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Original poster

Please help me with this xx

66 replies

Mummytothearkbuilder · 03/02/2013 08:58

Hi guys

I posted on here last week and got some great responses so wondered whether anyone could help me get through this newest development.

I have been quite anxious since getting my BFP - last week I requested another HCG test to make sure my pregnancy was progressing and the results came back that they had increased from 8137 on 14th Jan to 17866 on 30th Jan - the doctor was happy with this and said I was progressing fine. I have booked an early private scan (thinking I was 7 weeks) as I wanted to see the heartbeat for full reassurance which me and DH went to yesterday. When we got there the sonographer couldn't find anything doing and abdominal scan so he did an internal scan and could see the sac and foetus but couldn't detect a heartbeat Hmmhe gave us a report (he had measured the foetus and it was 8.5mm which he put at 6 weeks 6 days) and some pictures and said to take it to my G.P - he said he was definitely sure it had died and the GP will start the process of removing the foetus from me. I was devastated - in tears and not really taking in what the guy said (thank goodness my DH was there). We phoned the local maternity unit and spoke to a midwife who was lovely - she said they couldn't see me but phoned through to the A&E department asking that they re-do bloods to confirm what the sonographer had said - they did this saying they expect the levels to be the same as 30th Jan or lower but they can back at 20202 - the nurse and doctor were quite shocked and said that either the baby died in the last 2 days and my body hasn't registered it or it was too early to see the heartbeat and the pregnancy may continue normally.

I don't know what to think - I don't want to give up hope but at the same time I don't want to cling to hope that isn't there. I have had no pain or bleeding since my BFP which the doctor said is a good sign. I'm not sure what I am asking really - has anyone been in a similar position or can anyone offer advice?

The doctor simply said go home and don't over do things - either your body will get rid of things naturally or it won't - I know that's all they can say but I am driving myself crazy thinking about things Hmm

Sorry it so long - I only meant to write a short post but it seems to have snowballed!, xxx

OP posts:
Dexidoo · 03/02/2013 09:04

Sorry you are having such a worrying time. It sounds like you need another scan to clarify what it happening before any decisions can be made.

I would say that I am surprised that your GP was happy with your HCG as it should double every 48-72hrs so your second result would have been expected to be higher after 14 days.

I hope you get some good news x

sundaesundae · 03/02/2013 09:12

Oh dear, what a situation to be in. Unfortunately there is no way of knowing right now which way things have gone, but if you want a very sciency answer then this will give you one

books.google.co.uk/books?id=m_nry99oFOAC&pg=PA386&lpg=PA386&dq=how+many+weeks+is+a+8.5mm+crl+fetus&source=bl&ots=pnE-OqM3Ij&sig=4G4XgNnm--8cYanzOoTwiMFdYVA&hl=en&sa=X&ei=LCgOUcSeN6mY0QXo64H4Bw&ved=0CFQQ6AEwBA#v=onepage&q=how%20many%20weeks%20is%20a%208.5mm%20crl%20fetus&f=false

basically if the measurement was accurate then a heartbeat should definitely have been visible. Obviously there will be exceptions to this rule and the measurements may not have been perfectly accurate as it is so small.

All you can do now is wait, hopefully they will scan you again in a week? Have they said? I'd be asking for one, it will be the only thing that will tell you what is going on.

I am so sorry you are going through this, it is horrendous.

phoenixrose314 · 03/02/2013 09:48

I have no advice, only a hug and letting you know I've been through it too. Make sure you talk to your DH, you'll need to stand together to get through this xxx

Original poster
Mummytothearkbuilder · 03/02/2013 10:22

Thanks for your replies. I don't generally do well in situations out of my control so this is a nightmare! It's the not knowing and the conflicting views I got yesterday - the sonographer was 100% this was not viable but the A&E doctor basically said you are only 6w+5 what were you expecting to see. The idea that I am carrying it around and it is dead is so hard (sorry if that sounded blunt) Hmm - I don't even know how to begin getting on with things without knowing what I am up against x

OP posts:
MaryannM · 03/02/2013 11:52

Awe what an awful situation. I am sorry you are going through this uncertainty. If I were you I would push for another scan through your GP Or midwife. We had an early internal scan (on NHS) due to previous pregnancy complications and miscarriages and I was 6w and 1 day and saw a clear heartbeat but saying that the sonographer warned us beforehand that because it was so early that there was no quarantee that we would see a heartbeat. Also their measurements could be out because it is so early, so if it's a week out you would not necessarily see a heartbeat. I wouldn't be happy being told to just wait and see, that's just not fair on you, so try to get a scan on nhs and good luck Hun, I hope it works out for you xx

Original poster
Mummytothearkbuilder · 03/02/2013 12:00

Thanks for the reply - I have just been for a wee and there is a small
amount of brown discharge (sorry tmi) so it looks like the sonographer was right Hmm don't know what happens next - how long will it take? How much will it hurt? When will I stopped feeling so lost and sad? X

OP posts:
Christelle2207 · 03/02/2013 12:05

I'm so sad for your situation. I had my private scan at 8 weeks- I waited that long because I learned that if your dates were a few days out they may not see a heartbeat and in many cases it just can't be seen until after 7 weeks anyway. I don't want to give you false hope but you must push your hospital /midwife for another scan ASAP- either way the picture should become clear in the next few days. Hugs.

GinAndSlimlinePlease · 03/02/2013 13:44

I agree with others, your dates might be out. The nurse at the epu told me that in some ways the technology is not as good as people expect, it's hard for them to see things. Also,some bleeding can be normal (trying to convince myself that's true at the moment!)

Try and get another scan in a few days. At least you'll have some certainty then.

Hugs

Original poster
Mummytothearkbuilder · 03/02/2013 17:06

Thank you all so much for replying - I can't tell you how much it means to me.

I haven't had anymore brown stuff and it was a really small amount (about the size of the top of a screw - had to put it in DIY terms to explain to DH) and it was like string jelly - sorry again for tmi.

My Mum is coming over tomorrow to take my son to pre-school so hoping to get a Drs appointment - not sure what they can do - maybe take my blood again - if it has died surely the hcg level would be static or start to fall??

I keep thinking all will be fine then go back to thinking the worst - I want to be strong and positive but I think in my heart of hearts I know Hmm

Thank you all again so much - you have made me and DH feel not so alone xx

OP posts:
greengoose · 03/02/2013 19:52

Hi, I am sorry this is happening to you. In my experience, if you tell your GP you have had a bleed they will refer you to an early pregnancy unit for a scan. You can request this. They might advise to wait a few days, as things should be clearer by seven weeks. It is very usual to feel out of control and scared, most women do.
Hold onto the fact that at this early stage if it doesnt work out it is not something you did or didn't do. If it helps, my experience of MC at six-seven weeks has always been similar to a heavy clotty period. I have had D&C too, and the thought is much worse than the actual procedure, which is over very quickly and without much discomfort.

I hope for you this is just a scare, and it may still all be fine. Many women don't see HB until seven weeks. The waiting is awful though, be kind to yourself....

elsabel · 03/02/2013 20:11

I would definatly contact your midwife and get another scan (they will refer you asap) then IF the worst has happened they will tell you your options, as it may take a while for your body to react naturally.I really hope you have some good news but if not i am so sorry xx

Christelle2207 · 03/02/2013 21:30

Btw not saying this is good news but my mw said brown blood is usually ok- I had some at the very beginning. A bad news bleed is usually red.

Original poster
Mummytothearkbuilder · 04/02/2013 09:08

I spoke to the early pregnancy unit this morning and they are re-scanning me at 10:30am - I am so scared Hmm I feel like it is to confirm the worst really as the sonographer at the private scan was so adamant that it was not viable.

I don't know how you begin to move on and come to terms with things Hmm

OP posts:
DanniiH · 04/02/2013 09:17

Fingers crossed your first scan was just too early! Brown mucus is fine it'll just be old blood from implantation taking its time to come out.

Good luck! x

TheMightyLois · 04/02/2013 09:22

Fingers crossed for you xxxx

DoodleAlley · 04/02/2013 09:37

Blood can be bad or good so see how it goes but I had both at the start of my pregnancy, admittedly not loads.

They scanned and prodded me and decided it was an extropian which is a sensitised area that sheds cells. They also found a bit of implantation bleeding.

Obviously no one can guarantee what is causing yours until yet look but the EPU I went I has been utterly brilliant and very thorough.

Let them see how worried you have been an they will be more inclined to do every test they can and to explain things clearly to you.

It might sound hollow but you're going to the right people. And as you sit in that waiting room, know that we're all sitting with you. Many of us have been in similar positions thinking the same thoughts.

Good luck

GinAndSlimlinePlease · 04/02/2013 09:39

I'm so glad you're getting re scanned. If it's anything like my experience on friday, they were really sensitive.

I hope everything is ok.

DreamingOfTheMaldives · 04/02/2013 09:59

Good luck ArkBuilder. Hoping for some good news for you x

elsabel · 04/02/2013 10:07

Good luck for today, i have been there and know its an awful worry but soon you will know either way. Thinking of you and will be here whatever the outcome xx

Original poster
Mummytothearkbuilder · 04/02/2013 13:47

Thank you all for your replies - its helped so much - it felt like you were there with me which was lovely as DH couldn't go with me so I took my Mum.

Slightly different situation now - I was expecting them to confirm a loss and to move forward with that but after an external and internal scan she saw a pregnancy sac and yolk with a blood supply pumping to it - she said that means it is feeding something. She put me at no more than 5.5 weeks - closer to 5 than 6 and said it all looks okay for a pregnancy of 5 weeks. I have to go back in 2 weeks for another scan when she will hopefully be able to see more - she said to carrying on as if I am pregnant (folic acid etc) and contact her if i get cramps or bright red blood but brown blood is common in early pregnancy.

I am emotional drained - obviously it is good news that there had been no loss - she said nothing has died in me and no loss is showing, but the next 2 weeks feels like an eternity away - my appt is 18th Feb - sounds like forever away! I am still feeling quite nervous about it all and am hoping for a flicker of a heartbeat on 18th.

She kept my photos and report from the private scan - she was seriously unimpressed and is showing her colleague - not sure whether to email the private scan company - if I had followed their advice I would have taken myself off to hospital for medication or surgery to remove what could be an okay pregnancy - what do you guys think?

Thank you all again so much - I never would have got through this weekend without you - you will never know how much it means to me and my DH xxx

OP posts:
TwitchyTail · 04/02/2013 13:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

sundaesundae · 04/02/2013 13:58

Goodness, not very straight forward then! So they think you only conceived three weeks ago? So somewhere between 11th and 16th of Jan depending on your cycles. FX your dates are just out and things progress positively. I hope that is the case, try not to hold your breath for two weeks, it won't help and will only make you miserable. Try to just take one day at a time and surround yourself with support.

DoodleAlley · 04/02/2013 14:12

Glad to hear they are taking care of you properly and following things up. It sounds much more like the care you should be receiving.

Hold in there

Original poster
Mummytothearkbuilder · 04/02/2013 15:03

Thanks, the scan today did feel more detailed and things were explained a bit better and in more detail.

I'm not sure about the conception dates and in all honesty thats what is on my mind at the moment. My cycles are so varied and long and range from 45 - 65 days - all I know is when I last had my period and when I got my first positive pregnancy test (13th Jan). Can I be only be 5 weeks if I got the positive result on 13th Jan - is it that I just found out really really early? Does that make sense?

The person scanning me today said that dates are not an exact science and some people are convinced that are a certain number of weeks and actually the are maybe one week less than they thought.

Does any of that make sense??? xx

OP posts:
GinAndSlimlinePlease · 04/02/2013 15:16

I'm so relieved for you! It sounds like your dates could well be off.

So unprofessional of the private clinic. Do complain, they've caused you so much unnecessary stress and upset.

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