Lack of interest from midwife - questions

[Hopelass]

Just a quick question about midwives; is anyone elses a bit....disinterested? Mine is polite enough though I wouldn't call her friendly or chatty. She doesn't offer any information- I had to ask about the whooping cough jab and she has never even mentioned the exemption certificate for prescriptions/dental.

Being my first I don't know if this is normal and whether I should be a bit more pushy? It's just not my nature to be. Last appointment at 28 weeks she measured my bump for the first time but said nothing about whether it was good or bad; she didn't even write it down! She hasn't weighed me either since booking in.......
I'd love to know if she could tell what position the baby is in at the moment as I have no idea whether it is up or down!
I have my 31 week appt on Friday, any advice would be much apprecited!!

Also another quick question (sorry!). I'm 30 + 2 and really starting to struggle with my back/hips/pelvis if I do any amount of walking (i.e. around sainsburys for an hour) does that sound reasonable or something else I should mentioned to the midwife? It just starts to hurt/ache so I need to rest for an hour or so when I get home....

Thanks in advance for your help ladies; hope everyone is having a good weekend xx

I am 31 weeks and since my 28 week appointment they have measuring my bump and plotting it on a graph in my notes. They told me what it was and said it was fine.
Last appointment last week the midwife felt my tummy and told me which way baby was lying but that is the first time they have done.
Have seen different midwives at most appointment but do ask if I have questions and did mention the whopping cough jab.
I would mention the pain. I do feel I get tired walking around but not in pain so could be SPD you are experiencing.

I think you should start asking her stuff like measurements. If she did measure it should go in the notes somewhere. Mine sometimes just marked it on the growth chart, are you sure she didn't do that?

I'd definitely mention the pains and try to get a physio referral sooner rather than later.

I last saw my MW at 35 weeks and she didn't even mention anything about birth, I had to ask what number I call and when. I'll next see her at 38+1 and as DD arrived at 38+5 I thought I probably ought to have been told a little before the next appointment...

I thought my midwife was a bit like this but now she's brilliant. I think when it's your first you expect some wonderful long appointment filling you with a wealth of knowledge I did anyhow
Rather than hey check blood pressure, dip urine, listen to baby shove you out of door.
After 30 weeks my apps have totally changed she measures me and plots it on graph has a really good feel and even went through my birth plan with me. I'm quite passive but you should questioned I brought up my birth plan and she was delighted and went through it with me.
Next app is on tues and I'll be 37 week and she said she would have a good feel to see how engaged/palpable he is. 37 week felt really late for me but I think it's just because its my first and I'm clueless. Mine definitely took more interest after 35 week :)

Ask questions. My mw isn't overly chatty, but will answer all my questions in full.

I am 19 weeks and each appt gets a little more involved. My next is 25 weeks (scan at 20 won't be with her), but she explained what we were going to cover and went some way to reassuring me.

I also started getting pains, and I called the mw and she asked me what she needed to and told me what she needed to.

She also told me about a pregnancy physio session at my local hospital which runs once a month and covers common pregnancy issues and talks about excercising, plus gives you the opportunity to talk to a physio about personal issues.

It is a walk in session, so no appt necessary.

I am going next week to see if it can help! It can't do any harm.

But maybe ask your mw if your hospital runs something similar.

I had this with my mw (same for both dcs), it was like she never wanted to engage or ask me "how are you" in case I came out with loads of concerns or something.
Mine never weighed me or measured bump, and I thought 'oh well' in the end as I didn't have any concerns.
She was quite mature and I never doubted her competency which is why I stuck with her, but I do think its a shame as I had envisaged something a bit more. But I suppose I was being unrealistic and they are very busy workers!

Thanks Ladies your comments have made me feel much better! I was starting to feel like I had pissed her off in some way! It's true that I did expect a bit more involvement on her part and I will start asking more questions; no harm in it is there!?! I'll also mention about the pain and see what she says. Thanks again :)

The lady I see is exactly the same. I'd read posts from people referring to 'their/my midwife' and whilst there's nothing wrong with mine - I don't really feel especially like we have any particular relationship.

I've started to specifically ask questions now and she always answers them as well as she can which helps lead me onto further questions. She's never actively offered me any advice though or anything like that which I had expected she would do.

Oh, you also can't ask anything too medical either as that needs a doctor.

I just figure if there were any problems then she'll say.

Only complaint is that she is ALWAYS running late even if you get the second appointment of the clinic. Drives me absolutely crazy - but that's a totally different issue!!

Sluggers I know what you mean about others saying about their midwives. My friend is due anytime now and she has always raved about her midwife and the chats they have! Must just be luck of the draw I guess......still it's a shame. I hope the one/s I get in the hospital when labour time comes around will be a little more forthcoming with information with it being my first - I'll be clueless!! I suppose I'll just have to keep myself as well informed as possible just in case!

I've had a few midwives who have been perfunctory but competent. Round here they are really overbooked so I think they are just trying to keep the appts from running over. They always answer questions when asked though.

Also, they see pregnant women so much that I think they are more blasé about it than most of the mothers they are seeing for whom it is an experience they have only had a few times in their life.

Yep Tarka you're right; I try and remind myself that to her I'm just a name/NHS number and the less fuss I make the better and more on time she can be with her day however I am disappointed at the lack of information, not noting my measurements and not weighing me at all since booking which I find very odd. I'm just going to have to ask questions but I know I will forget some! At least appointments will be more frequent now.

Oh they don't weigh apart from at booking. She's following guidelines on that one. The only time I'm weighed is at my diabetes clinic.
It annoying she's not explaining things better! Do they run antenatal classes in your area? We did the nhs and NCT ones and felt really prepared for labour from those.

Ah she didn't mention that!! Fair enough then!! They seem to have phased out nhs antenatal here but luckily I'm booked in for nct classes at 34 weeks so looking forward to that and will be able to ask questions there. Thank you for clarifying the weight thing!!

We thought our NCT were great. Not all about natural birth either which was good for me as I was induced at 38 weeks in the end.