What don't I know?

[strawberrybubblegum]

There seem to be so many things that other people just know about pregnancy, which come as a complete surprise to me! I'm really worried that I'll completely miss something important.

I'm 6+2 weeks. I know I should be able to figure this stuff out, but could you please, please help me out by pointing out stuff I've forgotten?

Formal stuff:

• Seen the GP, and chosen a hospital to give birth. Been given the free prescription form
• GP told me to sign up for NCT, since stuff gets booked up. Does she mean the antenatal course, which should presumably be just before my due date?
• Haven't done anything about maternity pay yet (I'm self-employed) - presumably I can worry about that later?

Diet and Lifestyle:

• I've cut out alcohol, and all the other foods they say you shouldn't eat
• Still trying to figure out what changes I need to make to my diet. Just realised I'm not eating enough protein: I'm not vegetarian, but I don't eat much meat. I just read yesterday that you need 70g of protein a day, which is a huge amount!! Is there anything else which I need to make sure I'm having enough of? I'm having a variety of fruit/veg, fish a couple of times a week, and taking a pregnancy vitamin supplement
• I've stopped very vigorous exercise, but carrying on with gentle versions
• Just started applying stretch mark oil.
• When do I need to start doing pelvic floor exercises?

I haven't started thinking about prams, cots etc - it all seems so far away! Is there anything I should start thinking about now?

What else do I need to do now, which I simply haven't thought of? Especially things which will get booked up (like NCT), or which will have an effect at this point of my pregnancy (like not getting enough protein), or which I'll suffer from later if I don't do now (like stretch mark cream and pelvic floor exercises)?

Thanks very much for any suggestions!

When you see the midwife you will be given a 'purple book' - it contains pretty much all the basics. You can sign up to babycentre/what to expect emails or just check the pregnancy forums on here.

I'd say as long as you don't drink or smoke, are taking a pregnancy vitamin/folic acid, do no heavy lifting and avoid the usual foods there's not an awful lot you 'need' to know. During my first pregnancy I wanted to know everything - this time as long as everything is fine I don't even think about it.

All you really need to know is that in 8 or 9 months your life will change in ways you could never have imagined. If you want to do some research its probably more beneficial to learn about birth and babies than pregnancy itself. Enjoy it!

You mean you haven't signed them up for a primary school yet? Just kidding, I think you've already thought of much more than me!

I'm 7 weeks and have swapped alcohol for folic acid supplements, but that's about it. Oh, and I stopped taking hayfever tablets at the weekend after it finally occurred to me to check whether I was supposed to have them .

I'm still getting my head around which foods are OK - I got halfway through a prawn sandwich the other day before I started to get a nagging feeling I wasn't supposed to be eating it. Oh dear, 7 weeks along and I am already a Terrible Mother.

I have my first midwife appointment on Friday so hopefully I'll get some advice then.

Til then I will watch this thread with interest

Hello,

Please don't worry, I'm 22 weeks and still a bit clueless. I'm a veggie so I take an all in one pregnacare tablet from Wilkinsons that gives you everything you need (inc folic acid) and is not expensive at all, so I would recommend that.

Have only just started applying stretchmark oil (too late) so well done for starting already, haven't really done much pelvic floor - but know I should. Also, didn't know lots of things I should until people pointed it out to me. For example, didn't know you can't put a newborn in most buggies until SIL told me.

I've found that MW hasn't really given me much info/advice (or at least hasn't so far) so the internet, books, friends, family and colleagues and of course MN has been invaluable. :)

Maternity Allowance you can sort any time after 26w when you get your MATB1 from the MW. You download the forms from the direct.gov website.

The other thing is relax. I have no idea how much protein I ate per day, didn't get my 5-a-day, ate rare steak and didn't do pelvic floor exercises before or attend any antenatal or parenting classes. That's what MN is for and besides, they can never prepare you for the reality of labour or parenthood.

Prawn sandwiches are gone mrsbugsywugsy

Unless your prawns were raw they are OK!
Or at least according to the NHS site

nope, definitely cooked prawns. Phew!

My diet has gone to pot, I used to get my five a day at least but now I don't fancy much fruit and veg. I made a shepherd's pie at the weekend but could only eat the potato because I couldn't stand the taste of the onions.

Is stretchmark oil a special kind of oil or will any old kind do?

Because I have had some worrying symptoms (spotting etc) I have been trying not to get too excited and research too much, in case it doesn't work out. But on the other hand I don't want to bugger things up for later on if there are some things I really ought to be doing.

21 weeks here and completely clueless.

I was very good in the beginning about taking folic acid though I completely forget to take my vitamins now But my diet is very good!

My biggest issue is ante natal classes. Going purely by TV, I thought the NHS put on Lamars classes and stuff So I don't have a clue what kind of preparation I should be doing.

I have vague ideas about hypnobirthing and potentially a homebirth but equally up for the MLU at the Princess Royal. I've been doing a bit of ante natal yoga but am useless at doing pelvic floor exercises - remembering and how to actually do them!

Start taking folic acid supplement. Unless its in the pregnancy one.

As for stretch mark cream if your going to get um your going to get um. No amount of lotions n potions can prevent it.

Starting pelvic floor exercises you really should do these regardless of if your pregnant or not!

I'd hold off signing up to NCT just yet. Most healthcare trusts do ante natal classes that cover the basics rather than shell out a few hundred quid on NCT ones. But obviously that's your choice

But everything else you'll suss out along the way. Best thing to do is just chill out and relax

Hi everyone!

I love this thread! This is exactly how I feel (although I think I am calming down a little bit.) I am 12+3 and just want to do the best I possibly can. Haven't been great with my fruit and vegetables as all I've really wanted since I found out was lovely, hearty STODGE :) Getting a little bit better now and am trying to trick myself by putting lots of veg in evening meals...also have eaten lots of soups, etc.

I've cut out alcohol too....although I only found out after 6 weeks so had been on holiday and had consumed more than my fair share of piña coladas by the pool! Oh well...I stopped when I found out, which is the main thing....right?! Have cut right down on caffeine (I am a bit of a tea addict) and have swapped to M&S decaf, which I would REALLY recommend - I like it the best out of all the decaf teas I've tried (and I've tried out quite a few!)

Exercise-wise, I am starting to have more energy, so hope to start again next week. I have my 12 week scan this Friday, which I am nervous about, but hopefully, if all goes well, I will start an antenatal aqua fit class and an antenatal yoga class next week. I think I will alternate these with a little bit of gentle swimming. So far, all I've been doing is trying to walk a few miles each day - nothing more adventurous than that. Has anyone tried any of the pregnancy exercise DVDs? Wondering if they're worth a try...

As for anti-stretchmark oil, I haven't tried any oil, but I have been using Palmers Cocoa Buttter which, if nothing else, smells really nice :) My friend has recommended a Mothercare bath milk which is supposed to be fantastic and keeps your skin really soft - I am going to buy some later today:

www.mothercare.com/Mothercare-It's-Your-Body-Bath-Milk---300ml/354357,default,pd.html

Oh and pelvic floor exercises....basically I do them every time I read or see something that reminds me about them. Which can be once or twice a day or....erm, slightly less regularly than that. Needless to say I am doing them right now. I still haven't figured out if my facial expression changes as I do them....which doesn't make them ideal for work.

Wow! I have rambled on FOREVER! Sorry ladies!

Jo x

I second everyone that says relax! I'm 25 + 5 and wish i'd relaxed more in the beginning!
Take your folic acid/vitamins, drink plenty of water and try to eat a healthy diet (although i only started doing this after 16 weeks because i felt so awful before then!). If you want something, try not to deny yourself too much, you'll only want it more! MN and Babycentre are great for advice if your midwife is a bit unforthcoming with the infos. :)

And remember, just because a book or a website or someone tells you something - i.e you need to keep up your exercise, do yoga, sign up to these classes, come out to this gig, go out for dinner etc, only do it if you want to. You're growing a new person, it takes a lot of effort and don't feel like you have to keep up with everything!!

oh god, i hope that didnt sound patronising, it wasnt meant to! I'm learning all the time still, theres loads i still dont know! But i'm not worried, we all get there in the end!

Ah yes, if you're going to get stretch marks then no oil or cream will stop them!

Yes flisspaps I got to 42 week without a mark. Then I swear overnight they just appeared!!

Doesn't sound patronising at all, cakelady . That's very good advice to relax, and try to take things a bit easy. I'll try!

Flisspaps : thanks for the info about the maternity allowance. Glad it's not too tricky. Being self-employed, as it's worked out I've not got any work right now - that's usually the downside of working for yourself, but I've been very grateful as complete exhaustion has hit! Hoping that the exhaustion will go soon, and I'll be able to get another project in before the baby arrives, for financial reasons!

MrsBugsy : you gave me a scare with the mention of signing him/her up for school! I'm sure someone once told me that nursery places get signed up pretty much from birth... but I'm sticking my head in the sand about that one!

I'm not sure about whether oil helps against stretch marks, but I figure I may as well give it a go! I saw Mama Mio recommended on another thread, so that's the one I've got. That Mothercare bath milk sounds lovely too, WeeJo.

Oooh - anti-natal yoga! I'm sure I've heard that mentioned before. I'm not a very stretchy person, so that sounds like a good thing to look into, to prepare for delivery. (eek - it still scares me to think of that!)

Thanks for all the great tips. Do please keep them coming ladies :-)

oops sorry, cross post with Flisspaps and melliebobs! I know the theory is that the damage happens so deep in the skin, that oil can't reach it... but I guess I feel the need to try!

Nursery places. Deffo don't leave it to the last minute. I thought my husband was lying saying they were hard to get into with massive waiting lists. Im due to go back to work in nov but had to put a name down at a nursery before she was born. And that's not even with being fussy about getting into 'a good one!'

Ah, thanks for that warning melliebobs! In that case, I shall get my head out of the sand, and look at nurseries in the next few months!

I got stretchmarks when I was a teenager so I guess I am prone to them

My work has a nursery which they can't fill, but they only take children from 2 years and only open 40 weeks a year, so I'm not sure how helpful that will be

I do yoga normally but have been too tired recently, plus I'm a bit unsure which exercises I'm not supposed to do. I go to a class run through my work and don't want to out myself as pregnant by telling the teacher, so thought I'd better stop going for a few weeks.

However if you want a childminder, we can't accept a deposit or sign paperwork guaranteeing a place until the baby is born

In regards to exercise in the early stages you can do what you did before if your feeling up to it. Just stay hydrated throughout and have a good gradual extended warm up and cool down afterwards

Pregnancy yoga I found great.

My stretch marks also appeared overnight from nowhere at 40 weeks.

My sole bit of advice I dish out to everyone - in your hospital bag take a pack of babywipes just for you to use as toilet paper. Only once did dry stuff go near my battered and bruised bits!

Sorry - no time to read whole thread but check out 'The Best Friend's Guide to Pregnancy' by (book) which was fab for my first pregnancy as it addresses common pregnancy questions, fears, and so on but with a generous dollop of humour which 'proper' books sometimes lack. It's been criticised for being US centric and I am not recommending as a pregnancy bible but it is good for a bit of relief when your brain is boggling with too much information, if only to reassure you that a boggling brain is entirely normal! Take your time, don't panic and enjoy preparing for baby, it is a special time! Good luck