What would you do??? - Work Related

[Jenjen85]

Just after a bit advice really as im a bit upset about what i heard in work today, so my regional manager walks in and says morning to everyone, i also say morning but i dont think he heard me so he Says morning jenny and i said morning i did say it when you walked in but you obviousely didnt hear me. He then askes me whats up and i just said i dont feel too well.

Any way he walks over to his desk and starts chatting about work stuff to other members of the office then i heard him mutter (quite a loud mutter as i dont sit that close to him) after all the weeks she has had off you think should could muster a F$%&ing smile (about me)

I have only just gone back to work after having 5 weeks off due to morning sickness and then 2 weeks off for christmas. Hearing this really upset me (probably just cos im a hormonal wreck at the minute) but still i dont think he should have said it especially as other people in the offiec would have heard too. My manager wasnt in the office today so i called him and explained and got upset on the phone and he said i could work from home this afternoon.

What would you do about the situation? Would you go and speak to HR (HR lady isnt back in until Monday) or would you just leave it with reporting it to your manager. I was that upset that iv come home and burst into tears, the manager in question isnt the nicest person in the world and he has said things before (when i wasnt pregnant) but i now feel like i dont want to go to work incase he says anything again ( i know i shouldnt feel like this as im a grown woman)

Sorry for the huge post and thanks for reading if you have got this far Any help would be gratefully appreciated

Its not very nice, but like you said he isn't a very nice person so although its not great, maybe just try to ignore him? Or take some cakes to work with you in the morning to share around & try to treat it as a fresh start now after 7 weeks away. He probably knows what he said was heard & feels a bit silly now himself, a nice gesture could break the ice a bit and make your work a bit more pleasant.

he sounds pissed off. it's not nice covering for people. he was out of order for upsetting you, but once you get back into the swing of things he'll be ok. some people just don't sympathise with pregnancy i'm afraid and you kind of have to suck it up.
not saying this is my opinion AT ALL, but i experienced it too. you can't change it...keep your head down and carry on, not much else you can do...besides won't matter a jot once the baby is here :-)

He sounds an arse.

Like you say, other people will of heard the comment and I am sure will also think 'what an arse'.

You did the right thing telling your manager, but if the regional manager is senior to him or you think the hr lady will be more understanding, then report it to them on Monday. Either way it might be worth a meeting with the hr lady just to tell her that you are having a difficult pregnancy which is leaving you very tired, not feeling well etc. and talk through your work options eg you might be able to work from home once a week on a regular basis or reduce your hours.

I hope things at work improve for you.

The thing is ladies (supose i should have mentioned this in my first post) is that he has never really liked me since i started 4 years ago and its not the first time he has said nasty/spiteful things. He hasnt had to cover any of my work while i have been off as he doesnt cover the role that i work in so it hasnt effected him at all. My current manager is leaving at the end of the month (due to the regional manager) so im hoping that he doesnt get worse once he leaves.

In that case speak to hr about him and start keeping a record of all incidences, in case you want to make a formal complaint about him in the future.

Do you know if anyone else at your work is having problems with him? It would help if other people also kept records and compained to hr if they were having problems.

This is just my personal opinion though,so it might be worth talking to Citizens Advice about it.

I know of a few other people who have problems with him but most of them have left and the others that are still here wont speak up. My manager did speak to his manager (who happens to be one of the directors) and he suggested speaking to HR on Monday and see what they say. There are a couple of occasions that i can mention about when i speak with HR but my manager did tell me to keep a log. I dont want things to be awkward at work as i dont need the stress but i really dont want to have to go to work when he is being funny.

Keep a diary of everything that happens, including what happened this morning. If you can remember the date and time of anything retrospective that he said/did include that too.

You won't care at all when your baby is here. Your morning sickness will be long gone but he'll be stuck with his personality.

Hi Jen sorry you've been unwell. I think being honest you need to toughen up a bit; he has no right to talk to you like this but I think you're being incredibly dramatic saying you can't face going into work because of it!! If it's not the first similar incident then I would speak to HR and tell them all of the incidents you can but I think it would reflect very badly on you if you went off sick due to such a small comment. Did you confront him at the time?

Please don't take my comments in the wrong way; I've been a victim of workplace bullying myself in the past, and have also been senior management so I am trying to see it from both sides.