Some consultants really suck!!!

[purple84]

Had a bad experience with a consultant today and just need to rant.

First I will explain in the last 2.5yrs I have had 4 mc (1 mmc at 12wk and 3 mc at 6-7wk) I have had tests to find PCOS, I lost 16kg and am now 36+wks. I have had a consultant briefly in this pregnancy but after a scan at 26wks never saw her again, no appointments etc, I personally didn't mind as got to stage where I can feel baby moving so have daily reassurance that things are ok, I went for for 36wk check with MW and she was concerned that nobody had signed me off or even written a plan for any treatment etc, so booked me an appointment for today with a new consultant as my previous consultant has left.

I saw MW first and she went through my notes, and she very nicely said because my MCs were early I am probably going to be signed off today as low risk now, then the consultant comes in and obviously hasn't read my notes properly as started with "so u have had 3 mc's" so I corrected her, then she starts to go through how because 3 of them were so early they don't really count as proper MC and then starts talking bout if it happens again I will get tests done, I again corrected her that I have already had tests.........why doesn't she read my notes properly.
She seems to have an attitude through the whole appointment, as if I have insisted on this apt which is obviously a total waste of her time (to be honest it wasted over 2 hours of my day)

I left the hospital crying, as anyone who has experienced a MC at any stage will know each and every one of my MC's knocked me down so hard I didn't know if I would ever get back up and having them totally belittled like that is so very upsetting, it has taken me a lot to get to a good place in this pregnancy, when I past 24wks my thoughts were "oh no if I lose the baby now, I will have to name it and go through that devastation" I have finally got to a happy place that I actually think I'm having a baby and everything will be ok (hopefully) so I don't feel that my previous loses don't count!!

I drove straight from the hospital to my DH work place for a hug, he was so disgusted with the state I was in he has written to hospital to complain bout consultant!!

Sorry it is so long and probably doesn't make much sense but just needed to get it out, thank you for reading and good luck everyone with your pregnancies xx

You poor thing. I feel outraged for you. How hard would it be for the consultant to show a little compassion? We joke on Mumsnet about the insensitivity of ordinary people but a consultant paid to do this every day should know better.
Glad your OH is there for you and indignant too!

I am so sorry you had such a terrible time. Glad DH was your knight in shining armour. Try to relax this evening.

I am so sorry for your losses and can totally empathise with you on the way people's shitty comments about your MCs make u feel.

A loss is a loss no matter how far along the pregnancy got, it was still a little life that we never got to meet! People are so bloody insensitive.

I lost my little one at 13 weeks and got a lot of "at least it wasn't a real baby" no not at all, it was a fake one

Congratulations on your current pregnancy, I too am 36 weeks with bump after my MMC and honestly could have written your sentence myself.
"oh no if I lose the baby now, I will have to name it and go through that devastation"
This is exactly how I felt and only since about 26 weeks have I started to accept I'm getting to keep this baby and like u am getting very excited now!

Good on your hubby for complaining.
Enjoy your last 4 weeks and best of luck with your little one x

Thank you everyone for your comments.

Good Luck TruJay with your pregnancy xx

How insensitive.

'It must have been very distressing to have those early losses, but fortunately, the fact that you have had early losses doesn't have a bearing on your current pregnancy' might have been a more compassionate way of relaying the information that she doesn't consider you high risk (which is of course good news!). How stupid that a medical appointment that could so easily have been about reassuring you about low risks has left you distressed and upset.

I am sorry for your losses and can identify with your worry being pg myself after a MMC.

Same to u purple, all the best x