Tell me honestly, have I got issues...?

[Gagagalaxy]

DH is wonderful; he really looks after me, makes me food, tidies up etc etc. Last Thursday he did some gardening, I think he mainly mowed the lawn and did a bit of weeding and I know some of the time he didn't where gloves.

Since then I haven't eaten any food he's prepared (sandwiches etc) because I'm worried about if some toxoplasmosis got on it. And I've just made myself a cheese sandwich and I'm paranoid that the cheese will have traces of it because he's used it lots. Am I perfectly normal to worry about this or have I got issues?

Everyone worries in pregnancy. That is normal. What you are describing and the tone of your posts would indicate to me that your thought processes are not normal.

This type of thing can escalate in pregnancy (probably the most "medicalised" time we experience). I echo others suggestions that you seek help.

I really hope your GP can help.

I hope this puts your mind at rest re toxo. The only way your oh could have come into contact with toxo is through cat poo in the soil. As I understand it cats are only infected with toxo once, generally when they're young and first start catching prey. Their poos are only risky in the week or so after they first contract it. So it's a very small window of potential infection.

I really don't think that the germs, even if they made it into your house, could live in your fridge for a week.

If it helps set your mind at rest I am a farmer's wife and last year had to get through lambing at about 16 weeks pregnant. We had 600 lambing sheep with the potential for toxo and other illnesses, and I didn't pick up anything. Dd is upstairs asleep, and is perfect.

Please talk to your midwife and Dr. I had anxiety issues too which were helped with counselling, and I'm so glad I talked to people.

I agree that you should have a chat with your midwife or GP. I went through similar with my second pregnancy and agree with the poster who said that even if you manage to put your mind at rest re the toxo, you will find something else to worry about.

If you're not comfortable talking to your midwife then talk to your GP or health visitor (in my case I had a very sympathetic GP that I was able to go back to several times about the anxiety issues while still seeing the midwife for the routine pregnancy stuff)

Good luck.

Thanks ladies. And Daisy that definitely puts things into perspective!

I just feel like I want to fast forward time so I know my baby is ok

Bless you, I am sure your baby will be absolutely OK. But I agree with the others - whilst some health anxieties, and concern for your baby, are absolutely normal during pregnancy, the extent and severity of what you are describing is probably not.

I continued doing the gardening, cutting grass etc MYSELF through two pregnancies (and am continuing to do so now, early on in my third) and have two beautiful, healthy children with not an infection in sight. So I would have to say that what you describe in your OP would honestly not have bothered me. BUT that said, though, I did develop other kinds of obsessive type behaviour in pregnancy (became utterly manic about keeping things tidy for example) so I completely sympathise with what you are going through. It is horrible when you know what you are doing and feeling is illogical but you can't help doing it - and the best thing you can do is get some help if your fears are having a fundamental effect on your daily life/happiness etc.

So definitely talk to your midwife and/or GP and see if you can get some help in putting things into perspective. I believe cognitive behaviour type therapies can be really helpful for OCD. Good luck.

Hi gagagalaxy, I strongly suspect you'll be absolutely fine and as the others have said chat to your MW/GP about your anxieties.

In the meantime can I suggest you keep off Google, it's not your friend at this point. We've all done it "and Google said it could be X" it's good to be aware of things but to be honest, a bit of ignorance can also be bliss. Useful source of info but google is not a search engine trained health professinal and it sounds like its more harm than good in your case if things are stressing you out.

Deep breath, you'll be fine :)

Gaga the day after I found out I was pregnant I was doing some gardening (wearing gloves), and found a bit of dried cat shit which I picked up with a trowel and attempted to flick over the back wall (onto a bit of waste land). Unfortunately a gust of wind caught it and blew it straight back into my face!

I didn't catch toxoplasmosis from that, so I am sure you will be fine

Mrsbugsywugsy...nearly choked on my toast! Brilliant!

gaga - don't know if this will help, but I work in rivers and will be doing so up till 39 weeks. The point being that I am a "high risk" worker for Leptospirosis and various other water-borne bugs, and that I was really quite woried by this when I was planning my pregnancies. I also spend a lot of time sitting around on riverbanks which are frequently fairly pooey places to be!

So, we therefore carried out a very comprehensive risk assessment with the help of the US Centre for Disease Control - and they came to the conclusion that provided I follow good hygiene and take care the risk is vanishingly small - far, far less than the risk I take by driving to sites.

What I took from this is that these potential problems are highlighted so that you can be aware of them and make sure you take reasonable precaution to prevent them - and that if you do then everything will be fine, as far as anything in life can be guaranteed.

If your DH has washed his hands then the risk has gone down the plughole. Most people would not worry about this. We all have bits we are irrationally scared of - I had a minor accident at 35 weeks with DD1 and, despite knowing there was no way in the world it could have affected her, I am still a teeny bit worried in case it had some long term effect - and she's 18 months now!

Hope it calms down for you soon.

Thanks all. I feel a bit calmer this morning.

I did a bit if back tracking (aka obsessional thinking) and I have worked out that DH did the gardening, some without gloves, on Thursday eve. He washed his hands after and also had a shower. The following day (Friday) he had another shower in the morning, would have washed his hands several times throughout the day after going to the toilet and that evening he made himself a sandwich with the cheese in question.

Fast forward 3 days and i make myself a sandwich using the same cheese. I am being so ridiculous it's untrue.

There was a similar incident last week with a different bit of cheese that DH had also cut from after gardening. I had some a few days later but scraped all the sides off before cutting it. For some reason I didn't worry about that at the time. But yesterday I got the seed planted in my head about toxo and now I am. So so ridiculous.

When I look back on my pregnancy I am going to have to call this Cheddargate

And mrsbugsywugsy - your at poo in face incident made me smile. Poor you!

Well I'm glad I gave everyone a laugh

Seriously though, AFAIK toxo is one of those bugs which you can only have once, and I've always had cats and spent my childhood eating dirt in the garden, so I would be very surprised if I wasn't immune.

I have always had cats, eaten rare steak, lived in France for a year, never been particularly bothered by hygiene (that makes me sound rank, but you know what I mean - always washed but wouldn't think twice about eating something I'd dropped on the floor ), played in dirt lots as a child - good chance I could be immune really isn't there!

I agree with all the other comments about talking to your gp/midwife. It must be very tiring all this worry you have.

To answer your question, i wouldnt be and wasnt worried about this. I moved house at 15 weeks and had to keep the cat in for a couple of weeks. i quite happily cleaned his litter tray, just made sure to wash my hands after - which i would have done regardless of being pregnant.

My main worry has been what foods can i eat, but i have pretty much carried on as normal and all seems to be going well with the pregnancy.

If anything i would say all the worrying would be causing more stress on the baby than the actual things your worrying about.

Gagagalaxy just to say you're not alone - I'm exactly the same and it is just one of those things that kicks in when I'm pregnant, getting better as the pregnancy progresses usually (eg it's better when I'm getting strong movements daily, which is later on). So I won't let DH make me any food (sometimes not even a cup of tea), I make him wash his hands before emptying the dishwasher (my own hands are dry as husks from all the washing). I would have been exactly the same as you over the cheese and probably chucked it away as a consequence. Yesterday I chucked away about four pieces of bread from a loaf that I'd bought because of being unsure about whether hands were clean that had touched it.

I completely accept that it's not normal or rational, and it is exhausting, isn't it? I have the same thing as you - that whenever there's something reassuring, like hearing the heartbeat or having a scan, I worry about what I've done since to ruin it. Helps to hear commonsense from ladies like those on this thread through - I tend to go searching for that when I get too neurotic. I remember a thread that sustained me in my last pregnancy - all about the 'wrong' things that people had done and still ended up with babies that were fine. I'll try and dig it out and post it!

When I'm not pregnant I'm quite gung-ho about hygiene etc! Can't wait until end of November when I can stop worrying. (But yes, I will then worry about other things - with my DD I had all sorts of worries for her safety as a newborn.)

I would recommend going to see someone if you can, particularly if you're planning any more pregnancies after this one. I should probably do the same!

Hi

Here's the thread I was talking about!

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/pregnancy/557291-am-i-the-only-person-who-doesn-t-appear-to/AllOnOnePage

Hope it helps

x

Georgee you have described my behaviour perfectly and you're right, it is extremely exhausting! It would be brilliant if you could link that thread!

I actually went to the docs today to ask for a toxoplasmosis test but she wouldn't do it :-( (I was naughty and didnt mention my anxiousness other than in relation to this incident). I exaggerated slightly and said DH had been gardening with no gloves, came in, washed his hands and then made us a sandwich and she said "oh you'll be fine. They won't do it anyway" Felt a bit brushed off to be honest but DH has told me to forget about it now and move on. So desperately going to try to do that!

Ooh you beat me to it! Thanks

One of my friends actually did get a toxo test, I think she talked about a French holiday she'd been on, uncooked burger etc ... but they had to have a phlebotamist (sp? - a blood person!) come from the hospital to do it especially so I can see their reluctance. I swore after my last pregnancy I'd have a toxo test done privately just in the hope that they'd tell me I was immune, but of course never got round to that with a baby to look after!

The same friend happened to meet a blood lab worker at a party some time later and was talking about her blood test (which was negative by the way) and this person said that she has only come across toxo once in many years of testing blood, and that was through someone with lowered immunity from HIV.

I think we gotta stop worrying - we have good evidence that all will be well!

Good luck and take care.

Hi there, I live in France where testing for Toxo seems to be routine at the start of each pregnancy.

I'd never heard about it before my first pg and was surprised to discover that I don't seem to be immune despite having grownup in the Countryside, had a household cat and eaten tonnes of raw meat products (I'm half Spanish!)...

Anyway, the impression I get from all the doctors who've brought up the subject is that they're far more concerned that I don't eat eating raw/cured meats or fish (fresh sushi) than I keep away from cats or the garden.

So if it's any consolation, I think Gaga you're probably safe from contracting it from DH's green fingers!