Err, how do you look after baby??!!

[Sastra]

So, as a quick search of my past posts will reveal, I know nothing about babies. I don't have any family around and no friends with little ones. I'm sure I'll end up disregarding what the books say but right now, I'm feeling a bit panicky about having no idea how to keep her alive, let alone give her everythubg she needs to nurture her.

Can anyone recommend a decent book for someone with no experience of children and how to look after them, or even what to expect? Or any advice generally?

YYY to Lucy Atkins' First Time Parent, it is incredibly useful, doesn't subscribe to any particular style of parenting (routine, attachment etc) and isn't patronising, which I found some of the books were.

I'm also finding the Supernanny baby book very useful. It does contain some stuff on routines, but also has a very useful hints and tips section and some first aid information.

But believe me, you do just figure it out. You have a gut instinct about what your baby might need. We messed up for the first week or so at home (poor DD got NO sleep at all) but it all settled down and we do ok now.

However milky makes a good, suggestion - where are you, maybe you can meet some local MNetters?

You could ontact your local nct branch. They are likely to hold Bumps and Babes meet ups which are great.

I so know what you mean.
I thought I was going to have to put little post-it notes all over the house to tell me how to look after the baby.
But honestly, pretty soon you're going to find yourself bombarded with info. Booklets, leaflets, posters, invitations to groups/classes, meeting other mums going through it at the same time, busybody well-meaning advice from family/friends.

I would recommend Baby Sense: Understanding Your Baby's Sensory World: the Key to a Contented Child by Megan Faure and Ann Richardson.
But I do also agree with Sandalwood - you will soon have info overload! My DH and I were completely and utterly clueless before DS was born but you learn so much so quickly from all sorts of these sources, and kind of try and test advice and see what works for your unique little one.

Thanks everyone, there's some great suggestions.

I'm in SE London...

Aha! I can personally vouch for the fact that SE London is the BEST place to know nothing about how to look after a baby

NCT does loads of different activities all over SE London (go here and type in your postcode) - nothing scary, just places you can turn up pretty much in your pyjamas, eat biscuits and cry ...

Also the most wonderful friendly BF support group in Deptford on a Tuesday ...

The Big Scream - take your baby to Greenwich cinema on a Friday morning ...

and lots of other stuff. Good luck Sastra - we've all been there and it's a loony place at first - but with support from friends and family you can make it through!

I was like you OP, but 6 weeks on and I think we're doing ok! I didn't get a book as you get given a lot of info and for everything else there's the Internet, including advice from distant relatives via Facebook. Plus the midwife and then health visitor came round regularly in the first week which helped to put my mind at rest as all my paranoid questions were met with a smile and a 'perfectly normal'

I have learnt that it is harder than I expected! They are all different but mine definitely cries more and sleeps less than I imagined. At first I hadn't got to grips with how often they feed, especially if BF, so could have saved myself some grief by just offering a feed instead of thinking 'well I fed him an hour ago, he can't be hungry' Haven't really got any 'tips' yet, but please be reassured, I had nothing to do with babies before DS came along and I'm managing. You'll be fine!

Haha, Zoob, that made me chuckle! Plus I'm a bit emotional at how kind everyone's being - damn hormones!

I was just like you - no friends or family with babies & I didn't know what on earth to expect! You'll have a lot of instincts that come naturally to you when your little one is born

Iam in East London
You'll think of this post when your LO is 6 months and smile fondly. You'll be great, PM if you'd like to meet up.
I have a 2.2 toddler who will chew your ear off and a 13 week old that will melt your heart with a smile !

Glad you started this thread OP, I have no idea either so my helpful post to you is - Just know that you are not alone I am also at a loss of what to do when my baby boy comes (currently 37+4), love him and hope that all follows naturally and if not there is your midwife for help and mums net is just a click away. I have found that people ar quick to respond & help on here :). Good luck x