Bedtime Blankie and Dummy

[Lau1973]

Hi,

I am 30 weeks pregnant, first baby and not a clue about many things!

I had the idea of buying some dummies last weekend and my husband just jumped over me and said, it is not necessary! dummies juts stop babies from talking. He also did not want me to buy a bedtime blankie, as some kids get attached to them for years and they can not have a baby bottle or go to sleep without the blankie. Is this bad? or not?

Any experience will be good to know, many thanks!!

Hi there,
I bought dummies for my newborn and he never really took to them. Then at a few weeks old he found his thumb and now sucks his thumb to go to sleep (he's almost 3).

He also has a 'bunny' as a comforter which was given to us and which lay ignored in his cot, until one day he adopted it and now needs it for every sleep.

I hate seeing children dragging around grimey blankies and sucking their thumbs at all hours, so I was a bit concerned initially, but our rule is that bunny doesn't leave the bed, so my son almost never sucks his thumb at other times. And I'm happy with that. The chances are that he won't be sucking his thumb and snuggling up to bunny when he's 18, so what's the harm?

In my experience, most kids need some form of comfort to drift off to sleep...

Good luck with whatever you decide. One tip: if you do get a blankie or something like that, make sure you can have a spare otherwise the day you forget it or lose it, your child might have the biggest meltdown EVER!

I bought dummies for DS but he wouldn't take one and we decided it was less hassle to deal with him crying now without a dummy than to try and force one on him and have to get it off him later.

DS does love his blankies though - we have loads of the same one once he'd got attached to one so some can go in the wash / to nana's house / to nursery etc. Ds is 3 now and likes to have one when he goes to bed / wakes up / watches TV but isn't bothered the rest of the time. I often pick him up from nursery and it's with his coat rather than with him. He needs it more when he's ill but he doesn't drag it around shops with him or anything. He's not <a class="break-all" href="http://www.google.co.uk/imgres?q=peanut+linus&hl=en&lr=&sa=X&tbo=d&biw=1317&bih=657&tbm=isch&tbnid=X6RtizweXohRuM:&imgrefurl=peanuts.wikia.com/wiki/Linus_van_Pelt&docid=cF7v-QihZyLxJM&imgurl=images1.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20090301044431/peanuts/images/0/07/Meet_linus_big.gif&w=267&h=265&ei=it_BUKXXHoeShgfm6oHQDQ&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=2&vpy=119&dur=2168&hovh=212&hovw=213&tx=114&ty=141&sig=114401466580596777519&page=1&tbnh=148&tbnw=149&start=0&ndsp=22&ved=1t:429,r:0,s:0,i:84" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Linus by any means.

my ds has a dummy. Initially i really didnt want to give him one, as it woud just be hard work to wean him off it later. But dear god it was a lifesaver. At birth he was bf, and seriously he wanted feeding every hour night and day. Too much for my poor little sleep deprived self to handle. It wasnt that he was hungry everytime, he just wanted the comfort, so at 2 months i gave in and started with the dummy.....
.....it worked :D Took him a while to take to it but since then he has been much better with the feeding nightime stuff. Hes 20 months now, and hasnt had a nightime feed since he was about 7 months. ( he still wakes up too many times a night. lol ) generally speaking if i pop the dummy back in he'll go off again.
Have got to the point in the last few months of trying to stop him usung it so much. He'll have it at bedtime, and spit it out as soon as hes asleep, but he still wants it in the day alot. Distraction is good, and i think it maybe has slowed his speech down ever so slightly, but hes still on track, and a much happier baby ( and mummy) for having had some sleep :P
plus i know so many kids who have one, and it dosnt seem to have affected their speech noticeably or given them buck teeth etc..

You don't have to have everything ready before you give birth - you can still go shopping afterwards! Wait and see if these are things that you think might help your DC, when he/she arrives. A kind relative may well give you a comforter as a gift.

Hope it all goes well.

We've bought dummies on the advice from the assistant at Mother care who said they reduce the risk of cot death while sleeping.

^ yep I was going to get a dummy for the same reason.

I've seen night time ones that Avent do that are supposed to be specially shaped so as not to cause any buck teeth problems, and was thinking about getting one only to use at night when baby is going to sleep (unless he/she doesn't like it of course!)

i use the avent ones and theyre fab. expensive tho....4.90 for two.but worth it for what they are

DD has a dummy, she's now 2.9yo. She has it for bedtime only, and is VERY verbal she never stops bloody talking

DS (7mo) has never really taken to a dummy.

DD also has her 'bunny' for bedtime. There's no harm in letting your child have a comforter if you want. If you do buy one, then get a spare or two as well, and rotate them (in secret) from an early age

I was completely against dummies ... Until my DS wanted to suck. On me. Constantly. He also has a comforter toy. Both are only allowed at bed time. His speech is advanced, and although he is attached to both, I'm certainly not worried about it.

I do have a dummy ready for dc2, but she'll only get it if she needs it, same as her brother. Comforter is also ready, but that I will push. I think it's good and healthy for them to have a security object for when I inevitably can't always be there.

I was anti-dummies until DNephew was born! He definitely benefitted for having one. What I'd say is the sooner you take a dummy away, the easier it is! It also depends on discipline if you let them have it when they're older. Yes, it will impair speech if they've got it in most of the time as they get older but it's ok if it's just for sleeping.

We've bought a 'teddy comforter' - a teddy attached to a blanket. In fact we've bought two so that we can rotate them in case it needs washing or gets left somewhere!

Wow, thanks Mums, for sharing all your experiences with me!! it looks like i have time to decide and see what my baby needs... but it looks like there is not anything wrong with blankies or dummies all good experiences!!
I will need to show the post to my husband

Your husband may change his mind once baby is here and he's desperate for sleep...

I didn't buy dummies for when DS was born and regretted having to find an open shop on a bank holiday on the way home from hospital so i could buy some! DS found great comfort from them and they were easy to get rid of. I would get one or two, just in case. Mam ones are good, and advent ones are nice for newborns.
He has a 'sheepy' who is now the smelliest most disgusting 'creature', but DS loves him and i like that he has someone to snuggle up to and have conversations with before bed.

I WISH my DS had taken a dummy in the early days. Alas he didn't. I was definitely very anti-dummy, until I had a screaming baby to deal with. I am still anti-dummy when I see older kids with dummies (like 2 or 3 year olds). But if it makes life easier, give your baby a dummy and then wean them off it slowly before 6 months.

With regards to a comfort blanket. A child will get attached to whatever they please and it really differs from child to child. My DS (18mo) isn't particularly attached to any object (despite him having several stuffed animals in his cot). I got attached to a stuffed animal when I was a baby and didn't like to sleep without it until I was nearly 15!

I have DTs, one is a thumb sucker the other had a dummy. The thumb sucker was never interested in a dummy and vice versa.
The dummy was so much easier than the thumb, he gave it up at two. The thumb sucking continued till school age.

I can offer a perspective from the other side of the coin. I sucked my thumb from an early age and had a blanket. I used it for sleep, when watching telly and generally when I felt shy and like I needed a bit of love (had two siblings by this point, both younger).

I wasn't quite a linus - but I did take great comfort from it. I remember finding it on a school trip to Wales when I was 12 (my mum secretly packed it) and was sooooo happy (I was tragically homesick).

As I got older, I kept it, and often kept a tiny scrap in my pocket to rub when having a tough time at secondary school.

I still have it now. I say 'it' it turns out there were a couple of variations! I don't use it anymore though. I stopped a couple of years ago when DP became a much better comforter!

I am 32 years old and have had a successful career, working in rather a glamourous and high-powered job for several years. It didn't hold me back. I knew when to use it and when not to.

I still have memories of my two sisters being 'weaned off'/deprived of their dummies and remember the trauma.

When I become a mum, I will offer a dummy, and see how they take to it. If they don't fancy a dummy, I won't be broken hearted. I turned out all right

haha you remember everything!!

I never used a dummy or a blankie, i just sucked my thumb till i was 6 years old.. my teeth looked like a marquee and i had to use braces!

I think, as the same for me, i can not go bed without my ipod and my guided meditation.. for some babies are dummies, or teddy bears or blankies. Of course, everything has a limit and that is not something kids will do by themselves... I would not like the idea of my babies using that stuff for so long, but, i have to wait to be a mum first to talk!

I was saying to my mum we're not going to do dummies so we don't have the hassle of getting rid of them later. Sh said that's fine but beware that some babies just need them; apparently I was born with blisters on my hands from where I'd been sucking them even before I was born! Also I'm not convinced on the speech thing, I had a dummy until I was 4 (!) and I never shut up...