Feeling low at 37wks+4

[osaenlondres]

Pg with my first baby. It's a second week of my maternity leave and whilst I was hoping to enjoy it, it's been far from it. I have to do a few things (paperwork, some household admin calls, a couple of external appointments, but no strenuous activities); yet I keep procrastinating. I was anticipating that I would go out for lunches -with friends or on my own, have aternoon naps, read, maybe finish a couple of art projects but with a couple of exceptions I have not done much. I feel that my last few days of freedom are slipping away. I have never been depressed and am usually a very optimistic and energetic person, but I wonder whether hormones are to blame or whether this is pre-natal depresion symptoms. Physically I am ok, some aches and pains but nothing serious....I know I should be grateful that I got easily pg at the age of 38 and my DH and I do look forward to having a baby, but I am not in the happiest mood at the moment. Please tell me this will pass!

I'm only 11 wks, so I can't speak from experience of late pregnancy. But I can speak from experience of going from working around other people to suddenly spending time alone (working) at home. It can be quite a big adjustment and you can feel quite adrift and lacking motivation to start with. Plus, you're probably knackered and don't have much energy to motivate yourself to get on with your tasks?

Sometimes setting yourself small achievable tasks and establishing a routine, and forcing yourself to stick to it, helps. Eg. morning is for admin tasks and getting stuff done round the house; force yourself out for lunch; afternoon is for naps, reading, leisure activities, etc. I find making a mental plan the night before of the stuff I'll do, and when I'll do it, helps me stick to a routine. If I don't have a plan, then I fanny around all day long like nobody's business and then feel crap about myself by evening.

Thanks, CityDweller! Your last sentence described exactly how I've been feeling in the past few days! Great idea about breaking day into portions and allocating tasks to those times of the day - thank you; I'll start tonight with planning for tomorrow. It is a big adjustment, why did I not think about it myself? my job was (well, is) in a big bank, demanding and in a senior role; not that I miss it (not yet!) but it did provide routine and structure and communicaton. Thanks so much again!

Hey sweetie

I am 37 weeks also and have been off work a bit longer than you - also from a stressful busy high-stakes job (doc on an emergency unit). Mostly I have been able to be active and happy and busy but I definitely have days like you describe!

CityDweller's ideas of making a routine is something I find really helpful. In the morning I have breakfast with the boyfriend and when he goes to work I sit on my gym ball, put some tunes on, do my pelvic floor exercises and write a list of everything to do that day. I include all sorts of fun things, I include chores, and I include really stupid things like "shower". As the day goes on I enjoy crossing everything off and it's surprising how much I get done. I also seem to call my mates more and do more social stuff when I write down "call Tim" - this sounds so stupid but it really works for me.

I make myself go out every day without exception because for me being in the flat alone makes me go crazy. I don't always meet up with people - sometimes to buy food, sometimes I just go for a walk for an hour or two (don't know how your pregnancy is treating you on this front, I can still walk ok - slowly!) I don't think walking at 2 mph qualifies as endorphins but it still makes me feel better.

I also found when I stopped work I cried for 2 days straight and did NOTHING. Maybe you are still winding down. That's ok.

Also 8 and a half months pregnant isn't anyone's best or most productive time! The waiting game is hard work, even if we have lots to be thankful for (I have also had a very troublefree pregnancy, apart from trying to have it running around after emergencies.) Try and be kind to yourself. Everything's going to change really soon!!

Squidkid - many thanks. Today is already better than the past few days. Decided not to beat myself about what has not been done and concentrate instead on what I can achieve in the day (plus prioritising). Grateful to both you and Citydweller for helping me distill/separate the feelings and emotions about the way I pass my days and the way I feel about motherhood. Thanks a lot!!

I'm finding I feel rubbish first thing in the morning (40 wks tomorrow), but am ok if I get up and go out for the day. Keeping busy in the sunshine is the best thing!