Scan tomorrow- Partner wont come

[NoVictim1]

Tomorrow is my 20 week scan and partner wont come. We find out what sex it is tomorrow. He really wants a boy to carry his dads name on. We already have a daughter and he says he doesnt want to ruin the experience because he will initially be disappointed if its a girl.
But it will ruin it for me anyway knowin i have to deliver the news if it is a girl.
Should I make him come? Is he being unreasonable?

Been thinking of you, really hope your scan goes well today.

I was thinking, if he doesn't care about his wife and unborn child enough to come along and support you, perhaps you could find out the sex but refuse to tell him? At least until he realises it doesn't matter either way?

If anything should be wrong that comes up today (god forbid) he will wish he had been there, and certainly wish he hadn't been so focused on something as unimportant as gender.

Hope your scan went well and your partner did go with you in the end, if the baby does end up being another girl there is a lot of information about gender preference online, it's very common.

I think gender disappointment is very real and need to be taken seriously and talked about openly. However, it is NOT acceptable as an excuse not to support you during the 20w scan.

At my scan they asked us if we wanted to know the sex. We said yes, but there was the option to say no if we hadn't wanted to know.

Thanks so much for your concern :)
My mother has never seen a scan before so I invited her to come with me. DH wanted to come in the morning but I just didnt want his stress and I wanted my mum to experience a scan. I already have a daughter with DH so I know he is a fabulous Dad.
I am having a boy!! So as you can imagine he is beside himself with happiness but I will now be making him pay for all the additional and pointless stress he put me through.
He would have loved the child regardless, he even told me this but after loosing his dad to cancer he was adamant he wanted a boy to continue his fathers legacy which is also a cultural name. There is alot of history to it but really I couldnt care less, as long as the baby was healthy. I dont think you can have the luxury to ask for sex either.
Ill be making him pay.
Thank you all for being so kind xx

I'm glad it all went well and I bet your mum was chuffed to bits. And yes, a few breakfasts in bed wouldn't go amiss...

So glad it went well - congratulations!

Well he sounds just delightful.

Having experienced bad news at a scan and being told our baby wouldn't survive I am quite frankly appalled that anyone could be so shallow. Poor you.

I'm glad that nothing was wrong at the scan and that you got to share the moment with your mum :)