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Original poster

NCT...is it worth it?

47 replies

Tea1Sugar · 14/10/2013 18:26

This is my dc2 but dp's first. I never went to NCT before and felt quite isolated when dd was born as I was 22 and felt in an awkward age category compared to the older mums and then teens. So in the respect of meeting local couples seems great, but is the £300 worth it?

OP posts:

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McRoo · 15/10/2013 05:39

If you think the ante natal course is too expensive, and it is a lot of money, have you considered doing their post natal 'early days' course instead?

It's just for Mums, so wouldn't help your partner, but another way of meeting people and developing a support network. I did one and actually found it more helpful than the ante-natal course and I still meet with the women pretty much every week and we exchange texts almost every day.

hazchem · 15/10/2013 08:23

If you do attend make sure you go local to you. We did ours not far from us but not local so meeting up was always a bit trek. If I'd known the purpose was to meet people as opposed to learning about birthing (that what I thought I was signing on to) I might not have bothered.

That said if you want to met people join your local branch go to the play group and nearly new sales as a helper. Loads of fun.

YBR · 15/10/2013 10:14

I found the course good, but we never "clicked" with the others there and quickly fell out of touch. Don't assume you'll make those friendships. I doubt if it was value for money in our case.
OTOH the MW/hospital provision for antenatal and BF classes here is nearly nil, so if you wanted any more than a rapid (1-hour to cover everything) session, which would be cancelled anyway if they were too busy on the labour ward, then NCT was the only option.

FoxMulder · 15/10/2013 10:36

I've been wondering about this myself. I don't know anyone in the area, but there doesn't seem to be any classes in my town either, which seems a bit odd - it's not a small town (pop. 30,000). Wondering if people from my town will be going to the next nearest classes which are about half an hour away.

Julietee · 15/10/2013 10:52

I hope they're worth it - I just paid.

Stevie77 · 15/10/2013 11:03

Bear in mind your NCT group can be a bunch of stuck up £&@*%# like mine was. Never kept in touch, contact not lasted. I think I was pretty unfortunate, I know many women make friends for life. Sadly, there are no guarantees.

londonlivvy · 15/10/2013 13:04

it depends. Some folk are lucky and end up with a network of other mums who live nearby. and they all become firm friends. sadly in our case none of the other mums on the course lived in our town (despite that being where the classes are). So instead of being able to walk ten minutes to a friendly face on a bad day, it's a 20 min drive. so we all meet once a week and exchange social niceties. They are all perfectly nice women but not friends, really, even a year down the line.

Having said that, I would take the NCT classes again, were I to go back in time, because it was worth a try. just don't set your heart on meeting best friends through it. maybe consider them as future work colleagues. and maybe one of those colleagues may become a friend. maybe.

hazchem · 15/10/2013 20:29

I'm so relieved that other people haven't become life long friends with their class. I thought it was just me.
Volunteering with my branch proved much for fruitful as I'm a SAHM so when others went back to work I had something to do.

bangersmashandbeans · 15/10/2013 22:43

Post natal classes are a good idea - sure start children's centres (think these are a national thing?) do them for free and they were brilliant and another good way to meet people.

SadFace502 · 15/10/2013 23:03

I love my NCT bunch... 7 years on and we are all still firm friends (apart from one who went AWOL).

It is great to experience all the questions/emotions with people going through the same. Lifesaver for me... But I know of other groups who haven't got on at all.

So, I would (and do) ALWAYS recommend it... Mainly because you have a ready made support network and I really missed it when I had DC2.

Runrogrogrun · 15/10/2013 23:16

My NHS anti/post natal group has been a God-send. 8 years on and (minimum) weekly catch ups - the support has been excellent. Through illness, bereavement, divorce, financial strains etc we have supported, helped, listened, partied, giggled and laughed with each other. I hope we are still friends for the next 2,5,10... years/decades...
Maybe I was lucky the day the NHS put me in that group? Invaluable friendship.
So no, no need to spend cash on NCT - just make an effort with your NHS support or other baby groups.

MuggledWoman · 16/10/2013 09:30

Yes yes yes. 3+ years on and still see most of my group once a fortnight, with kids during days off or without kids for an occasional evening out.

ch1134 · 16/10/2013 14:08

Unfortunately I didn't look up course dates until I'd already committed to a wkd away and bought train tickets, so I can't go to my very local one (walking distance) with people whose due dates are very close to mine. I am about to pay for another option, 10mins drive away and due dates a couple of weeks before mine. This all seems reasonable to me but the course is over and done with by the end of Nov and my due date isn't until the end of Jan. Doesn't this seem a bit early? Any thoughts? Thanks

Bakingtins · 16/10/2013 17:37

I'm going out with my lot on Friday - our babies are about to be seven. They were a godsend the first year.
The course was useful, my DH wasn't able to attend any of the NHS classes as they were during the day and they were far too overcrowded and short to ask any questions, and there was no question of being able to make friends at the NHS classes, whereas the NCT classes are designed to be sociable and get you chatting. I'm sure you could find out all the info yourself from various books but I think the cost is worthwhile.

FrankelInFoal · 16/10/2013 17:44

I decided the NCT classes near me were expensive (£165 for 6 classes) and the lady I emailed was quite unhelpful and didn't answer any if the questions I asked her about the class. She just replied to say she'd put my name down for the class and needed payment within 14 days

Instead I've opted for Daisy birthing classes, which are £56 (in my area) for 6 classes. The classes are for pregnant women only (no partners), which suits me fine as DH works away from home so wouldn't be here anyway. They run a special couples workshop on certain weekends, so we'll go along to that instead.

FrankelInFoal · 16/10/2013 17:44

Sorry, link fail . Trying again: Lazy Daisy birthing

JohnSnowsTie · 16/10/2013 22:05

Course wise, we didn't learn anything we hadn't already picked up from books or the net.

Group wise, nice people but nothing in common with any of them apart from having babies at the same time, so meeting up always felt a bit awkward. In hindsight I'd have been better off taking advice from friends with older children - when everyone's in the same boat with newborns it can feel a bit like the blind leading the blind. I was very neurotic with DD1 and found people who'd left the baby stage behind more "comforting"!

However I know people whose groups really bonded - and I think it's a good idea if you're new to an area and want to meet new folk.

PloddingDaily · 16/10/2013 22:25

I'm so relieved to see other people also didn't have wonderful bonding experiences - I was getting paranoid!

I can only speak from my experience: the group was from a wide geographic area, & ranged from the very snobby (actually told us in almost as many words that we 'weren't their sort of people'!) to one couple who pinched the handwash from their nhs ward 'so they could get their money's worth' . The more normal ones included natural birth & breastfeeding fascists. (great if you can, no good being demonised if you can't! )

I had a high risk, medicalised preg & ended up with pnd; at that point it seemed the cliques that formed from our original group dropped me like a hot stone. In calm, rational hindsight, and reading what I've just written, I'm rather relieved they did!!

To be fair, some people clearly do make good friends & form solid support networks via the nct, but that definitely wasn't my experience...

xxleannejxx · 17/10/2013 10:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LittlePeaPod · 17/10/2013 10:20

Hi Op I went to my first NCT class last night and if that experience is a sign of things to come, then all I can say is sve your money "it's shit". Bet thing from last night was meeting some lovely ladies.. I actually set up the following in the AIBU thread - www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/1884172-AIBU-to-think-NCT-classes-are-a-waste-of-time-money

Julietee · 17/10/2013 11:14

Here's what I want to know -

Ladies who made good NCT friends - are you naturally the kind of people who make friends easily anyway?

Cause I'm all awkward and introverted and I suck. So I'm scared I won't make friends.

JoJoManon · 17/10/2013 11:52

I have to say, I booked them purely to meet people in the same situation as we are, and so I'd have some friends when my husband is back at work/friends at work. It's pretty common where I live in SW London and most of my friends are still friends with a few of their NCT group. However, I have to be honest (and I hasten to add, maybe I am the lowest common denominator here) I just didn't really gel with my group, to the extent that I'm joining a new group so I'm hoping I'll like this lot more. But so far that £300 has been a waste of money. I am also doing the hospital antenatal classes and they are much more factual and therefore informative, imho.

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