lonely and scared @ 35weeks

[Littlemissmagnet]

Hi I already have a DS who is nearly 3. I am not as worried about labour as it will be what it will be.
But I am terrified because I worry about my DS and what will happen him. I have 1 friend I can ask to help until my Father in law can collect him he is 3.5hours away. I have no family or other friends here. I am worried if she cannot have him what I will do. Go into hospital on my own I guess as DH will have DS. Now that is a scary thought as I relied on DH so much the first time.
I just don't know what will calm me down I just feel lonely and isolated right now which makes me terrified of the whole thing. I just cannot think of the baby coming as it fills me with dread.
Which is stupid as I really want another baby. it is just my shyness is starting a very negative effect my experience of this pregnancy and labour. Please tell me to stop being silly and get on with it cause I know deep down I'll have to. I just wish I wasn't so alone.

Oh dear sweetheart why so lonely? Where do you live? In the uk?

Could maybe a family member or friend come to stay with you around your due date, maybe the days before & days after, not really practical if they're working but if you have retired family/super helpful friends?

Yes In the UK. I find it difficult to make friends now dunno why was fine at uni/school. The trouble is they r all over the country with own lives now and I just don't seem to want the be a burden on people. My family are in Ireland so I just feel its me and my DH and DS really.

Is homebirth an option? Your ds might sleep through it if it happens at night - mine did!

Perhaps talk with your midwife & see if she has any ideas, she'll more than likely have spoken to women in the same situation before & may be able to give better advice?
Was your labour quick with DS?

I was going to say homebirth especially if you live close by to the hospital in case you need a transfer.
Where in the uk are you? You could line up a childminder maybe to take ds until fil gets there? So dh could go with you. Or ask a local nursery and start him going now one day a week to get used to it?
Or if you live near me he could come and play with my ds. But I doubt it cos nobody lives near me (silly rural dream living)

That's a good idea about the midwife I assumed she wouldn't be interested. 8 hours start to finish hardly time to blink really. I only realised I was actually in labour 5 hours in! (As i had no show and no waters breaking until after I got to hospital) I was only in hospital a few hours before he was born.

Does ds go to a Playgroup or anything? I bet if you voiced your concerns there a mum would step up and offer to help.
That's the thing you see, mums help mums, it's not a burden we all want to help.
So you mustnt feel shy or that you are burdening people, they genuinely will want to help you out.
I have noticed that recently, when I was ill and had a new baby people I didn't really know would offer to look after ds or take him a walk etc! I was really touched.

When you think of the baby coming try to think of it as just one day/ one night out of your whole life and that it will be over so quickly your ds will hardly know what's happened. And then you will be at home with a snuggly new baby and ds cuddling them both in bed. Bliss!!