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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Original poster

anyone else employer acting llike they really dont care

12 replies

Stom91 · 15/08/2013 17:49

hi ..im 22 weeks, first pregnancy.. my employer just seems like he couldnt care less.. my work shirts which are supplied by work no longer fit me ive asked and asked for him to order me new ones... and he hasnt so ive had to go out and buy my own which are completely different to work... my safety shoes which i have to get though work are falling apart and he wont order anymore... and in general he is just making me feel so guilty for being pregnant.. and the dorctor told me today that i have to take a week off work before i fall down. im so exhausted and could be anaemic, he said i need to rest.. but i know my employer is going to hate me and they're so judgemental.. its really upsetting me,. sorry to have a moan xx

OP posts:
okavango · 15/08/2013 19:01

Sounds horrific, follow the doctors orders! Also do you have an HR person you can speak to? You could ask for a work assessment so it doesn't feel like you are going over the boss's head.

purplemurple1 · 15/08/2013 19:08

Hi

you should ask your work for a risk assessment, it is alegal requirement so if you go to HR and just state it matter of factly - when is my risk assessment going to be done? and don't let them fob you off, and definately take any leave your dr advises you to take, and just go slower at work if you can do that safey, let others help you when you can and don't try to keep up becasue they are treating you badly.

Not buying you new safety shoes doen't sound preg related - sounds more like they are unorganised/don't care.

WhatILoved · 15/08/2013 19:22

I second getting risk assessment done urgently. Also in uk you can claim back money for shirts through the government if you have to wear special clothing for work. Google "work clothing allowance". However if I were you I would try claiming the money back through work and complain heavily to hr. Your health and baby are most important things right now x

Original poster
Stom91 · 15/08/2013 21:36

Hi. I have had a risk assessment.. Its a crap thing though and isn't cover half the stuff it needed too... No safety shoes isn't preg related just trying to point out how useless he is!! Yeah I've got to have at least a week off.. And I know people at work are going to judge and talk about me behind my back as that's the environment I work in. I can't Wat til i got on mat leave end of October!! Just making me feel so guilty for Pl being pregnant. I was talking about a friend wanting to have a baby shower for me to a college and she was like Urgh what do u think this is America?? Don't lots of people have baby showers? Xx

OP posts:
CruCru · 15/08/2013 22:37

Quite a few people do. They sound ghastly, don't let them spoil things for you.

polkadotsrock · 15/08/2013 22:41

I must confess I thought that was an American thing too really, so don't mistake that as someone not being happy for you. Your boss is probably trying to avoid the cost if he thinks you won't be around. As others have said, keep talking to hr, even if they wish you wouldn't!!

syl1985 · 16/08/2013 02:58

It's hard, but try not to worry to much about others opinions. If your employer is so totally useless then can't you report him somewhere?

Are you planning on going back to your job?
If not, can't you report your employer somewhere for breaking health and safety rules?
Also can't you tell your doctor or midwife that you just can't stand working in these conditions.

Tell them that he doesn't care about your safety or pregnancy. And if it's not possible for you to be sick or something so you don't have to go back there anymore.

If he's an ass then you can be a bitch too.
Try to get away and enjoy your extra long time off work.

Sure they might thing bad about you for being sick at home. But who cares what they think. You've got yourself and a little one to take care for. If you can't work in a safe environment (mental and physical safe) then don't go back there.

You've done your best by asking and asking again for improvements and you payed for your own clothes!!!!
You've done your best.
Enjoy your time off and ask or GP or midwife if it's not possible to stay at home from now on.

Original poster
Stom91 · 16/08/2013 08:36

Hey thanks for your advice... Yeah u would love to go off now but it's the Monday side of things I'm only 22 weeks but going on mat leave at 32 weeks if not a week or too off sick before... I'm dreading telling him today if got to have a week off resting... One person told me I look massive for 22 weeks and kosher told me that I don't look pregnant I just look like I out on a few pounds.. Charming!! Lol. And no I'm definitely not planning on going back there!! Xxx

OP posts:
syl1985 · 16/08/2013 20:09

If you are not going back there, then try to get as much time off as you can. Just take full advantage of his terrible attitude and lack of care and rules.

Have an appointment with your midwife or GP (not sure who would be best)

Tell them how stressed you are from this job.
How terrible they treat you.
What you've done and tried to make things better for you.
The safety shoes that he doesn't order for you.
Other health and safety rules that are being broken. (if he also breaks others)

Then just say that you feel both physical and emotional terrible with these work conditions. If things at work would be better you wouldn't mind working. (shows that you still are willing to work!)

But under these conditions is it not possible to stay at home? Ask him what's possible and or make an appointment with the job center and tell them these things and ask them what your rights are.

I don't know financially what kind of impact it would have if you stayed at home.

But ask around and I'm sure someone would know what you can do and what your rights are and how this financially would affect you.

Call or make an appointment with the citizens advice bureau. They also might be able to give you advice and help you with the situation.

Rules are there for a reason. Not just for your employer to brake them. He can't do that without getting into trouble.

Original poster
Stom91 · 19/08/2013 12:48

So i rang him and had to tell him I need a week off. He couldn't care less.. All he wanted to know was when I was back... I'm dreading going back. Ive been rating but yesterday I went to a family bbq I didn't do much just sat there for couple hours but that was enough I came home and never felt so tired.... If I can't even go to bbq or cook or wash up without feeling Exhausted I don't know how I'm going to cope at work .. But I'm only 22 weeks. I've still got at least 18 left
I feel like I'm letting my boyfriend down by being so tired I'm tryin to keep chirpy but it's really hard xx

OP posts:
syl1985 · 19/08/2013 15:20

No worries, being so tired it's all part of being pregnant.
And you work isn't helping you to feel any better.

I'd try to get a sick note and stay away from there.

Original poster
Stom91 · 19/08/2013 15:25

how does that work with mat leave would i end up going on it early like now? im all new at this and to top it off one of the people i actually get on with (she has be quite opinionated about me being pregnant though) has deleted me off facebook... i know its only facebook but shes obviously pissed that i had to have time off... so now that just going to make tings awkward. .. i feel really down today and fed up. i just want my baby here now it feels so far away :(

OP posts:
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