Made to feel uncomfortable

[lolly1988]

Basically I'm due anyday now and I have my mother staying with me for 6 weeks! Problem is she's being very off with me, making comments like "anyone would think your the only one whos been pregnant" and stuff. Had a scare last week with high blood pressure and protein, and being checked again tomorrow, just want to hide in my room and not speak to anyone! What can I do? :-(

Oh dear - that doesn't sound good for you Do you normally get on with your mum? I assume she is staying to help with baby?

Is she aware of the scare you had? She should really be more sympathetic whether she knows or not but if she doesn't know could you (or your partner?) explain it to her so she knows what's happening?

Is it possible for her to come to your next check up so she can hear the situation from the doctor/midwife?

You shouldn't be made to feel uncomfortable especially in your own home so you or your partner could do with talking to your mum and telling her you are finding things hard and need as much support as possible. Is it an option for her to stay for a shorter time? Or go home until baby arrives?

Hope you get sorted x

You need to feel comfortable in your own home, if your mum is making you unhappy she should stay somewhere else. This is a really important time for you and she should behave appropriately

i'm pretty sure your mum must have had worries etc when she was pregnant, so i don't know how easy you find it to talk to her, but you really should.

Send her home? She's supposed to be there supporting you, not making you feel bad!

My mum lives abroad & was very upset when I told her that no, she wouldn't be coming over the week before my due date & staying with us for a couple of weeks. Luckily my dad is more sensible & realises that my husband & I will need our own space during this time.

Is there any other reason that she's staying with you other than you're due to give birth? If not & she contines, I'd seriously consider sending her home! Failing that, do you have a partner who can have a quiet word in her ear next time she starts? I love my mum more than anything but staying with me for 6 weeks, especially at a time like this would be too much!

Good luck with everything!!

We normally get on, not sure as she is going through the menopause and me being pregnant hormones are clashing? Her behaviour is unusual! I've tried talking to her but it seems more awkward! Not really having conversation etc. she has come back for baby (first grandchild) she lives abroad so can't change her flights, think she would take it personally too. And she is aware of my scare (but it seems she's old fashioned in a way where she's like just get on with it?? ) x

I think it's rose tinted specs - all parents forget the joys of being pg especially the last few weeks - they remember doing it whilst using a mangle etc etc etc - my (s)mother in law does it all the time, I was out mowing the lawn before dh was born... Etc ( actually you weren't as he was born on jan 2 who mows their lawn in January!! - it only took me 10 years to work that one out) - be shitty of you have to all will be forgiven when DC arrives, I get ridiculed for not eating soft/blue cheese proper mayo or pâté ( I don't eat them anyway) and not drinking ( I grew up with 2 alcoholic parents so don't drink when not pregnant!)

I find asking questions ( if you can be arsed) about their experiences helps my mil likes to be centre of attention so will blather on etc ( my fav quote from her is that her second baby fell out!!! Wtf!!)

Good luck if in doubt take to your bed and feign tired!!! ( remember when they gave birth they were In bed for a week after!! ) xxx