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Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Original poster

So i'm sitting here crying my eyes out

57 replies

CryingGivesMeAHeadache · 10/07/2013 18:14

I am 17 weeks pregnant tomorrow and i'm having a bit of a melt down.

None of my clothes fucking fit and I have no money to buy new ones. I don't have a job and am living off DP's wage which is pitiful.

I have been looking for a job for over a year, applying to everything from cleaning to office admin and nobody will employ me. Pretty much given up now as no one will take on a pregnant lady.

I hate myself tonight. I feel fat and horrible and alone. DP works 5-7 days and other than him I don't know anyone in this city despite living here for 4 years.

How the fuck am I going to handle raising a child if I have a melt down over clothes?

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
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Signet2012 · 10/07/2013 19:07

If you get bigger than an 18 I have some 20's bits and pieces including a pair of never worn linen trousers.

Original poster
CryingGivesMeAHeadache · 10/07/2013 19:09

i've now run out of tissues and loo roll, just to make this day even worse Sad

I think everything has got on top of me today and I have crumbled. I'm usually so controlled with my emotions.

I just want to eat crisps and chocolate and icecream but we have none of that and we have spent this weeks food budget already.

OP posts:
Original poster
CryingGivesMeAHeadache · 10/07/2013 19:14

What sort of dress is it jacques?

pm's you rat

Thankyou for all your advice guys. I had forgotten there were nice people out there

OP posts:
dirtyface · 10/07/2013 19:14

aww i was like this when i was pg with dc1 :(

(((((hugs)))) to you

and also agree with others re have a look for some pregnancy groups, i think most sure starts have them. they would have been a godsend for me

another idea is netmums meet ups

but keep posting here there is no end of support x

Original poster
CryingGivesMeAHeadache · 10/07/2013 19:20

I just feel so useless.

DP's parents have brought us everything for the baby which is lovely of them and has helped us out a great deal but it seems to be all anyone is bothered about is the baby. I am a person too, not just a grower of their grandchild.

I haven't felt baby move yet and i had horrendous morning sickness and now none of my clothes fucking fit. Where is the fun bit of pregnancy? Where is the mystical glow people talk of?

OP posts:
badguider · 10/07/2013 19:30

You need to get out and meet other pregnant women. I go to a yoga class that is "pay what you can" for people without jobs. Call your MW and ask them.

valiumredhead · 10/07/2013 19:32

Do you want the truth? I had very few fun bits in pregnancy BUT when I felt d move for the first time at 17 weeks it was incredible and suddenly made it all seem real and I was able to focus on the end goal-the babyGrin

Everyone has hormonal melt downs, don't worry. It will be worth it I promise but I do think you should have a chat with your mid wife xxx

PurplePidjin · 10/07/2013 19:37

I think my "glowing" stage started at about 20 weeks, but i didn't fully relax until after the 24 week mark when i knew there would be medical help if something happened. I now have a newly-crawling 8 mo fast asleep in his cot in the next room, and all the pregnancy details are a bit hazy Blush

Have a rant at dp, let it all out and let it go. It's normal to feel like "Carer Of The Baby" instead of "Pidj" and the odd tantrum reminds people of that. I throw the occasional one at my mum and she takes me out for cake :o

It's true about the social whirl too, i had 3 invitations to the beach today - that's more than the whole of last summer!

Original poster
CryingGivesMeAHeadache · 10/07/2013 19:37

I haven't met my actual midwife yet though. As it's a clinic at the dr's surgery then they have a different one each time. Apparently my Midwife is called Melissa, but I have been seen by a Sarah and an Amy so I have no idea who this Melissa woman is...Who would I ring? I only have a number for emergencies.

OP posts:
TinkyPeet · 10/07/2013 19:39

Aw honey :( huge hugs. You are in quite possibly THE worst stage for hormones and hissy fits and 'everybody's against me' meltdowns, they don't last forever and you will start to feel more like yourself soon I promise :) text your dp and get him to being you some chocolate home, get yourself in the bath for a lovely soak and watch a crappy film xxx

tabulahrasa · 10/07/2013 19:42

I didn't find anything fun about being pregnant, I was just fat and uncomfortable and even the baby moving felt a bit odd...I liked my DC fine when they were out, but being pregnant was just something to endure to get to that point tbh.

And, I once had a full on snot streaming crying fit because I ran out of tomato soup, rofl.

Original poster
CryingGivesMeAHeadache · 10/07/2013 19:44

tabulah Grin

I recently had a full on hissy fit at DP for offering to get me a glass of water. I think he is a bit sick of my hormones recently, poor bloke.

OP posts:
Original poster
CryingGivesMeAHeadache · 10/07/2013 19:48

Just rang DP and he is now coming home instead of going to the cinema and is bringing icecream with him and has said we can watch a disney film. I don't deserve him sometimes.

OP posts:
ThreeEyedRaven · 10/07/2013 19:56

Bless you. If its any consolation I'm 6 weeks in and feel Luke a bag of shite.

Your DP sounds lovely Smile

Hope you feel better soon, enjoy the ice cream Grin

Original poster
CryingGivesMeAHeadache · 10/07/2013 19:57

Oh I don't miss being 6 weeks. I will take meltdowns over clothes to constant vomiting any day Grin

OP posts:
ThreeEyedRaven · 10/07/2013 20:02

Grin I'm very glad to hear 17 weeks is an improvement on 6!

ratbagcatbag · 10/07/2013 20:40

My glow started at 32 bloody weeks and dd arrived at37+4, I don't even finished work and missed a surprise baby shower :( mind you love her to bits.

I do mean it, as I'm in notts too I'm happy to meet for a walk round arboretum or cheap coffee in mcd's etc.

dirtyface · 10/07/2013 20:46

OP do you think you might be a little bit depressed?

it does sound a little bit more than pregnancy blues :(

i had depression real bad when i was pg with my first. maybe have a chat to your MW or doctor?

Original poster
CryingGivesMeAHeadache · 10/07/2013 20:51

I have suffered with depression in the past, so I guess it might be rearing its ugly head again Sad

rats that sounds lovely, just need to get my ankle better first Sad

OP posts:
Original poster
CryingGivesMeAHeadache · 10/07/2013 21:56

I started feeling better and now I've come to bed the tears have started again. I look so horrible and fat and there is nothing I can do about it. Sad

OP posts:
OneForEachHand · 11/07/2013 00:22

I remember feeling that way, too. I even refused to go out at all a few times with DP because I felt so disgusting and nothing fitted. It's so difficult when you're out of pocket and feel lonely, but as others have said, get yourself to some groups for pregnant women and have a look around charity shops etc. It will get better and soon you'll have a lovely bump to show off!

Futterby · 11/07/2013 00:38

I have a few things you can have, I think. Not much right enough, I'm in a very similar situation to you so I can really sympathise, I got four amazing tops and three awesome dresses from a charity shop yesterday and it came to £13.20 so have a hunt if you can :) I'm normally a 14 (fellow short-arse here too Grin) so I've really not got much but I've also got some stuff a friend of a friend gave me that's just too big and not really my style, so you're welcome to them too if you like.

So sorry you're having such a tough time Flowers

Futterby · 11/07/2013 00:39

I seem to have misplaced my full-stop button. Sorry about that, it's really bothering me now Grin

babyhmummy01 · 11/07/2013 08:51

crying I felt exactly the same st your stage and also have s history of depression. Ring your GP surgery and ask for midwife appt or for one of them to call you. They really can help!

I am not a million miles from nottingham, if you need s friend to chat to pls pm me. Xxx

knittingirl · 11/07/2013 09:03

Crying, I'm in Nottingham too, if you want someone to get together for a coffee and pregnant lady natter with I'd love to :) I'm working full time at the moment but will be going on mat leave in 2 weeks (I'm almost 34 weeks) so will be around in the day then. PM me if you'd like to get together, sometimes pregnant lady company helps!