Anyone else just realised they are actually going to have to give birth!?

[mummyfirsttime]

Im 35+2 I becoming more aware that I will actually have to give birth. I know that sounds a bit stupid how else will i meet my beautiful baby but very scared now. Anyone else feeling like this? How do I stop the worry that everything will go wrong??

x

Oh mummy I well remember that feeling.
It is a shock, isn't it
You won't stop the worry but you might make yourself feel better by making sure you and any birth partner are confident with communicating your birth plan.
I am sure it will all be fine, try to relax, you must be getting very tired by now.

I'm 26 weeks. I just realised today! How silly is that!!! Erm...I have no advice, but I just keep thinking of all of the millions of women who have done it before us, and a lot of them go on to have second and third babies..so it can't be all that bad?! clutching at straws

I'm 35+0 and totally understand! It feels so real now. I feel really apprehensive but trying to focus on the baby rather than the birth. Scary times!

I was so focussed on the actually giving birth bit, that it hadn't occurred to me that I'd have an actual baby at the end of it.

She's 12 now, so it's worked out ok, but I think your way round makes WAY more sense!

Good luck

scaredymcnamechange - Yes big shock!! Part of me wants the baby here now cant wait to meet him/her but the other half is saying are you crazy enjoy the time before the pain of labour! very tired im still at work for this week and next before mat leave starts but so far have not managed in this week

Wow thank god its not just me! I was thinking to my self seriously you need to get a grip you have had 31 weeks (we found out at 4 weeks) to get your head round. Instead i have focussed on buying pretty things decorating house sorting out finances I now have nothing else to worry/stress about except labour! Also being told by Dr that I will not go over due date due to GD has made things really real!!
Stargirl your right focus on the baby focus on the baby focus on the baby...

Me too :(

Some days I am actively looking forward to birth...not just to meeting our baby but getting down and feral during the labour too!

But then these last few days, I feel really apprehensive about it. I keep thinking about the last bit - it's the only bit I am fearful of. The crowning scares me.

Days like these I look at every mother I see in the street and think 'Oh god I have to do that". But you know, conversely, every mother we all see did it, got through it, probably did it again :)

I'm only 8 weeks pregnant and don't plan to give it much thought until the day, it's no coincidence that I'm 37 and on my first because it terrifies me!

Everywhere I look now I see babies and can't help but think how the hell do you get those shoulders out of a teeny hole?!

I had a mini meltdown about it at about 24 weeks. I have to give birth twice! Am shitting myself!

congatulations mummy
im 24weeks with DD2 and i remember that feeling very well!
im still feeling a bit like that this time round too

i had to have an emergency section with DD1 (please don't worry that you will have problems cos everyone's experience is different!) and this time it will be a planned section so its all mapped out, but im still feeling all-butterflies and nervous and excited. i think its all part of it regardless of your birth plan and keeps you going when your ankles swell up and you struggle getting out of a chair

Oh yes, I recall!

I was always scared of the whole thought of birth- and I never saw beyond that bit. I was utterly pretrified for the first pg. I remember at about 6 months, walking back from the shops, feeling so ill. I thought 'I just want to run away. But no matter where I go, the baby has to come too'. There is a point where you think 'this ends only one way... giving birth'. It is terrifying!

To be honest though, by the end of it you are feeling so lousy and heavy you are desperate for the birth. I am sure it is natur'es way of having you think 'GOD, come ON!!!!'.

I have had the added trouble of having only having fairly complicated labours- but trust me, the fear is WAY worse than the reality. Particularly here in the UK.

(I also- the first time round used to comfort myself by measuring with my thumb the distance between bottom of belly to pubic bone... the baby only has to travel from here to here. Seriously- how hard can that be?'

It really will be okay. :)

Oh yeah.. and it really was bloody brilliant. It really is utterly amazing. :)

(And wait for about 4 days after when the adrenaline/hormones kicks in. you feel like a goddess. It is the most extraordinary experience ever.)

I had this feeling at about 30 weeks with the first 2, only 20 weeks this time, so still in denial Think about it this way, it can't be that bad or people wouldn't do it again. That must be why I'm on dc3, right?

Im 37+5 and this is my third, I would be lying if I said I wasn't nervous but i would go through labour 1000x over just to get the end result, that contented peaceful feeling you get after its all done and you can lay there at look over at your little bundle outweighs any amount of pain!!

Nope I'm 2 days overdue and still in denial hahaha but I know when it all kicks off I shall be shitting myself x

no I've been really curious about doing it again ever since I first did it. It's an odd experience. I look forward to it hugely as the only way out of pregnancy (which I hate) I'd much rather give birth every day for 40 weeks!

It will be OK

I'm 31 weeks and I suddenly had this thought about 2 weeks ago. Bit nervous about elements of birth (mainly the embarrassment of making weird noises, contorting my enormous naked body into weird positions to try and feel better, pooing myself etc!) but in the main I'm just trying to think:

1. It's only one day of pain and then you get the baby forever; and
2. Luckily it's a first world country so death in unlikely.

Seriously, those two thoughts keep calming me down

Honestly, it won't be as bad as you think, and mother nature is particularly helpful in this respect
First, by 40 weeks most women are so uncomfortable and so utterly sick of being pregnant that they are literally desperate for the baby to come out, even if that means going through the pain of labour. You only have to read the "get out get out" threads to see this
Second, you forget very quickly after the birth just how intense the pain is, until you have your first contraction in your second labour, and then you remember. I think it's like this because otherwise no one would ever have more than one child and the human race would have died out aeons ago.
I remember clearly having several really bad wobbly days about 34 weeks when I realised that labour wasnt actually 9 months away any more and it was going to happen soon, I think most people do, it's normal to be apprehensive about something you think is going to hurt a fair bit.
Couple of things I will say about it though, birth is a normal process. In the same way that having a giant poo hurts, but is still perfectly normal, so is labour and birth. Trust your body that it will do the job perfectly, there is no reason to suppose that it wont. Also, the level and intensity of pain varies massively from woman to woman. I found contractions very painful and was swearing and screaming by 5cm, and I walked round on a broken foot for a week and thought the pain was a bit annoying. My other friend who has been known to faint in pain from a stubbed toe, had 2 babies and both times she arrived at the hospital mildy uncomfortable to be told she was 9cm and had to speed waddle to the labour ward to get on the bed before the baby crowned. You just can't tell how you will cope with the pain, or even if you will find it painful at all. Lastly, if you feel you can't cope with the pain there is gas and air, pethidine and epidural as your safety nets. With dd2 i went from screaming in agony to calmly watching the women's wimbledon tennis final within 15 minutes of having an epidural. She was born as they were awarding the trophy, it was a very good match i remember it clearly.

I remember this. The fear. It's normal and part of preparing for birth.

You will be fine. You may well surprise yourself by how well you do and it all fades to nothing when you look into your newborns eyes.