2 nd child doubts....

[BabyAcorn]

I am not quite sure where to post this, but hope I can have some words of encouragement from you all....

Basically I had my little boy 14 months ago and is the apple of my eye. I totally love being a mummy and everything that has gone with it...

When I was pregnant, I put on 5 stone, told I was ok and didn't have pre eclampsia ( but did!) then had a terrible labour of 5 days, needed up in c section, then they thought they had paralysed me after the forth try of epidural.

Then had lots of infections,( celluti s) and a numb foot. They have damaged nerves from my foot, but because I can walk hospital have not done anything and after coucilling and talking about it nearly every day for the first 10 months as well as flash backs, I was quite set never to have another baby, which I was so so upset by, as I didn't want my baby to not have a sibling and he does a step brother but is 13 .

Anyway , I thought I was pregnant a few days ago, and was upset, after this whole year, hubby said never again and had gone through it all with me we both sort of was going down that path. Then I burst into to tears told him that I thought I may be because I am never late with my periods, and he didn't really say anything.

I return saying, it's ok I am on my period. Hubby saying, ok, we'll I thought you were.... I said I was so worried you didn't want another one, etc, then he said, well, I think we should go for it. I was so so shocked... He is 10 years older than me, so he had said once he gets to 40 that's it, and because I'd been so poorly and with the every day remember acne of my rubbish foot, I just am so scared that this time, what if they do actually paralyse me?

I am delighted that hubby is happy for another one, but I am so so scared! And all because I have a curve of the spine!

Any thoughts!
Thanks very much xx

Sorry you're feeling this way.
From a practical perspective do you still have nerve injury? May be worth asking for nerve conduction studies and an MRI of your back. The conduction studies can prove ongoing nerve problems. The MRI would be of huge value to an anaesthetist (I'm one) in determining a safe way to provide anaesthesia again, and they won't do it when you're pregnant. Your gp could refer you directly for the mri or you could ask for a referral to an obstetrician who runs a prenatal clinic. Also ask for an appointment with an obstetric anaesthetist to discuss your medical history and concerns.

Also, may be worth asking for the supervisor of midwives to go through what happened last time, so you can understand where it all went wrong.
You're likely to be offered an elective section if that's what you prefer and you can always do this under general anaesthesia if necessary.

You'll be classed as "high risk" I'd have thought so you should get much closer monitoring this time.

You will need to be very careful with your weight gain, I know it's difficult (28/40 with dc2) but use healthy snacks and get a dietician referral if necessary. It will make pregnancy and recovery much easier for you if you can limit your weight.

You've been through a hell of a time and IMO you are very brave to even consider doing it again. Every pregnancy is different though and it may be much more straightforward this time. Look at your son - worth every minute? It would be the same with dc2.

Good luck with whatever you chose.

Thank you so much for that...

I have had an MRI scan, no nerve damage in my back, and that's why they don't understand why I still have tingles and numb foot and to be honest, my calf certainly does not feel the same.

I have had the midwife round to go through notes, they basically said everything was done wrongly, even down to me telling every one I was worried about the epidural, and low platelets, they still went ahead. I did ask about putting me under general, but they said they tend not to do it any more. The midwife who was caring for me during the important stages was so bad, she turned up all my bits and pieces that when the doctor came in, he switched her because all my levels were too high.

The physio lady said they were baffled with my MRI results and to keep on teaching dancing which is my job, just don't get after a year it's got better, but not fully recovered. Same days are bad and hubby has to massage my foot to get the feeling back.

My weight gained when I stopped dancing when baby breeched and I got sciatica , I put on a stone in a few weeks, then hospital said I was fine, when I wasn't .

I haven't heard of a nerve study, when I went to the doctors they just said MRI scan. If I go back will they do this for me? Or should I go some where different?

Thanks so much it's nice to hear some one thinking that I am not crazy x

Glad you've made positive steps. Nerve conduction studies look at the nerves further away from your back. Your gp would probably need to refer you to a neurologist to request these. info here.
These studies won't make you better but can diagnose where the problem is. It sounds like you are improving, which is great. Nerves regenerate at about 1mm per day, so it can take a long long time for improvement and things often end up less perfect than they were.
The majority of nerve injuries during childbirth are actually from obstetric reasons and not from an epidural, it's just easy to see the epidural as a reason, and they do carry risk.
Do ask to speak to an anaesthetist, it may help you get a plan about safe delivery, which should help your decision. A spinal anaesthetic is different to an epidural - epidural is with plastic tube left in your back, spinal is single shot with much smaller needle. Spinals can be safely done with lower platelet levels (>80 generally), epidurals should not be. You can always have a general anaesthetic though, just stick to what you decide after you've had the pros and cons explained. They are done less because it is known there are higher risks attached, specifically difficulty with your airway and risk of aspiration, but this needs to be weighed against the risk of nerve damage in your case and you'd need to see an anaesthetist, who had access to your MRI, to get the best opinion for you.

Hope that helps.