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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

8 months pregnant + sex ! advice needed plz (long post)

1 reply

RachaelH1983 · 21/03/2013 14:29

Hi,

I am 32wks pregnant my partner + I have always had a brilliant sex life but just lately we have gone from having a lot of sex to maybe once or twice a week. I've always been a bigger person so never been overly confident and being pregnant + getting bigger hasn't helped that. I've noticed he isn't so keen lately so have mentioned it a few times + he just says he is slowing down !!
I have a high sex drive and he knows when I'm in the mood and lately that's just gone un-noticed. I usually go to be between 10-10.30pm I have a 7yr old so I'm up early getting her ready for school, then go fodd shopping, come home clean up+do the washing etc so by 10ish my bed is calling me.

Last night I went to be about 10.15pm my partner knew I was in the mood but didn't wanna come to bed as it was to early which I thought ok and off to bed I went. I was laid in bed + could hear him putting the laptop on, I knew instantly what he was doing, I came down stairs and made an excuse that my lips were chapped so wanted my lip balm, he was acting all shifty I knew dam well he was watching porn on the laptop, I got my lip balm + went back to bed feeling so pissed off + hurt that he knew I wanted him to come to bed + he was sat downstairs on the laptop instead !! I lead there for a while thinking what to do/say + I decided to take him a quilt down + tell him to sleep downstairs as I knew what he was down here doing, he didn't denie it I walked back upstairs + got in bed, 5 mins later he is in the bedroom asking me what my problem is... I told him he knew I was in the mood yet he'd rather sit infront of porn than come to bed, I also said I'd noticed how distant he had been with sex lately. He then decides to tell me its becuz my bump gets in the way yet 9 times out of 10 we do it doggy style so it doesn't get in the way. He told me he loves me to bits + that I'm being silly but I really felt upset that my needs no longer matter. We was having a cuddle earlier and he made it clear he was in the mood, I told him to jog on when I want it he sits down stairs watches porn + has a wank yet when he wants it I'm suppose to jump at the chance. I have been a right stressy bitch these last few months I know that + I know I'm hard work when I am moody but am I wrong for feeling how am I feeling ???

OP posts:
Fluffeh · 21/03/2013 16:33

I wouldn't say your feelings are wrong, everyone is entitled to feel however they feel.
Up until around 6 weeks ago I had quite a good sex drive but now its just not comfortable. It doesn't mean I don't get in the mood, its more the thought of how the sex will actually be (awkward, uncomfortable etc) puts me off.
Maybe for your partner its that which bothers him? If you can talk to him about it may e you can suggest time together but avoid penatrative sex? I know my bump gets in the way if we try and it doesn't really matter about position - the bump is everywhere lol.
I can understand you being annoyed at the porn it's totally understandable. Maybe he feels awkward having full sex knowing the baby's size and general position? Or maybe he worries it might start labour? In your position I'd try and have an honest but non confrontational talk with him about how you're both feeling.
Hth :)

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