A bit horrified at the midwife appointment

[Blankiefan]

So this is my first pregnancy and I had my 12 week apt (although I'm 13+6). I've not had a lot of dealing with the NHS before so don't know if this is unusual / something to complain about or if it's just what to expect...

First of all, sonographer was great. The baby wasn't co-operating but she took her time and did all she could. She was v. knowledgable and explained things well. She couldn't do a nuchal fold measurement as the baby was in the wrong place - which obviously wasn't her fault.

Then I saw the midwife. Dear god. First of all - would she have been an actual midwife or some sort of admin-type person? She seemed to have little knowledge other than what was written down. She couldn't explain the extra blood tests that were needed or what the consequences of results might be. She didn't seem to be at all on top of any of the detail (explained that appointments wouldn't be confirmed in writing then backtracked later and said they'd have to be as timings were to). She kept getting confused ("ooh, i keep forgetting my words today") and was all fingers and thumbs (sending a big pile of leaflets onto the floor for me to pick up). When i asked about the need to keep taking folic acid (I'm on the higher dose), she said I should - she couldnt explain why and when I pointed out that the prescription said to take it until 12 weeks, she explained that the letter to my GP had been a misprint that has been needing fixed for ages! During the session, two other midwives "popped in" without introducing themselves to me (until midwife 1 did after several mins - but never explained why they'd come in) - the other midwives got involved in little bits of the consultation (one answering a question that MW1 couldn't; one taking bloods). They very much seemed to be checking up on MW1?.. Surely if MW1 couldn't do it, then she should've been supervised throughout? It was very disorganised and I was left with no confidence at all in anything she was saying. All in all, she seemed very scatty and I had no trust at all in her competence

Please tell me that this isn't the person who'll be delivering my baby?

I'm really concerned about the advice / service I'm getting. It's already started having consequences - for example. At my booking apt, we explained that we'd had a private early scan that dated me a week earlier than my last period did. This was ignored and the scan booked for today. Given the lack of NF measurement, we now only have the blood test to inform us about the Downs risk. If we'd had this apt last week (as our private scan dates suggested we should've), we'd have had time to book another private scan to get another chance at the NF measurement...also, I wasn't told to go to today's scan with a full bladder (which I suspect made the sonographer's job more difficult and less successful...)

So - what do I do ? Suck it up or complain / expect more?

I can set your mind at rest about one thing at least: the chances of the mw who did your booking appointment delivering your baby are pretty low unless you're at a tiny rural hospital.

As for the rest, sounds like she want a great mw, but I wouldn't complain unless you keep getting her and there's no improvement. Sometimes they've been up all night attending a home birth and some people come across as less knowledgeable than they are.

It's normal to see the midwife at the booking in appt here as they don't offer separate appts. We got a scan and booked in at 10 weeks and nothing else as they don't offer nf testing.

If you get the same mw again or are confused by anything ask to see someone else. You need to be happy with your care.

Unfortunately, I agree with the last post. I'm due dc3 and I'm afraird my midwives have only started to take an actual interest in the last stages each time. Sadly, I think they are often stressed out and over worked and if you are even just a relatively straightforward case they just wave you through. My worst was the clinic with dd1 where we (expectant mums) all sat in a waiting room with a leaking roof and a scary old style matron would ocassionally open the door and bark 'next!' for your appt! (usually over an hour late). There always seems to be a huge problem with not seeing the same person twice and therefore messages not getting carried on.

Anyway, my moan doesn't help. If there are any important questions I'd ask your gp. I've been lucky enough not to have to use the NHS pre pregnancy so it has been a bit of an eye opener! Don't panic, they should be on the ball when there's a baby actually coming out of you!

She sounds like my midwife. I read the notes mine had written down after my booking appointment and amongst other errors (my name spelling, place I'm going birth, husbands phone number), apparently my due date is 31st Dec 2014. I am due August 2013.

But my appointment with her was at my gp before my scan, are you positive this woman was a midwife and not the receptionist or admin person?

If she was then you can ask to be allocated to a different midwife, your gp surgery or hospital can arrange this. Although I'm not happy with my midwife, I'm not going to change myself because she won't be the one at the birth and I've got the most important info from NHS online an books. All she does is take my blood pressure and weigh me every few weeks. I find put when to book these appointments online. My scans and bloods are at my hospital and they've all been great. But if I had any health problems during my pregnancy that meant I required more help from her then I'd probably ask to change.

Hi op, sorry you have had a rubbish appointment. A2 my twelve week scan last year the administrative nurse on duty was horrible to us - even after the sonographer had told us the baby had passed away. She bit my head off several times about my maternity notes not being in a folder, which I hadn't been given, and then got really shirty when I asked what would happen next. Got the impression she felt it wasn't her job to explain and she just wanted me to push off and cry somewhere else. The job must be very frustrating, the roman who went in before us lept having to go outside for fag breaks and was loudly swearing at the nurses, but I promise you, my midwife now is in a different league. Blunt as a brick in the face, but definitely knows her onions! Shame about your nf test, but legals if the blood flag anything up they will get you in again quickly for another scan.

Arghhhhh sorry about my typing! Woman not roman...and maybe they will scan again, not whatever rubbish I put!

One of my 3 midwives (tiny rural hospital) was the scattiest person I've ever met in real life. She was also the only person who could get my baby to BF or eat anything at all. She was an amazing baby whisperer and a massive tower of strength to me.

Some midwives have funny skill sets

Sounds like the midwife I had at booking apt to be honest, she would have struggled to do a basic admin job which was effectively all she had to do. Completely scatty and unhelpful. As previous posters have said though I'm just hoping I don't need much to do with her as isn't actually assigned to the hospital - yours might be the same.

Thanks for the perspective. Looks like it's not uncommon.

It's a large hospital so hopefully I'll get someone else as we progress.

Looks like I'll have to buckle myself up and ride it out....

My booking in apt seemed to go well with all the fact finding. It was a midwife but she didn't go into much about the pregnancy with me just told me to make an apt at my gp for my midwife at 16 weeks.
Then at the 16 wk apt I saw a lady who I hope never to meet again who told me off for not labelling a water sample that I had just done on my way in and asked why I had brought it with me!
She then told me she wasnt my midwife but just covering, she then proceeded to tell me I should sign numerous pages in my notes. Upon reading these pages the lady at my booking in should have discussed breast feeding and she had ticked a load of wrong boxes and put wrong medication down for me!
At my 25 week apt I then saw another midwife at my GPs who said she was again covering, however she was absolutly lovely explained loads of stuff and asked me lots of questions. I just hope the other midwifes I meet can be as nice and thorough as her.

Sounds like my booking in midwife too. Didn't understand a word through her thick Spanish accent and she made lots of mistakes. I haven't seen the same midwife for any appointment and all have been better than her. There is hope!

This full bladder thing - I live in Germany and we always have empty bladders here for all scans - I don't know if the equipment is any different but just thought I would mention to put mind at ease there. If you are concerned re. down there are other tests such as Harmony test that can be done - other ladies have posted on here about it. On the folic acid I was just told to take it for a bit longer (and def. after 12 weeks) etc and have done so - there is evidence this reduces risk of pre-ecalampsia by taking in the second trimester. The study on asthma was a tiny tiny sample - and it is very unclear how they managed for the other risk factors other than folic acid. That said there is some science behind the study looking at developing lung functions (later stages) and how too much folic affects that. But I think this is for the third trimester.

What other blood tests were you worried about? In case this helps you - the main ones I have had are. - Iron, Thyoid (mine is hyper), Toxiplasmosis (you pay for this in Germany but it is routinely offered), GTT (full one - routine in germany, I am no risk and healthy range BMI), but if you have GTT - it is some way to do with baby size, but also to do with placenta abruption, and this can lead to still birth etc - baby cannot go over for this reason and yes there are people who are ok - but this is the known risk with it - my BF - also no risk of GT and healthy BMI actually had it and was induced to ensure she didn't go over, and this was in Germany). I also have urine, weight, BP checked every 4 weeks. I think there is so much info out there, and it is terribly overwhelming, you are bound to feel a bit anxious, partic with such an odd appointment! If concerned I would book another one with your GP and just write down a list of stuff and go and ask them quite honestly, saying you are there based on the folic acid and checking about that. It will take them 5 mins with you - but would no doubt put your mind at rest?

Congrats!!!

At my booking in appointment, I went home with paperwork for a four year old boy called Samuel. No idea how that happened. I am not male, 4yrs old or called Samuel.

At my twelve week appointment with NF test and anti-D results, I went home with the blood info for a 41 year old Asian lady. I am so pale skinned I am borderline Albino. To be honest, I was more pissed off about being mistaken for 41.

The midwife who screwed up was very scatterbrained, but still. If you start being assertive now, they'll need to answer your questions properly and you'll feel much more assured.

And congratulations, btw.

After saying my midwife was ace, I was stupid enough not to check my notes between the booking in and 12 week scan. I have had my head in the sand because last year we lost a baby at twelve weeks...that is my excuse for not reading them!

Anyway at the scan I was getting some very dodgy looks and raised eyebrows, until the lady at the scan dept desk finally asked me what illegal substances I had taken during pregnancy. My midwife had ticked 'no' in all those boxes - diabetes, heart disease, etc etc etc, then inexplicably ticked yes for drug abuse during pregnancy! Then in the notes box she had written 'registered drug addict'. I am not. I am a primary school teacher who had the occassional glass of cider before trying to get pregnant! I was so angry...can't wait to see her at 17 weeks!

Incidentally, she also got my partner's forename and surname wrong, which meant more raised eyebrows from him!

I don't think this was actually a midwife you saw, it wouldn't normally be a midwife who would take the bloods after a scan. I have no idea who she might have been though! I hope your booking appt was better than this and that things improve from here.

BeQuick that is horrendous !!!!!

please report back after your next appointment

I've always suspected they make the most incompetent midwives do the booking in clinics to prevent them doing any harm elsewhere. I've genuinely felt at times that I know more than them, the same with some community midwives.. However, the ones on the delivery wards have always been great.

MrsSpagBol I hope she knows anatomy better than she can fill in forms! I really don't know what she was thinking, and if she really did think I said I was a drug user, why didn't she tell me to get some help?!

Mariana you might well be right there. Last time I spoke to my treasure she said it probably wouldn't be her at the 17 week appointment, as she is possibly going to be 'redeployed'.

At my 12 week scan I saw maternity support workers who took my bloods and did height/weight etc.

Saw a community midwife for my booking appt at 9 weeks which was at a local health centre. Sounds like she was probably a support worker and should really have advised you to speak to a midwife if you had questions.

Hope you have more success at your next appt!