Oh, my love, nobody is going to call you a daft cow or anything so silly. I think everyone is at the least a bit apprehensive before their first birth, but what you're feeling is well on the way to tokophobia, a full-fledged phobia of giving birth. Nobody should ever insult or belittle you for feeling like that.
However, I DO think there's a lot you can do to improve the experience for yourself. I really wouldn't advice staying in 'blissful' ignorance, because actually you're not blissful about this, are you? - you're terrified. The link posted above from OBEM about Heather giving birth in the bath is great and lovely to watch, but Heather wasn't actually nervous leading up to it, she just went with the flow and it worked out for her.
Three main things that might help you view the process more positively:
Try hypnobirthing, either as a CD or a course if you can afford it. You're trying to train your brain into realising that it's all actually going to be fine, whatever happens. Birth IS unpredictable, so you need to teach yourself techniques for staying calm, even if things don't quite go to plan (for instance if a EMCS is recommended at the last minute).
Secondly, I think things are a lot easier if you have a confident, reassuring birth partner who is there all the time for you (and your DP might be too stressed to do that properly). Would you be able to afford a doula? A doula would be able to 'fight your corner' with possibly overworked hospital staff and check that your needs are being met. Make a birth plan with your doula (or other birthing partner) and check with the hospital how likely it is that this plan can/will be met. You're scared of the pain (fair enough) - what option would suit you for early labour, would you want an epidural for later on? You're scared of the indignity (also fair enough) - work out which clothes would best make you feel secure, emphasise in your birth plan that you don't want the world and his dog traipsing into the room, but also just consider the idea that in the middle of labour you really won't care about indignity.
Finally, just a suggestion, but if things are that bad, you might want to consider finding a consultant who would do a ELCS. Yes, there are risks involved with it - it's major surgery - but might actually be more sensible than going ahead with a vaginal birth when so overwhelmingly afraid.
I think you DO need to arm yourself with info about how labour progresses, and how and why the 'normal' procedure might need to be changed for medical reasons. Otherwise there is a risk that you will totally freak out by being confronted with so much new information while in labour itself. I DON'T think that watching OBEM is necessarily the best way of preparing - as was said above, it's very sensationalist.
Labour really doesn't have to be something dreadful - I did it twice, in a lovely environment (a private birthing centre) accompanied by DP and two midwives, with zero pain relief - once on all fours, once in the bath. I didn't do this because I am some sort of masochist or 'brave', but because I have a morbid fear of hospitals. So I dealt with that fear by setting up a system whereby I could give birth and bypass the hospital altogether - but I was always aware of the risk that in a medical emergency both me and the baby would be transferred to hospital.