Timing of booking appt?

[ceara]

I am currently (if all's well in there still) 9 weeks pregnant. I told my GP at 7 weeks after my IVF pregnancy scan, and was referred to the practice midwife (in my area referral is via your GP). I'd thought the norm was for the booking appointment to take place at 10 weeks; DH and I assumed we'd have the chance to discuss the options for antenatal testing with the midwife then, ahead of my 12 week scan. But I've now been told that in my area the midwives don't arrange a booking apointment until 12 weeks and that my scan will probably happen first. Apparently I have to give my consent for any antenatal testing I want over the phone this week and the midwives then book me in for the scan etc.

We haven't given much thought to our choices yet as this is an IVF pregnancy and I never expected to get this far, and it still seems like tempting fate to think about it while we're at this fragile early stage. I am having a private scan next week to check if all is still well (we saw the heartbeat 2 weeks ago, but I was having some spotting) and we didn't want to think about the 12 week scan or antenatal testing until after the second scan. We had also wanted to get information and advice about testing from our midwife, face to face - DH in particular is very opposed to me randomly Googling for information which experience suggests is the path to madness!

So, currently feeling both rushed, and a bit abandoned, by the system locally. Please tell me, is this because I am a neurotic fertility patient who is used to regular appointments and handholding, and needs to get a grip?!

Also, as it seems we are going to have to be self-reliant about finding information on our choices and the pros and cons, any recommendations of good reliable websites to go to would be gratefully appreciated.

I reckon the best course for now is going to be to consent to everything to keep our options open, on the basis I can change my mind when I get there (I assume....)

I told my GP at 5 weeks, had a 'prebooking' at 8 weeks and a scan/booking at 12 weeks . They had me consent to any tests I did/didn't want on the day of the booking appointment as I had to sign forms saying I didn't want any that I didn't want. I turned down the downs syndrome test as the first part is a measurement taken on your scan and then blood test and if they think you've a high risk they do an amnio...i knew id refuse the amnio so no point in the other bits really!

They can't do the tests without you there anyway so if you aren't sure on any ask to talk it through in person on the day would be my advice .

I'm now 17 weeks tomorrow and I move house so next Thursday I've a new prebooking and a new booking on the 2nd July! Oh the joys!

Good luck with everything x

I agree with chilli, just think about what you'd want to do if you had the tests and they came back 'high risk'. Only you know how you'd feel about having a child with chromosomal abnormalities, or about the risks associated with invasive testing (if the blood test/scan came back high risk you'd be offered amnio/cvs which have a small risk of miscarriage). you and your dh/p just need to have a good think and discussion. To be honest at the booking appointment, I was just given a basic leaflet and asked what I wanted - dp and I had already discussed and decided before then (we declined testing too, for the same reason as chilli - wouldn't have amnio and would only worry knowing I was 'high risk'). The screening only covers a small range of conditions too - anything else should be picked up at the 20w anomaly scan.