37 weeks. Self indulgent whinge (sorry)

[Mayanbob]

DC1 - so no idea if this is 'normal' and have a pretty good idea it's hormone fuelled. But this isn't as fun anymore

I don't feel quite ready for it to come out yet, but now Pg is horrid. I have enjoyed it up to now- even with SPD- which had abated over last few weeks. However, now I am just so heavy, SPD back with avengance. I am desperately trying to get flat ship shape for baby and impending in law invasion DH actually doing less to help than when I was at work eg- not offering to get me a drink- ever, not even eating lunch unless I cook it for him (am assuming because I'm off work). If I try and do anything too strenuous then the bump protests - which makes me sit down to rest -i don't want an early appearance-
and then just see the carnage around me. Was so thirsty yesterday evening but couldn't find the energy to haul my massive self up to get a drink. Then had to get up 100 times in the night because of discomfort and wee needing. Was also woken by DH coming to bed at 2:30am!!!

Plus my left nipple really hurts sometimes.

I realise this is all probably just par for the course. But I'm just finding it a bit hard the mo and needed to offload. Thanks for listening.

Mayanbob sympathies and hugs - sounds like DH needs a word about how you feel and how tired you are! If he was a bit more supportive it might make all the difference - especially of his relatives about to invade! He might not realise you rough it is.

When you say bump protests if try to do anything strenuous what do you mean? I ask because I moved house a week or so ago and nothing is ready but my energy has vanished and I have to take a break constantly! I'm interested on how people know not to overdo it. I'm 34.5 though so more growing to do :-/

Rest. Rest. Rest.

Screw the housework, honestly.

Make up a massive jug of squash, put it by you on the sofa and watch crap on tv or read a book. My baby is 4 weeks old and came at 38 weeks, I wish I had spent less time worry about the chores and more time relaxing.

It all pales into significance once they are here ... I couldn't care less about my dirty bathroom when he is sleeping on my tummy

Agree with rollermum, let your partner know how you feel, they can't read minds, he probably doesn't have a clue x

Just coming out with a whinge in sympathy! If it helps, my DH is being brilliant but I'm still fed up and miserable and want it to be done with. I'm nearly 36 weeks and have swollen hands and feet, about 3 items of clothing that actually fit comfortably and am getting zero sleep due to the heat/my bladder/back and hip pain. I hate not being able to move freely; everything is a massive effort and I seem to spend half the time waddling around with a full bladder whilst having braxton hicks. Not a happy bunny right now.

But, yeah, definitely tell DH you need more help, and I hope things improve for you soon x

Thank you lovely people!! You are all right of course- DH is not a mind reader. I also think I needed some perspective as to that it isn't the end of the world if I don't get sorted - thanks lockie

rollermum bump protesting is possibly Braxton Hicks. (No resl clue) Doesn't feel particularly contractiony but more like I've been winded by being punched to the stomach. (No pain- more like pressure) Seems to occur if I over-exert myself.

ladysnapcase^ misery does love company- and knowing it's not just me has helped plenty. I hope you feel a bit better soon

Have an antenatal class tonight with DH so will mention the exhaustion after that.

Hey, I am due any day now and can really sympathise with you. This is my first pregnancy and I am fed up with people (mostly people who have not had babies) going on about how amazing it is. I have felt so miserable during pregnancy. I hate not being in control of my body and miss the freedom (and glasses of wine) that I had prior to this. And despite this I too am not sure I am ready for baby to come out either!! Contradictory I know but that pretty much sums up how I feel about my whole pregnancy... blah.
Is it me or is there this expectation that pregnancy is going to be amazing -certainly I never had that expectation but trying to convince non-pregnant/childless friends (pretty much all of them) that it is anything but wonderful is met with gawps and comments that friends they know that are pregnant are enjoying it...great makes me feel a ton better..not! Pregnant and friends with children seem a lot easier to talk to... I don't have many of those hence why I am always posting on here!

I am also having major cravings for cake and sweets that I just can't get over - I swear I have been eating more sweets and cakes this past few weeks that I did in the entire first and second trimesters - I am a bit worried about weight gain and 'nutritional' stuff etc but I just cannot say no when these cravings kick in - cake tastes too amazing...hoping that is normal? I know I should try more but have been so healthy for most of this pregnancy I feel that maybe its not the worse thing in the world to have a bad couple of weeks cake wise.

Am also a bit worried that if I am hating pregnancy now what is it gonna be like when the baby is actually here :S - anyone else have that feeling and for those that did and had their baby did any of your worries about not coping or hating motherhood materialise? People keep saying that having a baby is the best thing to happen etc but I just really am having my doubts that this will be true for me after finding pregnancy so horrendous.

Sorry to hijack your post Mayanbob hope your DH sorts himself out as he should and supports you more.

Hi RatherUninspired Sorry about delay in replying. Have suffered had the great in-law invasion.

I too have developed a sweet-tooth that has hitherto been dormant. But I think it fell short of a craving -had to do a GTT which came back negative but did kick me into shape a bit.

I must say I don't hate pregnancy, but I do understand where you are coming from. I think I am fortunate in that most of my female friends do have babies, and one of them certainly did hate pregnancy so I haven't felt the pressure to love it. However, it certainly becomes annoying when you say "I'm really tired" and are constantly met with "Well, just you wait till the baby is here" - YES, but I'LL HAVE A F*ING BABY.

Try not to worry, I think being in the latter stages of pregnancy is also a huge anxiety hike (as I have also found every scan to date). It certainly is for me. I'm currently wondering about what I actually do with a baby, and also thinking that maybe this is something I should have researched/ learned beforehand, and that i'm potentially a terrible mother for not doing so. Then I remember that actually I am quite a capable (comparatively to some other people at any rate) human being, and have no reason to think that I will suddenly be worse at being a mum than I have been at anything else. I also know that I have a lot of love in me to give,and if I love this baby then that is a pretty good place to start.

I'm sorry that I can't speak from previous experience with this being my first, but I do understand where you are coming from. I am sure you will be a wonderful mum - and don't forget that a little human that you live with is a lot different to some unknown entity that is inside you, heavy, crampy, winds you every now and then and means that you can't "just lie down" without contemplating the least uncomfortable way in which to do so. Although there will be feeds and nappies to navigate.

Good luck for the birth- when are you due?? Please keep in touch on here. I'm so sorry you are having a bit of a hard time with it, but it is kind of nice to know i'm not the only one. So thank you for that

DH update- Turns out it needed an antenatal class for him to snap into gear. Not only am I able to delegate activities (although I still hate doing so), but when all his family came round he was definitely on my side in the face of all kinds of "advice" being offered from in-laws. So today my hormones deem that he is a good guy and so I won't have to kill him. But thanks for your eyes? ears the other day.

I am 39 weeks and totally get it. The last bit seems endless and constant hard work, physically. I also hated those 'wait til you have a baby' comments with my first! When my baby came I didn't experience tiredness in at all the same endless, frustrating way as I did when I was pregnant. It had purpose at least!

Btw I didn't do any reading about looking after a baby til it was handed to me and I thought crap, maybe I should have read into this more! But you will pick it up really quickly, you don't need books (you will be plied with advice from well-meaning older people anyway!).

ahh thanks Mayan, I am due.... TOMORROW! What you put about being a person who is capable etc helped. I should remind myself more often I have always been able (not without holidays and stress) a job, I have a degree and own mortgage, loving friends etc etc it's just hard sometimes as I feel so overwhelmed by this new experience. I have always been one of those people who finds change of any sort really terrifying... not sure why just naturally quite cautious. But, although annoying I have a husband who is like a rock to me. I must say I am really tossing and turning in bed, really restless now and actually quite nervous/sometimes excited but mostly just want to get to the part where I actually have a baby! I have tried to be honest about my negative pregnancy experience so that maybe others might not feel alone but I do hope I don't regret this too much. Hopefully the next pregnancy (if there is one) won't be as bad as I will know a bit more what to expect!

Posy - I have done some reading but I am now saying no I am not reading too much unless I want to. I felt I 'had' to which didn't help. I think if you enjoy doing it then go for it but if it's a drag maybe its a sign that you need to concentrate on other things/what ever makes you happy. I mean I don't understand how a book can teach you that much about what seems like such a practical/individual occurrence (having a baby and caring for it) - surely the only way to learn is through experience/making mistakes - I know this logically but if it's any consolation I still don't 'believe' it and do kick myself up a bit for not reading everything I have bought/found on parenting and baby stuff.

bit of a random analogy I just thought of though (trying to convince myself - still on the books) is that I used to dance a lot as a youngster and I can tell you that reading about dancing never helped with any routines or competitions. The only thing that helped was PRACTISE, PRACTISE and guess what...more PRACTISE... (still not convinced though :p)

I am 38 weeks and really hating the last weeks! even being sick for 5 months wasn´t as bad as this!

I think feeling tired just looking at my toddler, being unable to walk to the toilet in the middle of the night without pain etc is all a cunning plan to make the actual birth seem less frightening and something that needs to happen NOW

rather I am excited about your due date. And I think your analogy of practice is just about right. It's a baby... there is only so much reading you (when I say you I mean me) can do. At the end of the day it's a little person and practicing getting to know each other will be the thing.

Good luck with the birth!