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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

I am 15 and pregnant really need advice please!!

35 replies

cpz522 · 20/05/2013 02:47

Well I wasn't sure what else todo other than get some advice from other moms or mommy-to-be's I'm only 4 weeks along so not far at all but I'm scared... My boyfriend is being very support and I am a very lucky girl to have him... I don't know what to do, someone please help me.?

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
CouthyMow · 20/05/2013 03:43

Yes, you WILL have to grow up, fast. Hiding being pregnant isn't being grown up - if you want to keep the baby you WILL need to step up over the parapet and tell people, and he prepared to accept that they may have a negative reaction to start with.

It probably wasn't in amongst your parents, or your partner's parents, to have you becoming a parent at 15/16, and it WILL take them time to readjust their expectations. Give them that time, a time to yell and cry. 9 times out of 10, family comes round once the baby is here, because your baby will be their family.

Don't expect your parents to offer to help with the baby - it would be nice if they offered, but don't expect it. You won't BE a child any more, once your baby is born, so they will have finished raising you.

ONLY keep the baby if you know that you can cope, and support the baby yourself, without the help of your parents, as they may not want to help, AND without the help of your partner, because he may not be able to cope himself.

If, and only if, you can get a back-up plan together yourself of away to self-support you AND your baby, then make a decision to keep the baby.

You need to understand that life as a young parent is incredibly difficult, far more difficult than being a parent at a more 'usual' age.

While your friends are going off to college, going out to parties, you will be looking after your baby. Your baby might not be happy to settle for anyone else but you, not all babies can be left with sitters.

When you are a slightly older parent, your friends are at a similar life stage, and once you have children, your social life revolves around play dates, soft play, park visits and baby groups. It's not quite the same as going partying.

You can't just go on vacations either. Or if you do, it's not the kind of vacations your friends will be going on.

I know I'm making it sound bleak, but I want you to REALLY consider every angle. I didn't. I love my Daughter with every fibre of my being, but there are still, even now (possibly more so, as I look at my DD and realise just how young I really was when I had her, how much of a child 'playing at being a grown-up' I actually was...) pangs of regret over the things I never got to do.

You also need to consider the more serious side of having a baby. How would you manage if your child had some form of disability? Would you be able to cope with a severely disabled child?

My DD has LD'S and other health issues. It's not been an easy road, but I knew right from the start that I would be able to keep going, even on my own.

First things first, you need to start taking Folic acid. NOW. Whether you decide to keep the baby or give the baby up for adoption, you need to give your baby the best possible chances. And the first 12 weeks, it is important for your baby for you to take Folic acid supplements. You should be able to buy this in a drugstore.

You also need to get your prenatal care sorted out.

These are the first things that will show people that you are serious about this, and have thought about everything.

I am here to chat to you about anything that you are worried about, or might need advice about.

I wish Mumsnet HAD been around when I was pregnant at 15!

sitzonhandz · 20/05/2013 03:46

If you had a miscarriage (or what your cousin thinks might have been a miscarriage) a month ago, you may not be pg. sometimes it takes a while for your cycle to regulate again.

That said, false positives are uncommon.

Hip surgery shouldn't impact your ability to carry the foetus, however, without knowing what hip surgery you have had, there may be a necessity to have a Caesarian section instead of a vaginal birth. You would need to discuss with your ob-gyn, as it's unlikely that childbirth within a short period was taken into account at the time of your surgery. When were you supposed to be back on the cheer team? You may also be more likely to suffer from pg related hip and pelvis pain - but again, it depends on your injury - it may be the complete opposite if you have great muscle tone as a result of being so fit!

cpz522 · 20/05/2013 03:47

Thank you so much'!! I'm sure I will be messaging you a couple times needing some advice. It easy talking to someone who's been through want I'm
Going through even if I don't know you personally sometimes that's even better. I do think I'd be able to take care of my child even with disabilitys

OP posts:
cpz522 · 20/05/2013 03:50

We just started cheer again last week. My
Hip surgery was a reconstruction of my labrum. Shaved off some extra bone and an illosoas release. I may be released again to so things this Thursday. So I need to figure out for sure before I start cheering and hurting myself or the baby.

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CouthyMow · 20/05/2013 03:53

Did what you think might be a miscarriage happen after the surgery?

How long ago was it? If it was only 4 weeks ago, it could be that you aren't pregnant now - it could be a false positive if you have retained some 'products of conception' from last time.

A visit to your GP is good.

And if you aren't pregnant, then get your contraception sorted out. Depo obviously isn't working for you - it didn't for me either. And you and your partner are obviously not great at using condoms. Try the pill, or a Mirena coil. And if you are pregnant, then hold onto that thought until after your baby is born - and get it sorted BEFORE you have sex again after the birth.

The last thing a very young parent needs is two babies to look after when they are so young. I had a 4 year gap, and that still wasn't enough!

CouthyMow · 20/05/2013 03:56

I think that you maybe should speak to a ob-Gynae ASAP. Cheer leading is quite 'high-impact' exercise, isn't it?

I had to give up my beloved horse riding and Judo when I was pregnant with my DD. I had to choose between the health of my baby, and my hobbies / sports. Baby won! Wink

cpz522 · 20/05/2013 04:01

Haha yes my baby would
Definitely win too... If I go to the doctor to Oreos will they I ly give me a urine test or can I specifically ask for a blood test?

OP posts:
sitzonhandz · 20/05/2013 04:02

If you aren't pg, don't just try again until you are, honestly.

This isn't something you need. It's something you can cope with if it's happening, but this is NOT something to strive for. It really isn't it. Get your education finished.

cpz522 · 20/05/2013 04:07

I agree!!! I don't want to
Try to get pregnant at all.. I
Do
Want
Ida one day but not now unless I have no
Choice.

OP posts:
Tortoiseonthehalfshell · 20/05/2013 04:09

cpz, you're in the US? I think doctor's procedures will be quite different there, doesn't it depend on insurance and whatnot? So we can't advise you about blood tests etc. You can certainly ask for a blood test, I don't see why not.

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