny, its ok. I think you can devote a little more time and energy to it with the one. siblings also get jealous at the age mine are and I want to be able to share my time equally. For me that is actually more important than how I feed.

Its like the pushchair debate. when I only had my dd I would wonder why the hell mothers put their 2+ year olds in pushchairs when mine walked everywhere. when I had dd2 I totally understood! getting on a bus with a 2 year old tantruming plus a newborn in toe isn't so easy afterall.

Frecklesandspecs · 28/10/2013 15:37

I had mastitis with dd and it is extremely painful too!

ShowOfBloodyStumps · 29/10/2013 07:37

"Its a shame there is even a debate. There shouldn't have to be. if a mother is not capabke of deciding how to feed her child without intervention or questions, God knows if she is capable of being trusted to take the baby home with her.
I find it all very patronising and nanny - state ish......"

Freckles, you've misunderstood what I mean completely. When I say there are questions to ask when a woman says how she is going to feed her baby, it's not because she isn't capable of making an informed decision, it's because every woman has a right to that informed decision and sometimes that's not what's happening. I've seen it on here many times. Women are told they won't be able to breastfeed. Their breasts are too big or too small. They're told they can't on the medication they're on. Their partners tell them they won't be involved if they don't give formula. They think it's too much hard work with older children too. Then somebody on here gives them better advice and their 'informed choice' is actually something completely different.

Some women don't want to breastfeed at all and that's their choice. And all they need say is that they've made their decision but if they feel they have no choice and they wish it was different then asking about feeding choices during pregnancy is the ideal time to dispel some myths.

I have three very good friends who didn't breastfeed. One of them is completely happy with her decision. One felt pushed into it by her family and wishes she'd stood up to them. One was told she couldn't because of her meds. This wasn't true at all and to this day she cannot talk about it without sobbing and she feels desperately upset that she was misinformed.

Bunnylion, it's a shame you can't ask that question on here. There has been the odd thread where it's discussed but as you can see, it very quickly turns into people being defensive against an attack that never happened in the first place. It's such an emotive topic and obviously if people have been hurt before they won't want to talk about it. Still seems a shame though when MN is a place where we are supporting each other and learning about how other people do things and you can't ask a simple question.

Frecklesandspecs · 29/10/2013 08:25

show, that wasn't directed at you at all. I think its good mums get the support for bf . I really do because it can be bloody hard work.
maybe I mean it should be a mutual conversation rather than a debate with equal respect for either choice.

Tiredemma · 29/10/2013 08:28

I FF straight away- my breasts were hard and uncomfortable (but not 'painful') for about 6 days. after that they were fine. Midwife told me to keep my bra on at all times (even in the bath) and to try and not let anything 'touch' them as this would stimulate the breast into thinking that there was a baby there.

It was no major issue.

Tiredemma · 29/10/2013 08:32

"Those who had decided to FF from the outset - did you write it on your birth plan / notes or just tell them after the delivery?"

Midwife asked after the birth how I planned to feed. I said FF- she asked which one?- I told her Aptamil- she said we dont have that brand here, I said 'thats fine, I have my own'

That was it.

BlackholesAndRevelations · 29/10/2013 09:09

Is there a special formula for the first feed? Just out of interest as I've seen pics of babies having their first ff in hospital from a strange looking little bottle?

Mumof3xx · 29/10/2013 09:13

Those are just the ready made bottles the hospital stock

Easier for them than washing and sterilising

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