People's reasoning behind wanting an Epidural?

[Spice17]

Following on from my earlier thread about being gutted about my birth options, it's got me thinking about reasons why I might be considering an Epidural e.g. really trying to think about and understand why I might want it, my reasoning etc.

I just wondered if anyone else is mainly considering it/had it previously for the same reason as me - for the possible tearing and stitching afterwards?

I think it's what I'm most scared of, much more than any pain during labour, feel I can cope with that but am pretty scared of feeling the tear and stitching after.

Can anyone offer any pearls of wisdom re this? Do you 'feel' the tearing or does the pain all merge into one? Will I even be that bothered at the end?

I'm thinking a natural water birth feels 'do-able' but that bit is stopping me somehow........

Hi op, I've not read your other thread, but I had a water birth with DS and although I had a second degree tear I didn't know about it until I was having a cup of tea in bed and my midwife said "I'll need to do your stitches soon"! If you do tear it'll only be a second and it's done, IMO once the babies head is out, that's the hardest bit done!

I remember at my NCT course, on day one we talked all about relaxing through labour and how your body is designed to deal with it, and I came out of the session thinking "Yeah, I can do this" - and then the next day we talked about tearing and the like and I came out of that session thinking "fuck that, I'm having an epidural..."

Hopefully people who have experienced this will come and tell you helpful experiences, but I just wanted to say that you wouldn't be the first person to think that!

I suffered a third degree tear giving birth to my son in my lovely water birth. I can honestly say that I didn't feel it and I had no pain relief apart from a little gas and air (I didn't find it useful) earlier in my labour. I ended up with an epidural and in theatre for my stitches though. I think the adrenaline of the baby emerging really overwhelmed the pain of the tear. It hurt being examined afterwards to see the damage and I had gas and air for that even though I'm not sure it really worked.

I can honestly say that having an epidural out of fear of tearing again wouldn't be for me. I'm currently 2 days overdue with DC2 and hoping to have another water birth, hopefully without the tearing this time!

See how it goes and do what's right for you when you are in labour.

I thought I'd be able to cope with the pain and really, really wanted a gas 'n' air only water-birth, but when it came to it, I couldn't cope and I took the epidural.

Whatever happens, don't feel guilty or a failure if you do go for it. At the end of the day, it fucking hurts. A lot. You might have a pain threshold that means you can manage it without the injection, but don't beat yourself up if you don't.

I haven't had an epidural, though with both previous births I did tear and need stitching. I did both labours without any pain relief and certainly didn't feel when the year happened, was concentrating so much on pushing baby that I wasn't aware of it. After both I was given a needle to numb everything down there while they stitched me and although it was uncomfortable I didn't feel any pain while they were stitching. Hope that reassures you a little.

You get a local for the stitches and gas and air - I've had 2 second degree tears neither hurt when they happened or when they were stitched.

You may find that they turn off the epidural, supposing you had one, when pushing anyway to help you feel the sensation.

I had an epidural with dd1 due to being induced and nothing at all with speedy dd2, and my second birth was easier.

Water certainly helped me manage the pain, and no, I don't think you give a toss about anythig when in labour except

a) when will it end
b) is the baby okay

If your early labour is lasting a long time and you're not progressing and your shattered tbh you want an epidural because you have no idea how much long (hours,days?) you are going to be in that sort of pain for!!!

I had epidurals with my first 3 births, didn't need it with my 4th mainly because I was so much more relaxed about the whole thing tbh

I forgot to add, I had gas and air for pain relief.

I really think you just do whatever you need to do at the time as you don't know how you'll feel at the time. Do whatever gets you through and don't worry.

I had epidurals with both my births. First one worked a treat, couldn't feel the pain just the tightening. I hated gas and air as I felt so out of it and the epidural gave me back control. I ha an episiotomy and didn't feel that or the stitches. Second time round again I asked for an epidural as I don't like gas and air except it failed to do anything other than give me pins and needles in my bum so I still had to use the gas and air. I had a 3nd degree tear which I didn't feel particularly. I'm assuming I tore during the final big push then body was born and baby put on me so immediately all pain forgotten. They then stitched me up with a local anesthestic so I didn't feel it. If I had a third DC I wouldn't rule out an epidural but would be a last resort as I'm very aware of the fact they don't always work.

I would have liked a water birth but first time had syntocin drip and second time had monitoring due to waters breaking 2 days before contractions. If you have a water birth and you don't like it you can get out and try something else or have an epidural. Good luck.

*3nd? I'm making up new sequences. It should say 2nd.

Hi OP...Truthful and no-holds barred answers for you.

I've had 3dc, 1 epidural (with the first) due to being told that ds was back to back DURING labour. I'd had no hard and fast rules with the birth plan, past getting the baby out so I was not too bothered either way. I had the epi, it numbed half of me, ds came out with salad server forceps and episiotomy. BUT he was impossible to push...no feeling at the very bottom end (although could feel half of all contractions....v weird!) and I found it blinking hard going...pelvic floor shot for weeks. I tried without for dd1 as I wanted to experience it (only had tens machine).....OK, it hurts like a bastard....really, seriously, f/ing kills and yes I did notice the crowning and the 2nd degree tear.....she came out hand and head first so probably didn't help much. Pelvic floor fine though and far less exhausted as a really quick labour. With dd2, no epidural but tens again, loads of pain but no abysmally appalling crowning/tearing pain (only a grade 1) - just the usual f/ing awful pain (!!) but again fast recovery. Without the epidural I felt in control, very stroppy (earth mothery....very much 'in the moment') and gave birth on all 4 on a bed....much better - don't lie down for goodness sake as it's much quicker on all 4's and good if you're impatient like me!

If I had to do it all again I would have no rules - try without an epi but if it gets too bad, go for it....no shame (really, seriously) If I'd thought I had time for an epi with no3 I might have gone for it, but it turned out to be the most bearable of all of them. The one thing is though that it's really quick in the scheme of things and all seems perfectly reasonable when you see what turns up at the end! Try not to stress and don't put pressure on yourself to be superwoman or to decide. No matter what happens, they're totally worth it a thousand birth times over.....

I had an epidural for my 1st labour. I was 18 and I honestly don't think I would have coped with the whole experience without it (I was lucky and didn't tear so can't comment on that but.) Labour afterwards was pretty much pain free, I even remember singing along to the radio!
I'm now 31 and 14 wks with my 2nd. I'm not planning on having an epidural this time though as I'm hoping I'll be able to deal with the pain and the emotions it brings on........however if it turns out I can't then I'll probably be begging for one!

I had gas & air with DS. I had a 2nd degree tear, but I didn't notice this happening, given everything else that was going on at the time.

I was given a local anasthetic when the tear was stitched up, so I didn't feel the stitching happening either.

PS - I felt the stitching on the dds (no2 and3) Not great but doable and fine with gas and air (even though I hated G&A during the labour as it made me feel out of control)

do-able

It's good to think about your preferences prior to the birth but I wouldn't make any decisions until it happens. I swore blind I wouldn't have an epidural but ended up having one after 3 days of back to back labour.
I had a 2nd degree tear and wasn't aware of it.. It's just totally painful anyway. Like an earlier poster said, they tend to turn the epidural off when it's time to push so I felt everything. The epidural was really only used so I could have a rest before pushing.
another thing to consider is that an epidural can actually increase your risk of tearing, especially If you have no sensation when pushing.
They gave me gas and air and local when they did the stitching as the epidural had been turned off.
Anyway, next time round I would def plan to have no plan , go with the flow and do what you need to as it occurs. Hope this helps and good luck

The pain of labour is so intense that you won't feel any tearing. The midwife told me that I was tearing quite badly so she decided to perform an episiotomy whoch would make stiching easier for her. Until she told me I hadn't had the slightest idea that I was tearing! And this was without pain relief. Before stitching she used a needle with unaesthetic. She started stitching me STRAIGHT AWAY!!! I felt the needle and the stiching but with absolutely no pain at all!

I have actually heard of women taking 2 hours pushing a premature baby and tearing/needing episiotomy because they had had an epidural and couldn't feel when to push.

I think that what you should be asking is from all the women who had had tearing or episiotomies how many of them have incotinence. It is rarely mentioned but an epiosiotomy can really damage your pelvic floor I had a small part left that hadn't dilated but I was still trying to push as I couldn't help it, although the midwife kept telling me that I was not ready yet. She never told me how to breath it in as if I should have known it! It only happened the first time though.

The problem with an epidural is it can make you more likely to need intervention (forceps/ventouse).

Not read all replies but here is my experience.

I was also most worried about tearing / episiotomy before the birth as I imagined this would be the worst thing to happen but when I was in labour with DS (in hospital and had an epidural) and pushing and they asked to do an episiotomy I frankly couldn't care less, I had much bigger things on my mind! The recovery afterwards was tough for a couple of weeks but it does recover.

With DD (born at home with TENS machine only) I didn't need an episiotomy and just had a small tear (so no stitches) and recovered so much better, but again in the midst of giving birth this was the furthest thing from my mind!!

DD was born whilst I was on all fours and this is meant to be one of the best positions to give birth as it opens your pelvis much more than lying on your back (which I was doing with DS!)

HTH and good luck, its an amazing experience and despite all the pain I would do it again in a heartbeat

I only tore with my first dc and that was the only time I had an epidural
Well it was an episiotomy (they were routine then)

Are tears more common if you do have an epidural? Genuine question, I don't know the answer.

I didn't have epidurals with DCs 4&5 because I had home births. If I had to be transsfered I would have screamed 'epi me!!!!!!!!' as they wheeled me in.

If I had to put up with being in a hospital I would have taken full advantage of the pain relief

Thank you everyone.

Long story short, thought I could have a try it all birth, bit of pool, get out if I wanted to try something else e.g Epidural etc but fairly unsure if that's possible/realistic where I'm going (only found out through antenatal class today at 34+5) I bet I sound like a right plum for being so naive!

So now trying to fiure out what's most important to me, it's very hard! I felt in control and happy after reading my hypnobirthing book but am now feeling the anxiety creep back. Going to phone MW tomorrow to discuss I think.

Thanks again :)

I can't really understand why anyone wouldn't want an epidural to be honest (unless they are having a home birth). I had an epidural and my reasoning was nothing to do with tearing etc; it was simply that I did not want to feel unnecessary pain. The epidural was bloody fantastic, didn't feel a thing, very comfortable and the birth was quick (first DC, only got one). I had a small tear I think, obviously didn't feel it (or the stitching).

My reasons for not wanting an epidural were that I hate to feel out of control and thought of being bed bound makes me feel sick. There are also serous risks with an epidural. And I wanted to go to the lovely new birthing centres were an epidural wasn't an option.

spice the pain is different for everyone. The reality is you really won't know until you're in labour whether you need an epidural or not.

I really wasn't at all keen on getting one. However the pain for me was immense, way more than I'd imagined and it quickly became obvious to me that I needed one. However there was reasons for my birth being painful - that I was induced, my baby was big.

There's every possibility that the pain you experience in your labour may be absolutely manageable. It is not about your ability to tolerate pain IMO. As every pregnancy is different so is every birth. There is a massive difference in the pain people experience, which depends on all sorts of factors. Hypnobirthing techniques and being the in the right frame of mind undoubtedly are a good thing, but it's not the whole story. There are so many other factors - size and position of the baby being two obvious ones of course

I wouldn't shut yourself off from being able to get an epidural if you feel you need one. It's a back up plan, in case the pain really is that bad. It should be a reassurance to you that you won't have to endure immense pain if you don't want to.

I'm not trying to scare you, I hope I'm not - I wish people had been a bit more honest with me!

never had an epidural but I had an episiotomy with my first which was horrendous. I had pethedine and gas & air. with second I had a water birth and just gas & air, i had a first degree tear which I only knew about after the fact. I refused stitches and it healed really well.
I am 33+5 with my third and hoping for just a water birth with gas and air again.
I would very strongly advise against pethedine as it took my son ages to come round and be able to breast feed. he was very sleepy. my daughter was feeding within 20 minutes of being born and was so much more alert.