unplanned 1st pregnancy scared

[puggywug81]

I just found out I'm 5 weeks pregnant. This is totally unplanned. Until last year I was adamant I didn't want kids, my opinion has gradually started to change but I was not planning anything, my oh is in his 40's and I'm 32, he isn't sure he wants to be a dad at this stage in his life, our house is a work in progress, we aren't rich and I keep swinging between thinking a pregnancy will ruin my life versus a termination will ruin my life. My mum was not very maternal and I'm scared if I have this baby I'll be the same, any opinions or advice would be much appreciated as I'm confused and terrified!

Thanks heffalump it's hard not to try and control everything!

Preaching to the choir!! I am the biggest control freak going, and I have had to really work on that throughout this pregnancy. There is so much you can't control, the changes in your body, the progression of the pregnancy, the things that may or may not go wrong, etc etc. The way I have forced myself to look at it is that each new thing is something for me to get used to, and I give myself time to do that.

You will be just fine, just don't be hard on yourself for the massive emotional ups and downs that are to come. An unexpected pregnancy takes away the opportunity to plan and prepare for all this, so don't be surprised if it takes you a while to get your head around it. It definitely did for me! Good luck, I'm sure you will be just fine. If I can do it, so can you!!

Another person who was in a similar position, unplanned, my oh lived in Scotland I lived in Cardiff but we didn't find out until I was 12 weeks, so decision taken out our hands, move forward a year and we are living together, married and currently have a snuggly little 6 1/2 month old monster on me. It really is the best feeling in the world! xx

Thankyou ladies it is so good to hear your experiences, only my OH knows yet we have yet to tell anyone else so it is great to have people to share this with.