I feel horrible and guilty for being fed up at being pregnant. I just feel exhausted today and have a terrible headache with dizziness. Also have a UTI and horrible Thrush due to the antibiotics.
Feel bad for taking it out on OH who is getting fed up of my grumpy wallowing. He's going out tomorrow for a friends birthday and I feel bad that I'm annoyed coz I don't want to go to the pub looking and feeling like a misery guts and not being able to have a drink. I get quite anxious around these friends already and although I rarely drink anyway its usually the only way I can relax in this siuation. The fact that no one knows I'm pregnant at this stage makes it even more awkward. I've said I'm not going and asked him not to get drunk but he got a bit shitty and said he would get drunk but not overdo it, which upset me more. The last time he did this I ended up wiping his mouth as he repeatedly threw up in the loo and was generally an unpleasant drunk.
To be fair to him he doesnt go out often at all and has been looking after me the past few weeks and working really but can't seem to keep in check my grumpy sulking and I hate myself right now. I'm fed up of being lonely, ( my friends and family are not local at all) sad, sick and angry and just know by tomorrow night il be feeling even worse.
So really ladies, how do I keep my hormones in check and stop being such a bitch. I want to chill out but keep periodically flaring up with annoyance. its stupid and not fair but I just don't know what to do with my time without OH while he's having fun and I'm stuck feeling crappy. 