come and chat with me about homebirth prep

[soandsosmum]

I'm planning a homebirth in Nov/Dec with dc2.

I almost had one last year with dd1 but after pushing for hours my contractions started to wane so I transferred and had dd about 5 mins after arriving at hosp. Unfortunately she had a hand up by her head and that contributed to a third degree tear and a 3 day stay in hosp.

I hope to complete at home this time, and plan to get a pool and tens to use alongside hypnobirthing techniques, as I did last time.

Are you planning a homebirth or had one and have tips? I'd love some company as I prepare as I don't know anyone close who's had one.

My first dilema is where to put the pool this time as last time we used the nursery, but obviously dd1 is there now!

I'm 38+2 and hoping for a homebirth.

DH is panicking that we won't have room for the pool. I think he is visualising an Olympic sized one. I've had to reassure him that it's not designed to be big enough to do laps in! I've hired a tens machine. Sceptical of how useful it'll be but I figure it'll be a distraction if nothing else.

Not told the parents or the inlaws because of the cats bum faces I'm sure I'd get if I did. It's my second, last labour was long and ended up with pet hiding, epidural and the threat of ventouse ( which thankfully I didn't need in the end). I'd really like to avoid all that this time and think the best place to do it is away from hospital. Although, if I end up in hospital, I'll be disappointed but I'm not single mindedly determined to stay at home. That first night in hospital was the most horrible ever. I was utterly knackered, left alone in a hospital room, DH had had to go home. Got woken up two hours after falling asleep by a screaming noisy thing and I had no idea what to do with it. It was a horrible, lonely night. I really would like to be at home and in my own bed with my husband.

How did the hypnotist thing go last time for you? Its something I haven't actually considered this time around. Possibly too late for me now?!

Pethidine, not pet hiding. Although probably would have had to hide the cats from the midwives if I'd decided to take them with me!

Aaaaaaargh, hypnobirthing. Not hypnotist! Stupid iPad. I really should preview my posts.

Hi. I'm hoping for a homebirth (if my stupid low-lying placenta shifts) in Nov with #2. I had a straight forward delivery with DD but felt that the adrenaline produced by the frantic rush to hospital after my waters had broken, where I turned out to be 9cm only an hour or 2 after I'd been in with regular contractions and only 1cm, really slowed things down. Plus being made to labour prone on a bed for 2hrs pushing isn't something I care to repeat.

I found it strange that I was left in a bed, unable to move properly due to a catheter, couldn't adjust the bed as it didn't work so had to sit up all night!! Could barely reach the call button either. Generally a very miserable experience. Left within 24hrs of my admission...

There have been quite a few threads on this in the Childbirth forum, discussing what you need, birthing pools etc.

haha pickle - i post on my phone and have the same probs!

I found the TENS helpful last time from about 10 hours in (I had a long labour, in book anyway, 23 hours, long enough!).

Hypnobirthing was brilliant. I found my hubby working with me on each contraction SO good, I'm not a hero but didnt feel the need to scream or shout at all, and I was surprisingly calm and happy when transferring to hosp, which I'd expected to find distressing.

I did mongan method course with book and cd and will be doing a 'top up' in the autumn. never too late, i'd say. get the book and cd online if you can and practise the relaxation techniques.

thanks chunkychicken I'll check out the childbirth forum
I found staying in hosp miserable too. I hope your low-lying placenta moves for you

Usually quite a few current-ish home birth threads in 'childbirth' but just wanted to add here - very best wishes for your birth.

I had a home birth with DC2 and it really was everything we'd hoped for. Calm, relaxed, stress free, wonderful experience. Climbing into bed with DH and newborn with tea and toast at 3.30am was fab. Much better than being abandoned in a hospital ward.

Didn't use a pool but would have put it in dining room if we'd had one or having seen size of my friends birthing pool it probably would fit in living room with slight rearranging of furniture. I preferred to give birth downstairs - more space for pacing about.

TENS rules for me.

Hi - nothing useful to add but watching with interest as due in jan and would love to use hypnobirthing and also looking into home birth as an option (although think I would lucky to be allowed)

The comments about Olympic pools, pet hiding and cat bum faces gave me a laugh at a time when I really needed cheering up - thanks for the comedy!

I'm not pregnant it's been a while for me but I had a wonderful home birth with dc 2.

It took less than 3 hours and it was so nice to be able to go to bed in my own bed. Ds who was 7 at the time slept through it all and I had 2 baths!!
It was so nice introducing him to his little sister when he woke up.

I'm hoping to have a homebirth with DC2 in December. Planning to use a pool too. Although there will be plenty of room for it downstairs, I was wondering if you need to set it up in advance (not sure we'll be able to keep DS out of it ) and how long it'll take to fill - do you need to start filling it up from the first twinge?

Also trying to work out what will be the best plan for DS who will have just turned 3. My mum will look after him, but not sure if it would really work with them staying uostairs as I was rather ahem vocal last time and would probably traumatise the boy for life. He does spend lots of time at my parents' house so would be fine going there, but if he ends up staying overnight (depending on timing) then I'd feel like he'd had almost as much disruption as he would if I went to hospital, which is one of the things I want to avoid.

Aargh - so much to think about! Look forward to seeing other people's suggestions and tips for planning.

Hi ispy

We used a pool last time. It took ages to fill but that's because of the way our hot water works. Dh spent time in advance filling the bath and estimating from that how long it would take.

My q is when to fill it this time as I'm told (and an very much hoping) stage 1 should be lots quicker with dc2. And I'd like to use it earlier.

My dd1 will be 18m and dm lives 2hours away so we too need plans for childcare. I'm hoping to be able to call on good friends, although Dh is v cautious about who looks after dd1. Currently only one friend and my mum :O

Thanks brighter and moon for your support and encouragement

Oooooh, we've just taken the birth pool out to figure out how it works to save a mid-labour panic. It comes with a cup holder! Reckon using G+T's as pain relief instead of gas and air would be frowned upon?!

Chunky chicken I am in same boat re low lying placenta. I am 33 weeks so got a scan in 3 weeks then if they give me the all clear, I am going for home birth. I have already transferred to the team and met the home birth midwives. What like about it is that it's the same 2 midwives who will do all my appointments post 36 weeks and be at the birth and I can always transfer in.
The birth pool is a conundrum. The baby's father doesn't want to be involved so I don't have someone to set it up or clear it away. That really puts me off. Will the bath have the same effect in terms of pain relief? I was never thinking of giving birth in the water...

Fingers crossed for you then Polly :) I didn't even think twice about water with my DD but during labour, DH said 'try having a bath'. It was wonderful. I want to be able to spend longer in there this time, hence the birthing pool. However, AFAIK they don't let you in the pool until you're in "established" labour, in case it slows things down, but will recommend a bath. So Polly, a bath might be a good option.

From a Midwives POV try and get in some cheap shower curtains (99p shop stylee) in case you want to get out of the pool at anytime, or to push. Saves your carpet / bed

Thanks chunkychicken! You too. Good to know re the bath. Seems like it might be the easiest option.
I heard cheap shower curtains too. I will watch this thread with interest, see what else people say you need.

I've had two homebirths. Birth pool at the ready both times ... but didn't have time to use it As long as you've got old sheets to pop over the bed/sofa/wherever; some bottled water/juice to keep you going, clothes for baba, towels, you should be fine. That's all I had anyway. The first time, the midwife didn't arrive in time But all was ok, luckily. Second time, she arrived just in time to welcome DD3 to the world! I had no painkillers - not because I didn't ask for any, but nobody was here do give it to me, ha! 'Tis a lovely feeling to give birth - but the experience I had giving birth at home (looking bach at it - I was stressed at the time!) I still get a warm fuzzy feeling in my belly. And I can tell DD2 and DD3 in the future that they were born in that exact spot

Oh, and make sure you've got some cleaning products around - for your hubby or midwives to clear up afterwards. And an empty washing machine, to throw the old sheets in after giving birth. I personally just binned them. Good luck!

I've had one fab homebirth (DC3) and planning another for DC4 in Jan.

We put the pool in our bedroom which worked well, I'll have to get a new one as that one has become a (much-envied by neighbours - well until I tell them it was a birth pool) summer garden toy and has had a puncture!

I did my own take on hypnobirthing, basically relaxation and focussing on 'opening up', I read Ina May Gaskin's books which while slightly dated in style, are really inspiring - really opened my eyes (and my mind!).

I will start proper anticipation / planning after summer holidays.

eagleray - you don't need to be 'allowed' a homebirth, it's your choice, you can weigh up the pros and cons for your own case. Doctors/MWs like to be sure you are making an informed choice. Message me if you want to ask anything!

I'm definitely going to get a pool as I found the bath cramped last time.

I also love Ins Mays book.

Pickle sarnie: I am with you on that lonely first night on your own with the baby in hospital. . . And it doesn't have to be that way. Do mention this to mw as part of your motivation, as if a transfer to hospital happens, they sometimes give you a private room and let partner stay overnight. (I was very when another mum told me this had happened when her home birth ended up in hospital) good luck to all, hope you'll have some very special experiences.

I've had one homebirth and plan to have another in January! No particular advice to give above what bettyboop said, the nice thing about hb is that if one room / snack / clothing doesn't cut it at the time, you can just move on to another. Good to alert neighbours / nearby friends if you need any last minute help (after our dd was born all the lights fused and our neighbour came forth with lots of lamps!). Yes, that's a tip! Don't give birth directly above a light fitting without adequate plastic sheeting down!

Second tip is that I got a number of old towels via freecycle which I could happily throw away afterwards.

Good luck! I can really recommend it.

I've never had a home birth but would like to consider it if I were to have another. Although I've been worried that they wouldn't allow me to have a home birth as I too had a 3rd degree tear as dd's arm was in the way!

Please let us know how you get on when the time comes.

I can't think of anything better than to sit with your newborn in the comfort of your own home!

Hi Ladies,

I'll join you on this thread. Planning a home birth for DC2 due end of Oct. Had a straightforward birth centre water birth for DS so really hoping all will go as smoothly this time. Also a hypnobirthing fan but havent done any practise this time so far! Finding it so different 2nd time round, barely get the chance to remember that I'm pregnant never mind finding time to relax and focus on birth. Must try to make more time to relax and get in the right head space.
Also wondering about what to do with DS - we are fairly new to the city we live in and I don't really have a support network of friends and relatives nearby. Have sort of decided that my mum will come over from Ireland to be around and be on hand for him when I do go into labour, but that involves booking flights for a specific date and of course, we have no idea when baby plans to make an appearance!

Good tip about the freecycle towels comeon maybe I should start gathering some up from charity shops.

I was just coming on to post a very similar q. We've just moved house and the new hospital seems very keen on home births. I'm expecting DC2 in late October so am coming round to thinking this might be a nice idea.

I had a 2nd degree tear and was induced but they keep telling me it'll be different this time. I do hope so.

DC2 is currrently breech though so I'd guess I need to encourage them to turn?

I've just given away all our old towels so we didn't have to move house with them, I wonder if they've been used on my uncle's dog yet!