first time mum questions

[lauraellajane]

I read somewhere in passing the other day about someone washing all their baby clothes in time for the arrival, then I chanced across a Youtube video about tummy time... and it's made me worry all the things that I don't have a clue about!!

I've read Parenting for Dummies which was really useful (will read it again) but I've probably forgotten half of it already and I'm watching loads of Youtube information videos to try to prepare, but it doesn't feel good enough!

What are all you other first time mums doing to learn the ropes before baby arrives? (Or how did you prepare first time around?)

Thanks!

My babies hated 'tummy time', don't worry about it.

All you need to remember is feed them often, cuddle them a lot, change nappies regularly and wash the baby a couple of times a week.

Wipe around the tops of the thighs and creases in the neck, they like to hide crusty bits of milk/poo in those.

And apply for a school place in about 4 years time. The rest is a piece of piss.

Do what feels right. If the baby cries feed them, check nappy, give them a cuddle etc. If baby gets a sore bottom use nappy cream and try changing their nappy more often (always straight after a poo). As a general rule baby needs one more layer of clothing on than you, to feel warm enough. Everything else will all fall into place and you can go to Post Natal classes that the Health Visitor will offer you/be able to tell you about when she visits you at home after having the baby.

Most mums ask each other and learn as they go along.

Don't worry about reading books etc. You will be fine.

I read books etc and though I'd know exactly what to do but babies don't work like that. I think reading all of those books that tell you what you should do just set you up for a fall. I was so stressed out when ds1 was born because i put so much pressure on myself to do everything by the book.

Ds1 is now 5 and has a 7 month old little brother. This time around I'm just going with the flow. As long as he's fed, warm and has a clean bum he's happy and so am I.

Congratulation too

Im glad i didn't read any books or go to any classes!
I also didn't have a clue but knew that women have been doing this for years and if I got the basics right ie feed when hungry, change when pooey, make sure to wash and dry their creases and clean clothes, well that and lots of cuddles and you can't go far wrong.
I just went with the flow regarding sleeping etc, baby will do what its going to do no matter what a book says!
Relax and enjoy

See, i know it sound weird, but you really dont know what you are going to get.

By this i mean, i read books and sought advice from other people, but in the end, every expectation and every plan went out of the window because my baby was so different from anything i could have imagined.

It was definitely a "suck it and see" and take on the babies needs in that moment iyswim.

I am kind of prepared this time, as i do have experience, BUT i am hoping for another very different baby again (For very different reasons).

If it makes you feel any better, i knew nowt about babies, but we learned together as we went along.

If it helps you feel prepared then by all means check out books, websites, ante-natal classes etc. but it's not the end of the world if you don't. Read up on SIDS and make sure you understand about not over-heating the baby, feeding every few hours etc but don't let it frighten you, it's still incredibly rare. That's the only important thing really. Everything else you'll learn on the job!

Phew that makes me feel better, thanks!! Xx

You can't spoil a newborn. Don't worry about routines etc (unless it suits you) don't worry about creating 'bad habits' or 'sleep associations'

The first three months can be horrendous, but no one will tell you that. Everyone will tell you 'it goes so fast' and you'll want to thump them but it does!

White Noise is genius! When a baby is over tired they scream to block out external noise... If you provide a bit of white noise... They conk out!

I found the "First ,time Parents " by Lucy Atkins was a really down to earth guide, was in my local library - don't buy it!

You will get the hang of it pretty quickly and there is always MN for any/every question. Plus NHSDirect call you back much quicker if it's for a baby even if it's 3am!

Have you seen Raising Arizona? There's a scene where Nicolas Cage gives the baby to Holly Hunter and then passes her a child care book (Dr. Spock?) and says "here's the instruction manual".

Well they do that in the hospital. They give you a copy of NHS Birth to Five which is the only book you'll ever need to reference (not necessarily read). It's thin, factual and has no agenda.

Congratulations!

Stuff I wish I had been told. Number one eye rolling. its actually normal. DD used to roll her eyes to the top of her head till you could see the whites as she drifted to sleep. Took a week before my dad casually mentioned in conversation if it happened not to worry.

Whatever you read and prepare for your child will probably do the opposite. At least mine did. We had no teething problems whatsoever and I had been reading and stocking up on bonjella and teething rings for nothing. keep a book handy and read it when you need to.

hi, Im a first time momma too. My DS is 7weeks old. I had all theses worries but it really is amazing, when h/she arrives something changes in you and you just know what to do. Try not to bog yourself down by reading to much. Best bit of advice I was given was to listen to what others say and take from it what you want. As a mother you won't do anything wrong you will just learn what's best for you and baby. You will find what work best for yourself. Enjoy every minute and try not to worry