Miserable Morning Sickness -2nd pregnancy

[VelvetQuilt]

Hello everyone,

It's been over two years since I last posted here having been rather busy with my now two year old son!

I'm about 7 wks into my 2nd pregnancy and 3-4 wks into the misery of morning sickness. It came much earlier this time round and as with my son has rendered me absolutely useless. I literally sit on the sofa for much of the day much to my son's disappointment. I go for days without leaving the house, have an awful taste in my mouth again, overactive salivary glands (which doesn't help the nausea) and the ability to throw up at any time (accompanied by a red rash around my eyes afterwards). My first pregnancy was accompanied by 3.5 months of awful sickness, much the same as now.

I feel so very sad. This was a planned pregnancy as before but for some reason I'd hoped this would be a different experience and perhaps I'd avoid the sickness all together. My husband works from home and has found himself lumbered with caring for our son, working full time and doing everything around the house. He's incredibly supportive and reassures me it's not forever (and it's not) but sometimes the atmosphere at home is very tense and strained because he's under so much pressure. I've felt so depressed of late I've even discussed a termination with him. I don't think I could ever go through with it as this baby is very much wanted, but sometimes the idea of feeling normal and functioning again over shadows that.

Anyway, not really sure what my aim was from posting this, perhaps I just needed to put it out there. I just wish I could see light at the end of this tunnel.

Hi Velvet,

I totally sympathise with you. I had ms with my son from weeks 7 to 25 and it was awful, but for some reason with the passage of time (he's 3 now) I persuaded myself it wasn't really that bad, that every pregnancy is different and that I might not be sick much at all this time.

Needless to say, this time the nausea kicked in at week 5 and was awful. I was off work between weeks 12 and 20 as I literally couldnt' do anything (I share your excess saliva (i needed a spit bucket next to me for months) and horrible taste in my mouth, which with my son lasted throughout my pregnancy).

I normally work mornings and pick up my son at 1pm (20 minute walk). I managed up to week 12 when I just simply wasn't capable of looking after him, and I had to put him in full-time childcare, and the guilt was tremendous (even now I think how this pregnancy has cost me 2 months of playing/looking after my son).

My DH functioned as a single parent during those months (talking made me sick so I couldn't even read him a bednight story).

Even now (nearly 23 weeks) I'm still not back to normal, but am getting my son dropped off at 3pm, and hope to add some 1pm finishes in (but it's the 20 minute walk I can't face). But the sickness is only once every 4/5 days, the excess saliva has gone and at last, I can drink water (found it difficult to keep liquids down).

I just wanted to say, I totally share your misery, and I found it much much harder to deal with this time round than last time, but for me it hasn't lasted forevcer, it does end and you will be back to functioning normally.

Do you have anyone nearby that could look after your son in the afternoons to give you and OH a break? I was lucky in having a flexible childminder (as we have no family close by) and I couldnt' have coped otherwise.

I'm so sorry you're feeling so bad, and I have no miraculous cures, I just wanted to send you sympathy and hugs!

thanks for much for your reply. When you said it made you feel sick to talk I nearly cried-I'm exactly the same. I also have to keep my cheeks tense else my saliva glands get worse-I must look ridiculous sitting here pouting!
I had tried anti-nausea drugs when I was expecting my son and I didn't take them for long as they didn't do anything for me. I feel somewhat reluctant to try them again because, well, you can never be too sure can you?

We live miles from any family and my sister who is relatively close by has a full time job, we're completely on our own :(

I know it'll all go eventually but it's the not knowing when I find so hard to deal with.

Xx

I'm sorry you're so isolated, it's a shame you can't get anyone to help out as I can imagine how stressful it is for both of you when you can't do anything to help, and understandably your OH will get stressed as he's trying to do two things at once.

It reached a point for me when one afternoon I just had to lie down and couldn't get up and my son was asking me to play and I was saying I couldnt and suggested he played in his room - which he did. Then 15 minutes later he came and told me how he'd climbed up on his little bookcase to stand on the windowsill and wave to folk going past...

I felt awful, was immediately reassured that the window was locked, but he could have fallen or anything, and the worst thing was I couldn't actually get up, even then, to stop him from doing it again. I put him in full-days after that as I knew I was incapable of looking after him, but as I say I was lucky to have a childminder there who is really flexible (cost us way more pennies, but figured we just had to take the hit for a few months)

Maybe your sister can help out at weekends which might give your OH a chance to catch up on any work he's missing out on by looking after your son during the week? Although that depends on the kind of job he's doing.

I think it's hard for men (or other women who have never really appreciated it) to really appreciate how debilitating it is, if it was just a case of throwing up, it'd be so easy, it't the constant extreme feelings of 'seasickness' that make it impossible to function.

It could be worth visiting your GP though, saying what you used last time and that it didn't work and see if they can suggest anything else? I didnt pursue medicatiosn this time as a lot of people seemed to indicate they stopped them vomiting but didnt always do anything to get rid of the nausea (which was my main problem) but part of me does wish I had at least discussed medication with my GP.

Just wanted to add my best wishes to u know how horrible it is. I now have gorgeous little baby boy but in the early weeks I was sooo very sick and had toddler to look after and no help:-( dp working all day every day I actually got bit depressed from feeling so ill that constant sick feeling and went to docs eventually as I couldn't function. I was too tiered to get up one day aswel and dd went off and picked up a cup from the kitchen and I felt so guilty wen she brought it to me that she could have actually hurt herself. No advice really but sympathy to u and do whatever it takes to get through it. It will get better!!