Want to get on with it in private, am I weird and any suggestions?!

[wellieboots]

Not sure if this makes me odd but I am really keen to get on with labour without anyone knowing, just me and DH, go to hospital, shut the door, do what I've got to do without any annoying texts, phone calls, or even just the pressure of knowing that people are waiting for news!

Clearly in certain circumstances it would be unavoidable, such as if I was out and about at someone's place when things started, or had plans we had to cancel or whatever, Im not going to be stupid about it, it's just a preference.

However, my major issue is that DH works with his Dad, he has been supposed to be moving on for ages, but I have finally realised (at 32+4) that that is not going to happen pre baby :) But it means that, if I call him at work if something happens, or if he doesn't go in because I've gone into labour, his Dad will know whereupon interfering nightmare MIL will know within 5 mins and will get panicky and start calling and stressing us as well as herself!

Any suggestions? We are not good liars and they will prob put 2 and 2 together anyway. Do I just need to chill and accept now that my birth is going to be a public event?

Thanks for any advice!

I went into labour with a housefull of people, and just said I was going for a check up, next day baby was born.

It's possible, the less said the better.

I think you can be honest and say that when labour starts you won't be shouting it from the rooftops since it could be a false alarm anyway. You can also be very clear that only you and DH will be at the hospital.

But I thought it was very weird when my MIL actually outright lied that SIL had gone to hospital in labour . Everyone felt quite hurt as we are certainly not the type to be texting/calling for updates!

You might imagine that you will be terribly aware of the 'pressure' of other people knowing but, quite frankly, once you are underway a brass band could march through the room and you won't give a monkeys

I don't really think it is worth making a scene about and potentially damaging family relationships tbh.

I'm seriously thinking of not telling anyone either. I will be induced 2 weeks early (pre-existing medical condition makes this necessary) so our LO is likely to arrive 2 weeks earlier than anyone expects. I am definitely thinking of not letting anyone know that this is whats planned, so that - hopefully - the pressure is not on too much on the day of the induction itself.

To the OP - I think you should come up with a straightforward, easy, lie NOW and start practising it, running it through in your head and tell it to each other. The more familiar you are with it, the less weird it will feel to lie. If your DH is at work, he just spouts the lie, says he has to run and will call later.

I would go for:

• flooded bathroom / broken boiler / power cut
• you feel unwell (not labour -something like feeling dizzy or an upset stomach)
• blame something else entirely like one of his mates has been burgled or needs an urgent lift somewhere or something

Men are really quite stupid . I'm sure his dad will swallow it.

Thanks everyone, at least I don't feel like I'm the only one who would get stressed about this! I definitely don't want to make a scene or a big deal or damage relationships or anything like that, I just would prefer to keep it quiet if possible. And as others have said, it may all be over with over a weekend which would be perfect! 4-14 that is incredible!

Good luck to everyone with your impending births or babies, and thanks for your input!

When I was overdue my MIL and mother were both fairly restrained, but my SIL had no such luck. Both her parents were on the phone twice a day each for the two weeks she went overdue. She nearly went bananas. Presumably they thought that if she did go into labour and have the baby that she might just forget to tell them they had a new grandson.

Actually - I think the best excuse would be for DH to fake sickness that day. Just suddenly exclaim "oh god", dash to the toilet and come back looking sheepish saying his bum exploded and he has to go home

Oh god when I went overdue I just was driven crazy by everyone asking constantly "still here, then?" "have you had it yet?" and the constant "Not long to go now!" - wish I'd had a quid every time someone said one of those three catchphrases, I'd have made enough to have a short break!

I ended up snarling at the phone every time it rang NoIhaven'tfuckinghadityetfuckorffffffffff (then I'd pick it up and attempt to be nice through gritted teeth)

I was induced with my son and had my phone stuck to me as i had so many interfering texts.

So, why didn't you just switch the phone off then?

I have no compunction about not being contactable as long as OH and DD are either with me or can contact me. Unless anyone has children that need to be looked after I don't understand why anyone need tell the world that they have just gone into labour. My waters broke when I was talking to a workmate on the phone so I couldn't exactly keep it a secret from her, but neither family knew I had started. The first they knew of DD was when OH rang them. I didn't take my mobile to hospital - it never occurred to me. But 12 years ago people weren't welded to their mobiles the way they are now.

Not weird at all. I really wanted to be completely alone- Not even with DH- But didn't do it as he wanted to be there.

So glad I had my DS well before it was deemed essential for everyone to carry a mobile phone with them all the time. We didn't tell anyone until after DS was born, no one needed to know I had gone into hospital.

Seriously BunBaker why on earth did you have your phone stuck to you, it wasn't as if you needed it for an emergency ? .

Seriously BunBaker why on earth did you have your phone stuck to you, it wasn't as if you needed it for an emergency ?

Not me. I was replying to another poster. I agree with you. If I was in labour now I would switch my phone off, something that a lot of people seem unable to do.