Pg after mc and long TTC - emotions?

[philbee]

Hi. I found out I was pg at the weekend. Early days yet but v happy. We've been trying for over a year, following a mc last summer. I had an appointment for fertility clinic coming up, and when I called to cancel today found it hard to keep back the tears.

I am finding it very confusing, although am fairly calm about another mc. At least I know there's nothing I can do to influence or prevent one. But the idea of having to go through that again is awful. And I guess the appointment was a kind of control. I don't know.

Anyone else in a similar position? How do you feel, emotionally?

A wreck! But only sometimes.

I had a MMC and a MC then two years of nothing, we had an appointment for going ahead with IVF and then out of nowhere I was pregnant. It's still early days, I'm only 13 weeks but I have been all over the place emotionally since I found out.

I found the only thing that kept me sane was paying for a couple of private scans to reassure myself that everything was fine.

It's still worrying some days as I just feel like this is my miracle baby.

I hope you have a really boring pregnancy!

Hi philbee I'm not in a similar position but wanted to say congratulations and wish you a trouble-free and lovely pregnancy xxx

Congratulations philbee - what lovely news after some very hard times for you. I really hope it all goes well for you.

I had a MC last year at 14 weeks, expected to fall PG again quickly but it took us a year. I was happy and terrified in equal measure to fall PG again in December. What helped keep me calm was talking to DH, writing a blog about my experience and my feelings, taking each day at a time and thinking 'for today I am PG' (recommended by someone on here) and like Inchy I had a private scan at 10 weeks which helped a little.

I'm 34 weeks now and still have moments of anxiety, but I remind myself that the huge majority of pregnancies end with little bouncing babies, and that while unfortunately MC can be quite 'common' (don't like that word as it's so horrid to have a MC and people's experiences can be very different) it is 'uncommon' to have more than one.

Hey, just stay calm its the best thing to do :). I had a miscarriage at 23weeks on April 6th this year... I found out 2weeks ago I was pregnant, i freaked out.. I get scans every month after 12 weeks due to a weak cervix and swabs at 20&24weeks because i had an infection. But know I think there's no point being scared. I had heavy bleeding this weekend went for a scan and there's a bleed next to the baby and the baby has moved to the middle of my womb..... the baby was fine when I got a scan all I've done is think positive and its working I've stopped bleeding :). Sorry for the essay, every pregnancy is different think positive and don't get stressed :). X

I'm scared because after 12 weeks I'm not out of the danger some because I could have a late miscarriage again but I just say no its not going to happen this baby is staying in me! It's his due date tomorrow (called him Riley-Lee) I don't know how to feel.. I'm ment to be 40weeks and im only 6 weeks? I have my boyfroend, were having a picnic at his grave tomorrow and redecorating it that keeps me going. If you need a chat mail me if you can on here :) x

I just found out at the weekend that I'm pregnant too after having a miscarriage last Summer.

I am trying not to think about it happening again but every time I go to the toilet I am almost too scared to wipe in case I see signs of blood. I am still trying to get my head round being pregnant and don't want to become too emotionally attached to this pregnancy in case the same thing happens again but that is easier said than done.

I'm like you in thinking that there is nothing I can do if it happens again and at least I know what to expect if it does.

I have been all over the place emotionally with this pg. We have been trying for 2 yrs for dc2 and I have had 3 mcs. I'm currently 17 wks today and still trying to get my head round that it might actually work out for us this time. The only advice I can give is to just take each day at a time. I was (and to a point now am still) quite detached from the pregnancy and thought whatever will be, will be. Although, I have allowed myself to feel the joy and excitement that we're expecting again I felt I have had to hold back on those feelings. I dont as much now as I want to enjoy this pg and feel positive. Big hugs to you and congratulations. x

Hi sweetie, I'm in the same position as you. Had two miscarriages, one pretty late, and now I'm 9+1 and it's the scariest time of my entire life. I'm losing a lot of sleep because I'm just lying awake worrying and feeling anxious - I know that won't help my baby but I can't seem to stop. It also doesn't help that I've had spotting/small amounts of bleeding every few days. Every time I wipe and I see blood (especially when it's red) I just close my eyes and pray and wish and hope...

Honestly, I've never been so terrified. I really know what you're going through. I hope you've got someone you can talk about it to, and I would recommend telling maybe your mum but nobody else. I'm considering going for a private scan in a couple of weks just because my dating scan isn't until 13 weeks and I don't know if I can wait that long to find out everything is okay.

Good luck, and think positive :)

Thank you all. Everyone has really been through the mill, haven't they? I like the advice to take one day at a time. That's what I'm trying to do at the moment, feel happy for that day, I am pg, it's ok to feel happy even if it doesn't work out etc. I'm not sure about earlier scans. My mc was a mmc - I started bleeding at 12+1 and had an emergency scan. I'm not sure an early scan would reassure me that much. Although I guess it would tell me that things were going normally, which they weren't last time.

We have told parents and siblings, but no one else. We have a DD already (should have said that, sorry) and haven't told her either.

I really feel calmer this time. Last time I agonised over every little twinge and kept asking DH if he thought it was alright. Now I now that the first sign is unlikely to be twinges, more likely to be bleeding, so I've been able to just let them come and go a bit more. But it is still pretty emotional. Thanks all for your support. It's good to know there are other people out there going through similar things.