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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Making life easier after baby is born

32 replies

Loobylou12 · 17/06/2012 21:15

Ok so all my friends/family are asking what to do when baby comes they are mostly a few hundred miles away.
My mum offered to pay for a cleaner once a week for a few weeks which seems a nice idea. Thinking of asking friends that live nearby to help me with the batch cooking. Anyone think of a a anything else that will make being new parents a little easier? Should add baby has LOTS of things so nothing needed x

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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TheToadLessTravelled · 17/06/2012 21:33

Depending on how the delivery goes you may just want a friend to come and sit with you if your partner needs to go out in the early days. I had an EMCS and needed help lifting the baby etc for the first couple of weeks, which was unexpected.

Batch cooking was a great help, and we also asked friends to pick up groceries or ready meals a couple of times.

countydurhamlass · 17/06/2012 21:34

ask someone close to come and sit/be on hand so you can have a soak in the bath without worrying
ask someone to get you a few bits of shopping when they go to the supermarket
ask people to ring you before they turn up to check its ok and not be offended when you say you'd rather they didnt

Chubfuddler · 17/06/2012 21:36

Internet shopping
Batch cooking
Nice ready meals
Things you can eat with just a fork whilst bfing

Svrider · 17/06/2012 21:40

regular short visits from good friends is a good idea
They must bring cake
I found short a walk in the open air , with another adult every day really helped. (even when I didn't fell up to going, IYSWIM)

notsoold · 17/06/2012 22:13

A cleaner
Help with ironing
Batch cooking
Phoning before turning up
We asked everybody not to phone and let it ring forever as I might be bf or sorting the baby.
This time I will make arrangements for someone to walk the dog

Original poster

Loobylou12 · 17/06/2012 22:14

mega ideas thanks x

OP posts:

yousankmybattleship · 17/06/2012 22:17

Or just get on with it? It may surprise you to know you are not the first person to have a baby. It is crazy for the first few weeks but it is amazing and exciting too and the adrenaline carries you through. If you've got friends who can help that's lovely, but don't overthink it.

Original poster

Loobylou12 · 17/06/2012 22:21

well my husband may or may not be able to be around after 2 weeks paternity. working away. so would just like to be as best prepared as i can.nervous first timer and all that

OP posts:

monkeypuzzeltree · 17/06/2012 22:22

Sky plus some series or borrow box sets because it's really dull in the night watching Friends re-runs when you're feeding!

Other than having easy food around there's not a lot more you can do except go with the madness for the first few weeks!

monkeypuzzeltree · 17/06/2012 22:23

Oh and definitely get the cleaner

yousankmybattleship · 17/06/2012 22:26

You'll be fine. My husband wasn't around either and I had twins. You cope because you have to and then you feel really proud of yourself for getting through it. I wasn't tryng to be mean in my previous post, just reminding you that this is something that lots and lots of people have been through. I presume your friends have their own lives and don't necessarily need to be cooking for you. If your Mum wants to pay for a cleaner great - go for it - but the res tof the world may not feel they need to be at your beck and call.

fuckityfuckfuckfuck · 17/06/2012 22:29

I know you said not stuff, but get a Kari Me or Moby wrap sling. Honestly, it'll give you your hands back when you've got a baby who wants to be next to you but you need to do stuff. A true sanity saver. Apart from that I have to coldly agree with the advice to just get on with it. In the nicest way possible of course, but even if you plan minutely now, you may feel very differently about visitors and thigns after the birth. I thought I'd be fine but in the event I didn't want people who weren't close family to visit fro a good few weeks.
If your dp is around, get him to make you a lunch before he leaves for work and stash it in the fridge. My dp gets very cross if I've not had time to eat so he'll do this as often as he can so it's simply a case of reaching for a salad or sandwich or something. I've never seen the need for a cleaner, ime with just one baby at home it'll stay fairly clean, it's only after subsequent dc that it'll descend into squalor

fuckityfuckfuckfuck · 17/06/2012 22:36

Actually, having thought about it, the one thing that truly makes my life easier is co sleeping. I know it's not everyones cup of tea, but especially if your dp is going to be away anyway, it could be ideal. It means I get a decent nights sleep, every night, as I just have to feed ds lying down next to me,and we both just drift off. He's much harder to settle down to sleep in the daytime, so I'm grateful I'm not pacing the floor with him all night.

Brandnewbrighttomorrow · 17/06/2012 22:39

Yes to the cleaner as long as you're not a control freak, will just stress you out otherwise. Yyy to box sets, we've been through loads - sopranos, west wing, on mad men ATM.

Allow your friends and family to look after you - it's hard not to want to be hostess in your own home but it's only a short time that anyone will want to do it, so make the most of it! My NCT teacher recommended staying in your dressing gown for as long as possible, as soon as you're dressed the assumption will be that you're recovered.

Oh and give yourself permission to sit on the sofa indefinitely with your newborn and follow their cues. It'll give you chance to get to know them better and learn some of their likes and dislikes.

threeleftfeet · 17/06/2012 22:40

Second a sling (even though you said no stuff!) and co-sleeping.

NannyPlumIsMyMum · 17/06/2012 22:41

Agree with yousank just go with the flow.
To be honest nothing will prepare you for how life will change .
Having a cleaner for a short while might lull you into a false sense of security !
I would politely just ask people to be there to support and listen to you when you need it.

NannyPlumIsMyMum · 17/06/2012 22:43

Also agree with fuckity about co-sleeping , definitely !
Perhaps it might be more empowering to think of how you can make things easier for yourself ?

Original poster

Loobylou12 · 17/06/2012 22:45

ok cancel cleaner-buy sling
internet shopping
sky+
batch cooking
try get out if house
speak to people before about coming round/ringing
not in that order but i get the picture

OP posts:

NannyPlumIsMyMum · 17/06/2012 22:45

I did my own batch cooking in the 6 weeks before our DC were born - is this something you could do ?

Original poster

Loobylou12 · 17/06/2012 22:45

thanks one and all x

OP posts:

fuckityfuckfuckfuck · 17/06/2012 22:47

if you buy the sling, make sure you're confident in how to use it before dc is born. Very easy to get flustered when presented with that amount of material for the first time :) Youtube is good for videos, or evern better would be a slingmeet so you can be shown in the flesh. It's honestly second nature once you've done it a few times.

Original poster

Loobylou12 · 17/06/2012 22:47

yes i was going to do my own too x

OP posts:

NannyPlumIsMyMum · 18/06/2012 18:20

Good luck x

SkiBumMum · 18/06/2012 18:32

Install Skype on your and your mum's computers and teach her how to use it if necessary! Mine have an amazing bond with DSis even though she lives in Canada. We have regular Skype sessions.

SkiBumMum · 18/06/2012 18:33

Beef casserole is good for batch cooking as the iron helps.

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