1 week overdue and feeling hopeless

[iamwhaticallpregnant]

Hi all. I was due 7 days ago wth first baby. I am finding this really hard. I know i should feel lucky that my baby is safe and well - especially when u read about tragedies on here.
Please dont tell me oh well at least youll only have 7 more days to wait. Please also dont tell me oh youll be sorry when the baby arrives and youll wish u had free time again. Cause im sick of those responses.
I can just about last through the day but by the evening just sit and weep cause i cant stand it. Im so heavy and sore and sick and immobile and anxious. Every minute.
More than that - i feel like something must b wrong with me because he hasnt come out naturally? Why hasnt labour started? I don't want him to be forced out! I want to have him naturally. I dont understand why this hasnt happened.
Im probably being pathetic but i suffer badly with depression and have massive anxiety about giving birth and i just need it to be done.
Does anyone empathise?
Please also no talk of curry/sex/pineapple/caster oil etc. It was funny 3 days over. Not now.

I totally sympathise. I'm one day behind you (40+6) and I'm absolutely convinced my body will not go into labour spontaneously. I've an induction booked for Monday, which I really don't want - but the alternative is to stay pregnant even longer!! Talk about Hobson's choice!
I am so bored with my own company that I nearly burst into tears umpteen times yesterday. I'm sick of needing a hoist to turn over in bed, of sleeping apart from my DP (I'm REALLY not a pleasant bedfellow at the moment), of having fuck all to do and of feeling grotty all the time - not poorly, just grotty and heavy and unable to do much.
Hope it's all over for us both soon xxx

Don't forget that your due date is calculated from the first day of your last period. Therefore pregnancy is medically counted for the two weeks before you actually ovulated and conception can take place up to a week after that. The due date does not mean that your baby is literally due on that specific day. It is a useful medical shorthand, it is not set in stone.

Hope you feel better soon. Waiting is the hardest part. Good luck x

Oh, my sympathies. I was 8 and 9 days over with my two. It's miserable isn't it?

There is nothing I can say at this point that will make you feel better. Every day just feels so hard.

If you feel you need to talk to your midwife about your depression, they will listen. Or anyone else you can talk to?

In the meantime, coping tactics. Try and think of some treat you can have every day - something to look forward to the next day. Doesn't need to be big. A swim. A favourite magazine. A massive bar of chocolate. Just that little thing that's good about tomorrow can be a help whilst you are waiting. If you like swimming I found that particuarly good with no 1 as it takes away a lot of the pressure and weight. I didn't even really swim, just sort of wallowed about in the shallow end and did a length every now and then.

If you can afford it, some reflexology or a massage can be really recharging. Or if you have a partner, just a nice foot rub with some lotion.

A nice nap in a sunny spot to make up for the sleep you aren't getting at night.

Also, if you want some pro-active tips, you could try some of the exercises on spinning babies to help him/her into a good position.

Good luck. It will be over soon, even though every hour feels like a century at this point.

You are not alone! I'm not even due yet (due friday) and i'm losing the plot. I bloody hate being pregnant anyway so being so close to the finish line but with no indication of where the line actually is is torturous, i really am fed up. I went 5 days over with my ds so i'm resigned to the same or more. Doesn't stop me wishing every minute for labour though! It sucks.

I've decided to go and visit my sister tomorrow, 45 miles away. I'm hoping to tempt fate and will take my notes with me!!!

I agree with Amanda - treat yourself every day. Something nice to get you through.

It IS just a matter of time: at some point this will end. So you need to try to make the time as pleasant as possible.

I took myself swimming every morning during the last week or so of my pregnancy with #1, and then bought something yummy on my way home for lunch, then watched a trashy movie/napped in the afternoon. That way I also only thought it blocks of time - rather than "I have to get through the next week", I just thought "I'm doing X for the next two hours".

And there is nothing wrong with you: you have created and grown a healthy baby!! That's an amazing thing for you and your body to have done.

Babies don't have calculators or calendars. Most babies are born within 10 days of their due date, so you're still well within 'normal'.

I know the advice to treat yourself is good, but I've been off work for over 4 weeks now and TBH there's nothing else I want to do!! I've done it all. I'm spending my time making a real meal of the littlest things like going to the supermarket, putting the washing out etc. And I've had soooo many baths! I don't even particularly like baths!

I know how you feel! Its my due date today with DC3. 2 previous DCs induced at 42wks and 40+12 and think I am probably heading for induction again . My pelvis feels like it is splitting in 2 from pressure and lots of braxton hicks when walking. Baby is still very active and his/her head feels like it is corkscrewing around in my pelvis. Little or no sleep, up every hr to wee and if I don't need to wee then hips aching and have to turn over to different side v frequently. I know I will be getting even less sleep when baby finally arrives and shouldn't compain but I have had enough of being pregnant now!

I feel like a massive beached whale! poor Dd is 5 and on half term but I have little energy to keep her entertained. Fortunately Ds is at nursery today but having 2 at home yesterday was really hard work.

Iam At the end of my previous pregnancies I tried to console myself with the fact that I was obviously a very good baby incubator and they were just too comfortable to want to come out. Keep the faith , there is still time for your baby to arrive without induction. I agree with keeping yourself occupied as much as possible and planning something nice to do each day to pass the time and stop yourself thinking about labour. Easier said than done though.

Medics still don't know exactly what starts labour off, its certainly not your fault that you are a week overdue and there is nothing wrong with you. I tried everything in my previous 2 pregnancies to get things moving and it was all a waste of time, even 3 sweeps with a v favourable cervix did nothing last time, but Ds was born within 3hrs of having my membranes ruptured and I was back home the same day good luck.

Thanks everyone. I am really trying to pass the time effectively. I have tried baking, doing massive jigsaw puzzles (cant read as cant concentrate) watching films and tv, had literally a bath every day and a shower - my skin will come off soon - cleaning the house, playing online games, eating and eating and eating. writing. going online. And still - the days just seem impossibly long.

I don't cope well when I have too much time to think - it's the worst thing for someone with depression.

I am scared of being induced and just really really wanted to experience what it is like to start labour - I feel cheated out of it!

I am very scared to go out and about in case my waters break.

I honestly have never felt so bad. I have been anxious and terrified for 9 months - i feel like I MADE IT! and yet - I am getting no reward. it is torturous.

ps. Is being induced horrible?

Stow - Oh, I feel your pain too. It's not so much finding new things you want to do, just finding one positive thing you can latch onto when you think about tomorrow. Even if it's just something like buying a trashy magazine or whatever. Visiting people is always good for passing a half day as well. At least the weather is co-operating a tad with getting out and about in most areas.

Sympathies. 10 & 14 days over here.

I really, really feel for you.

Good luck for when it does happen. (it will, honest).

OP- please don't stay cooped up in the hosue for fear of your waters breaking. Only about 15% of labours start that way. Even then, most will be at home, and a lot are more a trickle than the drama on tv. I'd say the mental health benefits of going out far outweigh any risk on that score. Even if it is just to the shop for a chocolate bar.

I wasn't induced so can't comment. A friend had a very positive experience though. Bit of pethidine and just the pessary thing.

Iam first time round I was induced with pessary and had long labour with baby op presentation. 2nd time round as my cervix was already 1-2cm they broke my waters and ds was born 3hrs later, painful and quick but managed only on gas and air. Episiotomies both times. I haven't had a "natural" labour but still decided to have Dc 3 . I did not need to have a syntocinon drip to augment labour but I think that can be particularly painful so had planned to ask for an epidural before the drip was inserted if this

Having said all this, you still have time to not need induction so try not to let this be your focus. Think of the end product, your baby and try to focus your thoughts on him/her.

i wouldn't worry about going out and your waters breaking when you are out. I don't know anyone that it has happened to. Fresh air and walking will clear your head and also help get baby in optimal position.

Could you contact your midwife to have a chat about how you are feeling and how anxious and worried you are? Keep posting.

Hi all. Just letting you know I had my baby today. He finally had to b induced at term plus 14 and didnt budge til term plus 16 - and only cause they cut him out in the end.

Exhausted

Poor you - sounds like an ordeal and a half! Still it's over now and you have your baby to cuddle. Hope the first few days go well for you. Well done and congratulations!

Congratulations! Hope you're feeling ok after labour. And if you're not, it passes. Promise. Enjoy your little one! X

Congratulations. Hope you recover quickly. What is your son's name?

Heath! he is perfect. And you are right - it is all forgotten now.

Congratulations. I had a horrible labour with my first, culminating in an EMCS, and at first felt like a failure. But 3 years on, I'm much more philosophical about it. (And expecting number 2, however it arrives!) How you give birth has no bearing on you as a mum.

Enjoy your scrummy new baby, hope your recovery is quick and relatively pain free!

Lovely name too x