Just one thing!

[Tulipsandbuttercups]

If there was just one thing, that you wished someone had told you about before the birth of your first born what would it be?

lou x

Don't over think every tiny thing. Babies are very resilient, most of the stuff doesn't matter one bit. Take time to live in the moment and enjoy them!

That you need to stand up for yourself and your child no matter what.

Take wetwipes or moist toilet paper into the hospital.
You will need them for you when you do your first poo. Sorry, TMI, but I WISH I had been told this.

Not me, but DH.

I wish I had used the time during my 6 hour labour to pass on to him the fact that a baby with meconium in the waters - like DS - would be likely to be whipped away once born for a stomach pump before being handed over. I knew this as a friend had experienced similar.

The look of complete fear on his face as they shouted "Get a paediatrician" was horrible. I don't think I have ever seen that look on his face before or since.

Watching with interest (and packs wet wipes for me)

Spend less time focussing on the pregnancy and more time focussing on what you do once you get your baby home!

Also, less critical but a good plan- if you are like me, and filling your freezer with meals, try to avoid soups as they are very hard to eat safely while holding a squirmy small person! Stick to stews and other not-too-spilly things that can be eaten with a spoon.

don't try to wallpaper the bedroom whilst recovering from a c section and a screaming 8 week old! - surrender to the fact that you can't do a task from start to finish, stop, cuddle and leave that stuff for later.

Babies change so quickly and will eventually grow out of (most) challenges, whether colic, teething, feeding. You'll then face the next set of challenges but I found that thought very comforting when dealing with a colicky 8 week old.

what snowflake said.
don't sweat the small stuff.

Don't catastrophise. One bad night does not mean your child has colic and will be wailing for the next 3 months.

Newborns do not feed on a 3 hourly routine. I apologise to all the other mums in the post natal ward who listened to my screaming child who 'couldn't possibly be hungry'.

Follow your instinct, pretty much ignore what others do and say (aside from proper guidelines of course!) as what works for their baby might not work for yours. You'll find your own way through. That and don't expect to do much for the first fwe weeks apart from enjoying cuddling your baby :)

Babies don't need 'outfits'. They just need vests and babygros, you won't want to faff around with tights/shirts/jeans when they are very little.

Ooohhh quite a few, don't over buy on newborn clothes as they grow out of them too fast.

Sleep and rest as much as you can before baby comes cuz if you have a long labour you won't sleep and the 1st few nights of having a baby you won't want to sleep anyway.

It's nothing to worry about when the 1st 12 hours your baby is throwing up something that's a funny colour (I thought there was something really wrong and couldn't sleep and kept calling the nurses lol) it's normal.

To accept as much help as people are offering as the 1st week is really hard.

You might progress faster (or slower) than 1 cm per hour

You don't have to have a vaginal examination ( to check dilation) if you don't want to.

I went in because I wasn't coping with the pain - I got examined (1cm!) and sent home - in the time it took to drive home and turn back and get back (40 mins) I dilated to 4cm. I was in a lot of pain and very scared - I feel like I might have had a slightly different experience (and a lot less stress) if I had been given some gas and air straight away.

that first babies aren't always late and to pack my hospital bag before 35 weeks...

Yes, I'd just buy babygros. All my newborn 'outfits' were wasted.
I still at 9 months don't like putting jeans on my pfb I like soft fabrics

I wish someone would have told me the following (maybe they did and I just didn't listen!!):-

The blood after the birth would resemble a horror movie. I nearly passed out from the sight of the blood when I stood up for the first time. I am not even a little bit squeamish normally but I could not believe the amount of blood that came gushing out.

You can't eat soup with 1 hand.

You will only have one hand to eat with or do anything else. If you a right handed, your free hand will be the left one!!

Buy plenty of little snacks that you can just pick up and eat.

Breastfeeding makes you hungrier than you have ever been in your life.

Get a subscription to Lovefilm or Netflix.

You will be more tired than you have ever been in your life (I know everyone tells you this but I don't think you realise how little sleep you will actually get).

Coffee & sugar are your best friend in the first few weeks. You can worry about your waistline at a later date.

People will arrive at your house whenever they feel like it.

Don't bother with newborn clothes other than sleepsuits. They won't wear them.

Muslin cloths are amazing. Make sure you have plenty.

Buy some bottles and formula, just in case. After 3 weeks of breastfeeding, I sent DH out at 2 in the morning to fetch bottles, formula and a steriliser because I couldn't take the pain anymore.

Speaking of pain, stitches in your hoohaa REALLY HURT!! I found the pain from that worse than labour and birth.

Good luck!!

Oh and in labour when you get to the point you think you will die.... It's nearly over

That yes, they can need feeding again already,even though you've just fed them and got them into a clean nappy and slerpsuit. And that yes, they will then vomit that feed back up all over themselves,you and the duvet.

Have the visitors that you want in your home, that are helpful and hospitable, don't be feel like you have to have inlaws at your home straight after delivery. Especially if they expect to be made tea and dinner

Your hospital bag may look big, buy trust me you will need everything in it, even baby milk if ff and nappies as the hospital only provides baby's first nappy. Remember socks, socks are good, your feet will get cold during labour, oh and remember magazines as labour can take a long time as can going home.

Don't pack pre-pregnancy clothes, they won't fit, like i did with pfb!
Do pack joggers/leggings and floaty top to wear home, your uterus may not go down for 3 weeks.
A nice towel is also good, and a robe.

Make sure you state your requirements for pain relief as soon as you get to hopital or they will fob you off with, it's too early/it's too late

Remember this a special time in your life, this is your baby, don't allow ils or other fam members to take over as you won't get this time back again.
My previous births were all clouded by the ils, stating what they want, taking over. This time i know not to allow it & allow them to take precious moments away from me.

You'll need sanitary towels in a range of sizes (starting with feckin huge) for post birth blood loss. It'll go on longer than you think but it does stop. If you do too much however in the first two weeks, it'll go heavy again in a scary fashion

It's a lovely love thing to have naps with your newborn in your bed, just do all the safety reading & planning, then you can properly snooze

Have a load of things you can eat with one hand ready

Pâté & blue cheese are as yummy as you remember

Sleep! Just sleep whenever you can! Try to sleep when the baby sleeps, when your DP/DH has the baby, get the GPs in so you can sleep.

Because it really takes quite a while before you will get another full night sleep still waiting for it

That the first 6 weeks really is all about constant feeding, constant nappy changing and cuddling.

I didn't fully appreciate that after feeding DS1, he would need feeding again 15 minutes later. You cannot overfeed a newborn baby.