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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Pregnant after MMC, someone please hand hold me!

45 replies

fluffandnonsense · 19/06/2013 18:24

I had a MMC in April at 14 weeks. Very devastating and have only really got over it. We started trying again straight away and fell pregnant straight off the back of the MC. Did a pregnancy test couple of weeks ago and again yesterday and both positive. Beginning to feel rotten now too which I know is a good sign BUT I am so so worried something will go wrong again. Every time I think about the fact that I'm pregnant all I feel is fear. Fear that it will all happen over again, that I won't be able to stay in control, that if it does happen again ill give up and stop trying. The docs are happy for me to have an early scan but I'm crapping myself as it was at the scan I found out last time. I feel really irrational and hormonal.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

marmitelover · 25/06/2013 22:04

Had my scan today 5weeks, 6 days and most amazingly the tiniest little heartbeat imaginable! So, really trying to focus on the positive and not worry too much about what there is still left to go wrong. Of course, I'm still freaking out that the dates are a bit later than I thought (is it not growing properly?!) and that you can see a heartbeat this early and still miscarry etc etc etc

The EPU were great though and said that I can go back in any time for a reassurance scan if I want. Think I would prefer not to unless I have a reason to worry or else it would feed my neurotisms.

Tiniest glimmer of excitement now lit though. Really hope everyone else has good news too x

Original poster

fluffandnonsense · 26/06/2013 08:09

That's brilliant news marmite so pleased for you xxx

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PurplePest · 26/06/2013 11:51

Aw that's great marmite!

fluff I had my first 'gag' moment this morning and some pins and needles in my hands and arms last night...completely different to the last two times. No sore boobs either! You are so right though - there is no guide. Each pregnancy is different. Sounds bad but I need to get it out there - I'm not enjoying this stage of pregnancy. I want it to be over...the 12 week scan is my hurdle...

Original poster

fluffandnonsense · 26/06/2013 13:19

Purple I'm exactly the same. The first 12 weeks are an endurance test for me. I'm always relieved when its over! I think that what's hard getting pregnant so quickly again, I've pretty much been pregnant and in the evil first 12 weeks with just a 2 week break since January. I feel exhausted, physically and mentally. I think this upcoming scan may just tip me over the edge!

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PurplePest · 26/06/2013 13:46

Some big hugs winging their way over to you fluff...those first 12 weeks seem to take forever to pass and due to the two MMC's I've had and the bad news delivered both times, I really am cacking myself (already) waiting for that 12 week scan again...I'll be a wreck in the run up...

Being pregnant is hard work! No wonder you / we feel the way you / we do! I had my MMC mid-February and wasn't expecting to fall pregnant so soon! Of course, I am over the moon about it but gosh does it play with you! A physical and mental rollercoaster!

I'll be thinking of you on Saturday...

marmitelover · 27/06/2013 11:42

fluffandnonsense
I had a scan on Tuesday ... and there was the most amazing, tiniest little heart beat. Obviously still bricking myself, worrying about all the things that can still go wrong (and yes still on knicker watch) but it was awesome to see. Am now 6+1.

The EPU were great - said i could go back any time I wanted some reassurance and have another scan. She seemed to totally get why I was so scared still. Good luck on Sat!

marmitelover · 27/06/2013 11:44

Such a muppet... thought the message I posted on Tuesday hadn't loaded so now I've done it twice. Sorry! Can't work out how to delete it. Such a loser.

PurplePest · 27/06/2013 12:09

So glad the EPU were great and looked after you marmite. Makes all the difference doesn't it?

marmitelover · 27/06/2013 18:47

Yes, a huge difference purplepest. Hope it goes well for you next week. I had a mmc at 11 weeks so I need to get that far before I can feel this one is going well. Every change in symptoms - worse or better - just set me off worrying again. Still not sure if I will go back for another scan before 12 weeks. Told myself I wouldn't unless something changed but not sure I have the willpower!

PurplePest · 28/06/2013 11:32

I know exactly how you feel marmite...I'm the same - paranoid about every niggle and every change...and then trying to work out or google what it might be. Do you think we'll turn ourselves bonkers?!?! Nervous about Tuesday already! I spoke with the bereavement midwife yesterday that looked after me both times before and she totally got it and I felt so much better and a little relieved after talking to her.

Original poster

fluffandnonsense · 28/06/2013 14:30

I've been a total wreck all day, can't stop crying. I feel like I've coped well with the miscarriage and just got on with things but the thought of having my scan tomorrow and potentially being put back into that 'dark place' is sending me slightly do lally. I've got my kids today too so I'm just trying to avoid them so they don't see me getting upset. Feel so stupid :(

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PurplePest · 28/06/2013 14:48

Don't feel stupid fluff...big hugs for you from me.

It's hard with kids isn't it?

What you're feeling is perfectly normal...remember, scans don't hold all good memories for us hence them almost tipping us over the edge. Our hormones are all over the place, anxiety, worry and general 'getting used to being pregnant again' all adds up to emotional ladies!

Cry when you can - you can't help feeling like you do - and let it out. And think of the most relaxing way to spend the evening...

What time is your scan?

Original poster

fluffandnonsense · 28/06/2013 15:05

Thanks Purple. :) Scan is at 1:45 so I have all morning to send myself loopy, also my husband can't come as he is going to be away which is making me feel worse :(

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PurplePest · 28/06/2013 15:14

Can you plan something for the morning? A little bit last minute I know...

Totally understand feeling re hubby not being able to come. Can anyone else go with you? Someone you're close to / can trust?

Original poster

fluffandnonsense · 28/06/2013 17:57

Luckily my mum is coming with me (I say luckily because she's going on holiday on Sunday so only just in time!) I'm hoping she will say come over early and we can go out for a while in the morning. Really don't want another day sitting and stewing about everything

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Original poster

fluffandnonsense · 29/06/2013 20:29

Little bean is alive and kicking!!! Measuring 8+2 and a lovely strong heartbeat. I couldn't be more relieved

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angusandelspethsthistlewhistle · 29/06/2013 22:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

marmitelover · 30/06/2013 19:50

fluff great news! What a relief for you.

PurplePest · 10/07/2013 17:39

That's just fabby fluff! So pleased for you!

We have another scan tomorrow as we're much 'younger' than we thought - last weeks scan measured 5+1!!! Have got my dates sooooooooooo wrong! Off to EPU again tomorrow as last weeks scan showed tiny, slow heartbeat (which I was told is perfectly normal at that early stage) but at least there was something to see this time!

marmitelover · 13/07/2013 19:55

purplepest great news about heartbeat. It's amazing that they can see these things isn't it?

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