paternity leave?

[LackingNameChangeInspiration]

hi
how long is your OH taking and when is it starting?
thanks

I'm only 13 weeks so a long way off for me yet but my OH is entitled to take 6 weeks, add on a bit of annual leave and 2 months will be possible......

2 weeks, starting from whenever the baby arrives I guess

wow 6 weeks! is that in the UK?
(don't think DH will get cover for that long but its good to know what others are getting so we can get an idea of the average)

we will need to book it in advance as DH will need cover, anyone else book it in advance and when do you start? 40weeks?

Mine isn't taking any as he works for himself but he works from home so he will be able to help me if I need anything but not sit around looking at the baby or me or being about unless he is especially needed.

yep six weeks, works in the voluntary sector, we're in Scotland. I think we're pretty lucky to be honest

2 weeks but he's going to tag a fortnights holiday onto it so we'll have a month together.

2 weeks (employers are legally obliged to give this) and then when I go back to work after 6 months he is taking another 6 months ie we are sharing the year we are entitled to between us.

Mine is taking 2 weeks. Paternity 'pay' is rubbish so he's taking 2 weeks from his annual leave. The company is really lovely and it's going to start from whenever I go into labour, rather than having to book in advance, even though he'll need cover (shop manager).

DH isn't entitled to anything as he's self employed (but has a boss and needs to arrange cover in advance) so trying to get an idea of how much he should take as there's no policy as such.

How does 40weeks sound for a start date?

You risk baby being induced at 41+5, and him going back when baby is 2 days old.

Equally, what would happen if baby came early - say 37 weeks. You'd have 3 weeks without him, but I think that would be preferable to the alternative! What happens if you go into labour before 40 weeks? Will you deliver on your own, or would someone be there with you?

What arrangements would be in place if his was off sick? Thats what we implement if someone is off on paternity. The date is always specified as "when the wife goes into labour"

Sorry, thats all sounding very negative, but its more like a list of things to consider.

Wishing you a stress free pregnancy

if he's off sick and his customers aren't happy to wait to see him, he looses business and money and spends the next couple of weeks clawing it back, if he missed appointments because I was actually in labour then I'm sure his customers would understand, but he can't start a 2 week period off at short/no notice he'ld loose far too much money, business and goodwill with all the people he'ld made appointments with for that time

DC1 was born at 40 weeks, if I get to 41 weeks I'll have a CS in the next couple of days not induction so unlikely to get anywhere near 42 (under consultant care)

I'm thinking it might be better even if I did have this baby early, for him to just cancel that day and the next and book everyone in in spaces later that week, then take the 2 weeks a week later or whatever when there is proper arranged cover and his costomers for that longer period have been given the option of waiting for him or seeing his cover??

So long as I'm out of hospital I don't mind waiting a few days for him to be off - I'ld rather that than waste his leave on staring at my bump!

It's tricky but I do think your strategy sounds like a sensible one given the circumstances - plan it for 40 weeks and take a couple of days off for the labour if that happens earlier. Fingers crossed baby won't be very overdue, but maybe you could arrange for a bit more than 2 weeks cover?

Ok, with that information, and the fact this is baby 2, it sounds sensible. Maybe even from 41 weeks, if that is the latest baby will be delivered.

Have you got someone nearby who can look after your oldest if you need a little help?

not really got anyone local but some local doulas do post natal mothers help stuff for about £10/hr and DS has a pre-school place which DH can drop to on his way to work

DH is worried about bonding with the baby as with no1 he was part time and had loads of time at home with him, and with this baby he's working 6 days a week so I really don't want him missing out on any baby time by going off too early! - I'ld rather pay for a bit of extra babysitting/maybe even cleaning, so I can have a rest while I'm waiting to give birth than take away any of DH's paternity time off while I'm "just" pregnant!

How much control does he have over his appointments? Could he keep his schedule lighter between 38 and 42 weeks and do more office/admin work. Or alternatively warn customers when booking over that period that there's a chance he might be on paternity leave...I'm sure the majority would be understanding if he then needed to postpone.

DH took 2 weeks.

The SPP form states it cannot be taken until the date the baby is born, so the father can't legally be on PL unless you've had the baby - my two were 16 and 11 days late respectively, if DH had had to take it from the EDD then he'd have been back at work before DD was even born!

if he books less people in, he makes less money and returns from PL to a half dead buisness He doesn't make a penny unless he sees customers, he's not salaried