Anyone else planning maternity nurse/nanny? Need advice please

[Emmiedarling]

I am having my first baby at the end of September. Im going to be a single mother with no family living close by.

I have recently done a budget and have £2,500 to pay someone to come in after the birth as I know I'm going to be petrified. (I've never even changed a nappy before)

I was hoping to find someone who could help establish a breast feeding/sleeping routine and perhaps look after baby whilst I have nap/shower/pop to the shops.

I live in a two bed flat and the second room is to be the nursery, so I only have a sofa bed in the living room.

I dont know if, therefore, it would be best to have someone come during the day...and what type of person (maternity nurse/doula) and as I only have limited funds what would be the best use of it.

Any thoughts? I dont even know where to look tbh. Oh im getting very nervous now!

Personally I think you should save your money.

Although, granted, being a single parent with a newborn is very hard work and tiring, I think if you have a stranger in the house it may effect how you bond with the baby- as you'll be given advice on how to do things which will come naturally to you once baby is here. Iyswim.

You might get someone who thinks baby's should be fed every two hours or not, regardless whether they show signs of wanting to be fed. Or someone who thinks if you let the baby fall asleep on you you'll be making a rid for your own back- that type of thing.

Can you ask your mw if any extra support is available to you immediately after the birth? Our mw came every day for ten days. But you could ask for extra support.

It's very scary having a baby but you will know what to do when baby arrives and it might be best that you start as you mean to go on. You'll kick yourself if you spend all that money employing someone when actually it is still you that has to do all the hard work anyway.

That's just my opinion. Good luck with baby though. X

I totally understand the fear! Although I do have a lovely DH, I have zero family, and my DH likely won't be around be able to be around for long, so i, too, am very much wondering about getting some extra help. We don't have massive funds to pay for it tough and nowhere for live-in help anyway, plus I do want to try and bond on our own a bit, so what i think we might try to do is get some of the temporary night nanny help for a couple ights a week, just to help with sleep and recovery at the start. It is a difficult thing though, since as the other poster says you need to make sure you are compatible with whoever it is, and have rhe same philosophy re feeding etc etc. the other complicated thing seems to be the employment thing, since one pays PAYE if it is a nany (though sometimes it is different if you are actually hiring agency help directly from agency... S it seems quite complex and variable)

One thing i do know is that everyone says if you do want any help one sould book it miles in advance since people get booked up. I fear i may not actually get around to it in time