How do Mums feel about giving up financial control?

[FraggleRock77]

I'm really struggling with the idea of having to depend on my DH financially while on Mat leave. I've always been fiercely independent and equal with all costs. However in order to get a good length of leave i know i will have to give in.
My DH is fine with the idea and i suppose i should think right, my career is on hold, I'm carrying our child and will be the main carer but it is hard.
How do other people feel about it? Did it make you feel vulnerable? X

Great feed back and a real mix of replies and situations. Really helpful xxx

I had to have a long hard think about this when I found out I was pg. I've always earnt less than my husband, but been able to pay my portion of the rent, bills etc and save a little bit of money. I'm self-employed and work in a hard manual job, and the likelihood is there won't be an option to go back in a less demanding role, or part-time, after the end of mat leave. So I had to face the idea that I'd be dependent on my husband during the early years. He didn't mind this at all, but it bothered me a lot, because I felt obscurely like I was letting the side down, like I should have had a 'proper' office job with security, better pay and part-time options.

Then I had a bit of a revelation - we both have work to do. I'll be carrying and delivering our child, whilst DH will be supporting us financially. His response: 'I know which job I'd rather have.'

I'm working on thinking about the money in his account as 'ours', not 'his'.

I was always financially independent, owned my own house, funded a lot of travel, never had my parents help me out (impossible really, as they have no money). So I was very concerned about being financially dependant on my partner when I went on maternity leave at34. I was very sick with my first baby and didnt work (I was self employed) and I decided not to work for the first few months, then however, my pregnancy became very problematic and very sadly resulted in the stillbirth of my daughter. The whole financial dependency beame such a non issue in the face of such a tragedy and really his money is my money and I know I am as entitled as he is, to every penny.

I became pregnant again quite quickly and subsequently have had four dds in a short period of time. I am now a sahm, we are in a financially good position for this. I really don't want to pursue my old career and the landscape has changed so much in that time (think the emergence of social media etc etc), that I would be behind the times. I am thinking of doing a pgce. I no longer feel the need for financial independence, but in time, would like to start earning again.

I am the higher earner in my household so I saved up enough while pregnant to make up shortfall in salary. So I contributed to household bills the same as always for 10mths of ML and then DP had to pick up the slack for 2mths as I took the whole year off having only planned to take 6mths off. I didn't mind asking him to pay the bills when it came down to it but I was pleased to have saved the money so we were prepared. But we couldn't have lived on DPs earnings alone so we had to have savings.