confidence crisis....please recommend a baby book

[cakebaby]

Totally last minute, dc1 due NOW!

So I've realised to my horror I have no idea how to look after a newborn. I was given a book by a well meaning friend, have read some of it and found it not to my taste at all. The author is 'she who must not be named' here (GF).

I'm getting conflicting advice from well meaning relatives, leaving me confused about the simplest things. So far topics of very heated debate have included.....gripe water, infacol, daily baths from birth, baby oil, baby shampoo/bubble bath, feed on demand (rod for own back etc) vs let 'em scream school of thought.

Any recommendation welcome please, something current I can either pop out and get or download. I'm thinking along the lines of 'newborns for dummies'!

Your baby week by week by Caroline Fertleman and Simone Cave. This is good because it is written by a paediatrician and contains detail on what is normal/ when to see the doctor, but it doesn't press a single Way Of Doing things. As there are lots of opinions on raising babies- as you're discovering. So my other tip is to not take tips on raising babies!!

Sorry no book recommendations but Mumsnet is probably the best place of advice on those sorts of topics.

For instance, I have never used gripe water or infacol on any of my 4 children as have never needed to.

Some children have reactions to baby oil, you might want to stay clear or just try it and see. Personally I never felt I needed to use baby oil and bought a baby boots all over body wash/shampoo for all my lot.

Daily baths are fine as long as you want to stick to it or make it part of your bedtime routine.

If baby is hungry, they need feeding. The only time I would advocate letting them cry is to establish a bedtime routine and only when they are older and to a certain level.

On all of these points though, you will respond to your own babies needs. Advice is good but I have NEVER found one solution to suit all and the best person who will be able to judge is YOU!

Thank you, I'll have a look at that one now. Thing is, all the advice I'm getting was current between 20-40 years ago! Just like all things pregnancy/baby related, everyone has an opinion and many get the hump if it's innocently questioned!

Search any question you have on Mumsnet and you will find a range of useful advice and help on what to do from people currently doing it. :) This is basically what I shall be going on, plus I've been down the library where there's masses of free info.

Whoops, x post. Thank you, I think I'm having a slow meltdown waiting for dc1 to put in an appearance....

your baby week by week - doesn't tell you what to do but tells you what your baby may be doing it each week. very good def. recommend

if your looking for more routine based one baby whisperer does a very simple routine - no restrictive but good for getting baby into a slight pattern. EASY - eat, activity, sleep - you time!

Fab, I'll take a look at that one too! Thank you

I too think your baby week by week is very good enough relevant information but not overwhelming. I would however suggest you politely ignore the weaning which I think hand based on current guidelines they start a bit early!

First Time Parent is very good - sense of humour, no agenda and lots of simple lists and advice!

I borrowed lots of different books from the library so I could get a feel for the style without paying a fortune. I particularly liked the Baby Whisperer books although not all of it. I also liked a 'she who will not be named' book about the first year (not the contented nonsense!). I liked some stuff from the 'No Cry Sleep Solution' and found the 'What to expect - the first year' interesting. Basically I read everything going and picked my favourite bits! I would also re-read them later on as your opinions will change with experience!

If you want to breast feed then I would spend some time at a bumps and babes / breast feeding support group. Talking to real people with hands on support is invaluable.

echo the week by week book - just got it and it looks very sensible. Friends have said it's just so reassuring - tells you pretty realistically what to expect when - I think the feeling of 'oh, this is normal' or 'oh, this is just a phase' must be one of the biggest steps to knowing how to address things.

Agree with other poster... Week by week was brilliant. i was totally clueless & I liked the fact that they guide you through everything, including potential illnesses / conditions to watch out for, without really having an axe to grind.

Also agree re. ignoring the section on weaning. Totally outdated! They basically admit that in the follow on book (which Ive also got).

I liked the GF book when I was pregnant as it seemed so logical, and I know lots of people swear by it, but I just didnt find it that amazing when I actually had the baby. Certainly nothing groundbreaking or that unusual.

First Time parent is awesome. With the benefit of hindsight I wish I'd avoided anything that had any form of timetable/routine as things like CLB and equally baby whisperer stressed me out!!

Babycalm by Sarah something.

The babybook by William sears

Get a factual one rather than a parenting one. I like 'your baby care bible' by dr tony waterston. It's just practical advice on baby care and milestones without the parenting crap a lot of the books spout.

With advice from others just perfect the 'nod and smile' and do what feels right.

You'll be fine!