I am alone here at home (kids in child care today) and need some company but of course everyone is at work or busy being busy. I don't know how to help myself feel better. I hope I am on the right forum and that someone may have been where I am.
I am 8 weeks pregnant with DC3, DC1 and 2 are under three. Freaking out yes. However, I had a scan at 6 weeks and there was no heartbeat so its more than likely there is no live baby in there as I am a complete train wreak, particularly today, crying over the most stupid things. Not to mention crying because of all the things he has said to me when he's angry.
I'm currently convinced he's going to leave me because I am so emotional and he is more likely to tell me I am mad or crazy when it comes to emotions than give me a hug.
I'm waiting for the required amount of time for another scan to see if there is a baby or not. If there is then I will freak as this house is too small and we're already fighting over space. He's promised to get a bigger house for at least 2 years but can't decide (yet does have the money). I of course have little say in this since I am the SAHM trying to do the best by the kids seems to give me no power in anything else. What wil have I done? Will the kids still have a mum worth having if I am to divide my time around yet another set of demands on me.
If there is a no baby then I'll be happy or sad?? Will my hormones kick in and trick me into thinking that I need another baby.
I know everyone who has three will explain that they would never be without their third child, and naturally that makes total sence.
I am just a mess. Sorry.