Pregnant at 42 with 3rd child .

[Pamm123]

Hi . Just found out I'm expecting 3rd child ,unplanned . I have 2girls 5 and 7 . My hubby has always said no more and this is unplanned - he wants us terminate for the sake of our family and marriage , he cannot see any positives but I can as I'm fit and we'll and we are not struggling finanicially . I feel he is being very hard and unfair. Going to docs in Thursday .

Erm it's not for the sake of the family if you would quite like to continue the pregnancy. Only if neither of you want to proceed so please don't do this just to make him happy.

If this was his absolute worst nightmare then he should have had a vasectomy (not that this helps now) I feel for you I really do, and yes it's scary for both of you he needs to realise that a termination is a huge deal and isn't going to be forgotten especially if your hearts not in it. I think you need to talk to someone close to you that you totally trust and make sure your mind is clear. I wish you and your family all the best x

Thanks I was feeling positive until he put a downer on it. Wish he had said not keen on another but I will support you no matter what as its our baby . He is looking at all negatives , this could turn out to be a great addition to our family for all he knows .

How long since you found out you are pregnant? Maybe it was panic talking and once he sits back he will calm down a bit and realise what you do. If you don't want to terminate then don't. Does he know how you feel?

I am 45 and having a baby ths week. In our situation I was your husband but my partner was very positive. Over time I have come to terms with it fully and am now delighted to be having another chid. But it is tough to feel really positive with having another child if you think your family is complete, it took me several months. I don't think any woman should be pressured into a termination. Maybe your husband needs convincing that it will be all right, that you can have a healthy baby at 40+.

Sort of , i been avoiding big chat to give him time . I've known 3 days and he's only known 2 - Ive gone through dread and Am now hopeful and bought vitmamins etc . I'm hoping its as you say and He will come round otherwise im making him talk to doctor on Thursday with me regards options as think that will make him realise its wrong . My best mates on Hols til Saturday and then we going for a week , so that's why I've come on chat - it's my first time on thread .

Thanks , wish you well . I think it's fine if we are fit .
I'm more hopeful he will come round after reading this after all we have 2 we love already .

Wish you the best Pam, I am sure others will offer and share their experiences too. If he is a good bloke and a good dad it is bound to be the panic talking the brain solving the problem quickly without thinking it through. It sounds like you want to continue with this pregnancy so make that clear to him so he isn't under the illusion you want a termination to keep the peace. Soon the panic will turn to finding ways to make this work for you and your family. Oh and congratulations by the way :)

Did you have a chat to your husband? Been thinking of you today x

Not yet I'm having doubts myself now , head says not another baby but body and heart cannot think of terminating. In my mind it seems crazy to have another at my age and just as things get easier etc ! Seeing doctor tomorrow maybe that will help ! Big chat tonight with hubby too .

All the best xx

Just in case anyone still interested I found was going to keep baby but had miscarriage - should have been 12 weeks pregnant but baby stopped growing at 6 -8 weeks. Think nature made the choice for me and we had a puppy instead now !
Going on the pill too !